Church VS RH... WITH POLL!!

Okay soo i always assumed FH and i would be married at our church... we belong to the same church so that was never a problem.... this was all well and fine until i saw the outdoor ceremony space set up at my RH and i completely and utterly fell head over heels in love with what it looks like!... its just so gorgeous to me....I don't however love the indoor ceremony space but it isn't horrible.. Now my date is 'penciled in' at my church i havent filled out any paper work or met with anyone yet....

i don't know what to do...

CHURCH
Pros: the ceremony would be at like 3 and leave us plenty of time for pictures before cocktail hr at 7... and fh dad goes to church every sunday so it would be a nice thing for him....

Cons: the church is HUGE im soo scared its gonna feel empty and not personal and not that many people would come... however

RH
Pros: it would be convenient for guests to come... more people would be there for our actual ceremony the outside space is gorgeous and i could get ready in the huge bridal floor!...

Cons: Ceremony would be at about 6...which would mean i would miss most of cocktail hr for pictures... (cocktail hr is an 1hr 1/2) and of course the question of the church 'recognizing' my marriage


ahhh im getting down to the wire and need to make a decision ASAP so any help or thought would be appreciated!!

thanks

Thats the same dilema I'm going through. Always envisioned me getting married in my church but FH is REALLY not feeling the idea. MY RH's chapel is beautiful but I'm unsure about what I can do with the space....

hes no help lol he doesnt know either... he tends to lean for the RH i think cause he thinks its what i want.... but idk what i want lol... and my cocktail hr is from 7-830 i guess i would have to talk to my photographer and ask them how much time they need for pics ahhhhh i just dont know i wish that there was a magical way for decisions to be made w/o me actually having to make them lol

hey! I too always thought i would get married in my church..however my church has changed more than once over the years and we are having MANY OOT guests we decided it was easier to do it all at the RH. I like the idea of having a shorter but meaningful ceremony rather than a full mass and I like that all my guests will most likely be at the ceremony since the cocktail hour starts immediately following it.

I dont know if you thought about this but you could set aside 1.5 to 2 hrs before the ceremony to take pics with FH and bridal party. A lot of photographers set up an intimate moment where you and FH see each other for the first time and have some time to take pics alone together. I always thought my FH would hate this idea but he told me he loves it since it'll lessen the nerves the ceremony starts. Of course that is something to think about and if youre not comfortable doing them before then having the ceremony at the RH you willl prob miss part of your CH.

of course you have to do what makes you happy. If you are going to regret not getting married in a church then you should prob stick with it. But i think you can have a very personal and intimate ceremony at the RH if you wanted to. plus imo outdoor ceremonies are GORGEOUS!

sorry for the long winded response...i just wanted to explain the pros of the rh ceremony since i was going through the same dilemna as u.

---

Posted by sandybeaches115

hey! I too always thought i would get married in my church..however my church has changed more than once over the years and we are having MANY OOT guests we decided it was easier to do it all at the RH. I like the idea of having a shorter but meaningful ceremony rather than a full mass and I like that all my guests will most likely be at the ceremony since the cocktail hour starts immediately following it.

I dont know if you thought about this but you could set aside 1.5 to 2 hrs before the ceremony to take pics with FH and bridal party. A lot of photographers set up an intimate moment where you and FH see each other for the first time and have some time to take pics alone together. I always thought my FH would hate this idea but he told me he loves it since it'll lessen the nerves the ceremony starts. Of course that is something to think about and if youre not comfortable doing them before then having the ceremony at the RH you willl prob miss part of your CH.

of course you have to do what makes you happy. If you are going to regret not getting married in a church then you should prob stick with it. But i think you can have a very personal and intimate ceremony at the RH if you wanted to. plus imo outdoor ceremonies are GORGEOUS!

sorry for the long winded response...i just wanted to explain the pros of the rh ceremony since i was going through the same dilemna as u.

---

thank u sooo much for the long winded response lol i appreciate it!!!!.... i dont think i wanna see FH before ceremony but we talked about taking as many other pics as we possibly could take w/o seeing eachother leaving the ones with the both of us for after the ceremony.... i think that even if i did it like that i would still get to be at atleast a half hr of my cocktail hr ... and if all goes well cocktail hr will also be outside where i will be taking pics so it wont be like ill be completely detached from everything ... i gotta think about it and give myself a serious deadline! lol

thanks for the help ladies!

We were originally going to do it at the RH but decided I always wanted the church wedding and didn't want to miss the CH at all...don't want to see each other before either

We were at a wedding that was huge but everyone sat toward the front so it still felt intimate..no one was looking behind them

Sorry I know that doesn't help you but go with which you want more..the church with time to take pics or having a lot of people at your ceremony.

i can see why you're having a hard time with this...there are so many things to think about....
for me, it wasn't really an option...I think my mom would have been really upset if we didn't get married in the church, so I didn't really think about having the ceremony at the RH. When we went for our meeting at the church, it was really special - we got to talk about when we fell in love and why we want to get married to each other, which was different in a great way bc sometimes all the impt stuff gets lost in the shuffle of life esp after being together for 10 + yrs. It really made me feel like we were getting married - not just throwing a 'wedding', know what i mean? After leaving that meeting, I'm really glad we decided to get married in the church....

but, you have to decide what's more impt to you and ur fh....would it kill you if not a lot of ppl were at the ceremony? do you want to miss part of your CH hour? I think it will be still light out after ur ceremony is over, so that shouldn't be an issue as far as getting good pix outside...what if it rains? does the RH have an indoor space that you like?

hth good luck!