Catholic question...

Tsulls878 Posted: Jun 29, 2011 07:43 PM

Catholic question...

Is it true that if you do not get married in a church then you can not baptize your children in the church?? I planned on getting married at my venue and have heard that a priest can not marry me there :(

Angel120905 Posted: Jun 29, 2011 08:00 PM

Re: Catholic question...

I have heard it can just make thing more difficult when you go to baptize a child. but depends on your church mine is some what conservative so we are getting married in the church.

christinajimmy06 Posted: Jun 29, 2011 08:13 PM

Re: Catholic question...

Posted by Tsulls878

Is it true that if you do not get married in a church then you can not baptize your children in the church?? I planned on getting married at my venue and have heard that a priest can not marry me there :(

FH and I went back and forth about this.
FSIL and FBIL got married at a vfw because she was 5 mo. pregnant and couldn't be married in the church because of this..
They were able to baptize their daughter in the church afterwards only because future parents in law have been parishoners for many, many years.
FPIL had to be the godparents in the eyes of the church, but FSIL& FBIL had chosen 2 other people to be her godparents.

Because of that whole fiasco, we decided that it would be easier if we got married in the church.

HTH!

Would you consider getting married at the reception hall now and then maybe renew your vows for your 1-year anniversary in the church?

Jmrosa1 Posted: Jun 29, 2011 11:01 PM

Re: Catholic question...

My friends got married in a non-catholic church, and when they wanted to baptize their daughter they had to remarry in the catholic church before they could do it. So you may want to look into everything before you make a final decision.

Yankeeelove Posted: Jun 30, 2011 08:43 AM

Re: Catholic question...

The deacon at my church will baptize your baby regardless of where you got married. My friend wasn't married in the Catholic church but was still able to baptize her baby there. It all depends on the church, some are more stricter than others. I would def ask, bc when I asked for my friend he didn't even question it. Right away he said, absolutely we'll do it!

Thar1127 Posted: Jun 30, 2011 08:51 AM

Re: Catholic question...

it depends on the church- I have heard of both things happening. I would check with your church if you want your child baptized there

toniann921 Posted: Jun 30, 2011 09:15 AM

Re: Catholic question...

Posted by Thar1127

it depends on the church- I have heard of both things happening. I would check with your church if you want your child baptized there

THIS!

fdnybride163 Posted: Jun 30, 2011 09:15 AM

Re: Catholic question...

if it is a true roman catholic church then yes

but some other christian churchs dont really care.

FH is lutheran, im catholic and we are getting married at his church, and i dont give a flying ish if the RC church wont 'recognize' the marriage bc it wasnt in theirs....

to me i am still getting married under God, and thats all that matters to me.

halfbaked Posted: Jun 30, 2011 09:22 AM

Re: Catholic question...

It'll definitely make the process more difficult, but not impossible. I believe you'd have to have your marriage blessed in a church before baptizing your children.

ourwedding9510 Posted: Jun 30, 2011 09:30 AM

Re: Catholic question...

We got married at the RH and were told to get what is called an aformation (sp?). It is a document that says that the church recognizes the marriage.

I also asked about bapism when we have children. Some churches will do it and some won't. Money speaks pretty much. I'm Jewish and DH is Catholic but we are raising our children Catholic.

Also, if you get married my a priest outside the Catholic church it is 9 out of 10 times a retired priest and is not recognized by the Catholic church.

The best thing to do is call around to different churches and ask what their requirements are to baptize your future children.

ALSO, try the LIF boards. They might be able to help a little more with this question.

HTH!

VeePro Posted: Jun 30, 2011 11:05 AM

Re: Catholic question...

My friend got married at Flowefield and she had a priest come there. Ask maybe they will do it

Elsalvitalian Posted: Jun 30, 2011 11:22 AM

Re: Catholic question...

I think its horrible that you have to go through such things... I was not married and had a child out of wedlock but co-habitating with my child's father at the time and I didn't have a problem baptizing her. Now several years later, I am no longer with her father and getting married in September but my fiance and I are co-habitating. A couple of catholic churches turned us away because of this, but if you find the right one they will definitely do it. Unfortunately, money talks but we wanted to be married by a church that wasn't money driven. Thank God we found Parish of Saint Patrick in Bay Shore. They didn't care about our status and genuinely accepted us. They're goal is to spread the word and get us involved in the church, which to us, was important. Especially since we want to teach our children about religion. I don't think most churches will allow the priest to marry couple outside of the church because as it was explained to us, they want the ceremony to be sacred and to be focused on the couple and the commitment they are vowing to before God. They think that anywhere else will just be distracting and take away from the moment that is supposed to be a special one between you and your spouse and God. thought this might help... Good Luck!

Future Mrs H Posted: Jun 30, 2011 01:11 PM

Re: Catholic question...

My brother and SIL didnt get married in a church (She is non-practicing Mormon and he is Catholic) and they were able to baptize both of their children in the Catholic Church. I also know people who are not married, have children and are able to have their kids baptized.

leesah85 Posted: Jun 30, 2011 01:17 PM

Re: Catholic question...

ive never heard of such a thing

i have two cousins that have jewish spouses and were married at RHs and all of their children were baptised

i guess it depends on the church

SMDC2012 Posted: Jun 30, 2011 01:31 PM

Re: Catholic question...

I couldn't be a godmother to my nephew bc I never made my confirmation in the catholic church yet 3 years earlier they let me be the godmother to my niece at the same church, it all depends on who is running the church at the time and what their views are.

LindsaylovesJustin Posted: Jun 30, 2011 05:05 PM

Re: Catholic question...

The only time a catholic priest can leave the church is if the BRIDE is Jewish.

This was a big issue - but we finally convinced the priest to co-officiate with a Rabbi at our venue since I am jewish.

TeemHenn Posted: Jun 30, 2011 11:30 PM

Re: Catholic question...

I should let my mother read this post!

She had a really hard time when my brother got married at the RH hall and not in the church

chliekm Posted: Jul 01, 2011 05:48 PM

Re: Catholic question...

Posted by Thar1127

it depends on the church- I have heard of both things happening. I would check with your church if you want your child baptized there

MOST catholic churches will be OK with it because they are happy you are getting your children baptised and they do want to continue to build the church and increase its numbers... however there are still some churches out there that won't let you do it.. so def ask your church if you are considering not doing it.

dunnkat Posted: Jul 01, 2011 05:54 PM

Re: Catholic question...

My sister got married at the RH and had no problems baptizing her children, also my other sister was married in the church when she was pregnant and no problems either. I guess it depends with each church, ours is Roman Catholic and we have never had a problem with them on anything,

FutureMrsCat050412 Posted: Jul 01, 2011 09:32 PM

Re: Catholic question...

Posted by fdnybride163

if it is a true roman catholic church then yes

but some other christian churchs dont really care.

FH is lutheran, im catholic and we are getting married at his church, and i dont give a flying ish if the RC church wont 'recognize' the marriage bc it wasnt in theirs....

to me i am still getting married under God, and thats all that matters to me.

I'm lutheran & FH is catholic & we are getting married at his grandparents church. we both are not religious but we did learn a few things in this process. From what I heard Catholics do not accept other religions. In the lutheran church everyone is welcome. I am able to get married at his church but I can't receive communion bc of this 'not accepting' thing. Catholics CAN receive communion at a lutheran church. I don't know what happens when we decide to have kids & baptize them.