Every time I find a dress I like for bridesmaids, someone doesnt like it. Whose choice is this, the bride or bridesmaids?
It seems to me every wedding party I've been in the bride picked the bridesmaids dresses.
I'm thinking of cutting out my whole wedding party and having just me and FH. Who need the aggravation.
Every dress is strapless or with spaghetti straps and everyone wants to cover their shoulders with short sleeves. It's a june wedding.
What do you guys think?
dianadrw
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Re: Bridesmaids Dresses - Disagreement
This is the one area I strongly feel the 'my day, my way' mantra doesn't apply. I have been a bridesmaid 6 times and each time was a somewhat unpleasant experience. There's nothing worse that being told you have to wear some ugly uncomfortable $300 dress! I swore I would not do that to my girls. My MOH is plus size and I know that she is uncomfortable about her arms. The LAST thing I'd do is make her wear a strapless dress! That is why she and I are picking out a few dresses for the girls to choose from and each girl can wear the dress she is the most comfortable in. Think about why you are having these girls in your wedding. It is so they can be there to support you because they are important people in your life. Just a little perspective IMHO.
Blu-ize
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Re: Bridesmaids Dresses - Disagreement
Posted by dianadrw
This is the one area I strongly feel the 'my day, my way' mantra doesn't apply. I have been a bridesmaid 6 times and each time was a somewhat unpleasant experience. There's nothing worse that being told you have to wear some ugly uncomfortable $300 dress! I swore I would not do that to my girls. My MOH is plus size and I know that she is uncomfortable about her arms. The LAST thing I'd do is make her wear a strapless dress! That is why she and I are picking out a few dresses for the girls to choose from and each girl can wear the dress she is the most comfortable in. Think about why you are having these girls in your wedding. It is so they can be there to support you because they are important people in your life. Just a little perspective IMHO.
I agree-maybe pick a color and a designer and let them each pick the style that they like.
RadioLau
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Re: Bridesmaids Dresses - Disagreement
It is ultimately the bride's choice. Have them get shawls if they want to cover their shoulders.
SillyBeans
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Re: Bridesmaids Dresses - Disagreement
It's your wedding, YOU pick the dress. If you want, you can pick 2 or 3 then have them decide and agree on ONE. Nerve, When I am in a wedding party, I just smile and never complain ( to the bride anyway) because that is part of being in the wedding party. Not everyone is going to be happy no matter what you do
Jweb17
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Re: Bridesmaids Dresses - Disagreement
I completely agree! I'm having 8 girls in my BP and I know that there is no way that I will be able to bring them all to shop and have them agree on one dress. So, I decided to not give myself that headache and go with my MOH and another BM to pick it out, that's what worked for me.
Mackenzie_11-19-05
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Re: Bridesmaids Dresses - Disagreement
'This is the one area I strongly feel the 'my day, my way' mantra doesn't apply.'
I tend to agree with this, for a few reasons.
1. People look better in pictures when they are happy and comfortable. If they are feeling self conscious and unhappy and uncomfortable they will not be smiling in your pictures.
2. Your BMs are their to help you stay calm and take care of details for you and pretty much worry about you and not themselves for the whole day. If they like their dress and aren't constantly worried about how they look, they are more likely to help you out when you need it the most.
That is my $.02. Good luck!
BHW
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Re: Bridesmaids Dresses - Disagreement
Posted by amyg1033
They should be honored that you even asked them to be a part of your wedding party. It's really not their place to complain about a dress. As long as your not picking out some expensive potato sack for them to all wear, they should just be happy that you asked them. Try to listen to them, take their opinions to heart, and try to see where they're coming from, but in the end, it's your vision that they need to comply with, not their own. I can see how they don't want to spend a lot of money on a dress they don't like and that's totally understandable. However, part of being a bridesmaid is being there for a bride and the last thing one should do as a BM is make life more difficult for the bride by making dress buying a hassle.
I agree. You're never going to please everybody and you shouldn't be stressed b/c you feel like you have to. When you agree to be a BM, you agree to the financial obligations, including buying a dress. There's always a possibility you won't like the dress, but you deal with it. It's one thing to make a suggestion about the type of dress you feel most comfortable in, but if the bride chooses another style of dress, I think it's really rude to complain about it.
heidla
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Re: Bridesmaids Dresses - Disagreement
Personally, I felt awkward about picking out a dress for someone else to buy. The women in our BP all were different shapes. So, I picked the color black and let them choose for themselves. They did ask my opinion, but the final decision was their's. It worked out well for me and took some of the stress off my shoulders.
jenny26
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Re: Bridesmaids Dresses - Disagreement
I agree, you can't please evreyone. You should try your best though. I can remember a horrible dress I had to wear. Noone wants to be uncomfortable and out $400. My girls did not want strapless, so I took my sister and MOH and we picked out the dress. Everyone else saw it had starps and were very happy! You have to try to meet them half way.
