Can this day go any slower??

I DO!

A woman walks into a suprmarket and buys:

1 can of tuna
1 roll of toilet paper
1 piece of chicken
1 roll
1 magazine
1 apple

So she goes up the counter and pays for her stuff when the clerk says to her:

'Ma'am you must be single.'

To which she replies:

'Why? Because i bought 1 of everything?'

and he says:

'No, its because you are so fu**ing ugly!'

That was sooo Messed up!!!!

How about some insults??

mazing Insults

He's so fat, he has the only car in town with stretch marks.

He's so short he can sit on a piece of toilet paper and dangle his feet.

He's the first in his family born without a tail.

What color is the sky in your world?

What he lacks in intelligence, he more than makes up for in stupidity.

When God was throwing intelligence down to the Earth, you were holding an umbrella.

When I look into your eyes, I see the back of your head.

You're so ugly your husband takes you with him everywhere he goes so he doesn't have to kiss you bye.

Instead of being born again, why don't you just grow up?

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Posted by SIBride06

That was sooo Messed up!!!!

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It was but c'mon I know you laughed.

It could go slower...if it was MONDAY!

Thank God it's Thursday and there's only ONE MORE DAY left!

That joke was great - supermarket...ugly...hehehehehehehehehe!

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Posted by Goldi1021

I DO!

A woman walks into a suprmarket and buys:

1 can of tuna
1 roll of toilet paper
1 piece of chicken
1 roll
1 magazine
1 apple

So she goes up the counter and pays for her stuff when the clerk says to her:

'Ma'am you must be single.'

To which she replies:

'Why? Because i bought 1 of everything?'

and he says:

'No, its because you are so fu**ing ugly!'

---

OMG, that so reminds me of the Family Guy episode where the Mom takes Meg shopping for new jeans and when she comes out of the dressing room the sales lady starts screaming, douses herself in gasoline and lights herself on fire.

Sorry, I'm a Family Guy geek.

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Posted by MissingTheBGene

OMG, that so reminds me of the Family Guy episode where the Mom takes Meg shopping for new jeans and when she comes out of the dressing room the sales lady starts screaming, douses herself in gasoline and lights herself on fire.

Sorry, I'm a Family Guy geek.

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I saw that one - HAHAHA - so funny FH is obsessed with that show!

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Posted by SuzBride

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Posted by MissingTheBGene

OMG, that so reminds me of the Family Guy episode where the Mom takes Meg shopping for new jeans and when she comes out of the dressing room the sales lady starts screaming, douses herself in gasoline and lights herself on fire.

Sorry, I'm a Family Guy geek.

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I saw that one - HAHAHA - so funny FH is obsessed with that show!

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I'm glad to know that FH and I aren't the only ones!

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Posted by MissingTheBGene

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Posted by SuzBride

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Posted by MissingTheBGene

OMG, that so reminds me of the Family Guy episode where the Mom takes Meg shopping for new jeans and when she comes out of the dressing room the sales lady starts screaming, douses herself in gasoline and lights herself on fire.

Sorry, I'm a Family Guy geek.

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I saw that one - HAHAHA - so funny FH is obsessed with that show!

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I'm glad to know that FH and I aren't the only ones!

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No...definitely not the only ones! FI and I watch it EVERY SINGLE NIGHT!

Mickey and Minnie mouse were having a lot of problems. Mickey wanted a divorce. Minnie suggested they see a marriage counselor, before making any rash decisions. The marriage counselor carefully listened to their problems, 'Mickey,' he said 'I don't think it's fair to divorce Minnie just because she is silly' To this Mickey responded 'I'm not divorcing her because she's silly, I'm divorcing her because she's f-ing Goofy!'

this day is surely dragging...Only 1 hour left til I go become a homeowner!

What do Michael Jackson and Caviar have in common?


They both come on little crackers.



Dirrrrtttyy

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Posted by esb980

Mickey and Minnie mouse were having a lot of problems. Mickey wanted a divorce. Minnie suggested they see a marriage counselor, before making any rash decisions. The marriage counselor carefully listened to their problems, 'Mickey,' he said 'I don't think it's fair to divorce Minnie just because she is silly' To this Mickey responded 'I'm not divorcing her because she's silly, I'm divorcing her because she's f-ing Goofy!'

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LMAO!!!

Whats green, slimy, and smells like pork?


Kermits fingers!

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Posted by Goldi1021

I have a very crude joke in incredibly poor taste. It does not have foul language but... should I do it?

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definitely!

Ok.

Q:
How do you circumcise a redneck?

A:
Smack his sister in the back of her head!