Compiling a list of things you DON'T need... please contribute

My friend is getting married later this year and asked me for things that aren't necessary. Here's my personal list and my reasons, please add your own so I can print and send to her. I know everyone has different things, so please put your reasons on there too! Thanks!!

- Engagement Pics: I know a lot of brides get them and are very happy with them, but I personally saw no need for them. I figured after the wedding, we'd put wedding pics up in our apartment anyway. And since they were included in the package, I just traded them for 2 professional albums, which I gave to each set of parents.

- Limos: We had pics taken before the ceremony at the ceremony sight, so there was no need to 'arrive in style' since no one would see us arriving.

- Upgrades no one would notice: I used simple silverware and linens. I figured with the lights dimmed at night, no one would notice fancy tablecloths versus regular ones.

- DIY placecards/programs/guestbook: People look at the programs during the ceremony and then toss them. Why spend $$$ on something so temporary so I made them myself. I made one and then went to Kinkos to have them duplicate 150. Total cost was less than $50 for materials + Kinkos for 150 programs. As for the guestbook, I made it on picaboo.com for $32 and brought it with me to the rehearsal dinner so at least the 'important' people got to sign it.

- Wedding shoes: My dress is very long and there's no way anyone would see my shoes unless I lifted up my dress. So I didn't buy shoes, and instead wore my very comfy high heels that I wear to work everyday.

Definitely limos. I just don't see the point of the expense. We are still debating whether or not we will take the shuttle we hire for the OOT guests or if we'll just drive

I agree on shoes as well...comfort over looks!!

Another one I'd say is that you don't need a huge floral budget!! We were able to get everything we wanted for around $2000! I'd hate to spend tons of money on something that will just die by the next day

For us it was Valet,

You had to tip the Valet i believe .75 per car, we got married on a college campus so there was ample parking behind the mansion so we just had our guests park their own car and walk to the front of the Mansion (the mansion faces the water so guests would have to go through the small parking lot to get to the front of the mansion). We also did not have guests waiting 20 minutes for their car at the end of the reception.

we ended up substituting valet for a chocolate fountain

I completely disagree with your take on e-pics. My FH and I took our e-pics and they came out awful. Not only that, but our photographer rushed us through, spent no time posing us to make the pics look good, and had terrible scenery. We were PETRIFIED for our wedding, so we wound up switching to a different photographer. We did our e-pics again and LOVED them and our photographer. I STRONGLY suggest taking e-pics. Even if you don't buy them and put them all over your house, it gives you a 'practice' session to make sure you and your photographer are a good match.

P.S. We got a pic we loved from our e-pic session to put up at the wedding.

Slipper baskets--of all the weddings I've been to that had them, NO ONE used them.

Cry Packs--Presumptuous, IMO.

Petal Cones, Bubbles, etc--Never get used.

Table Cameras--Pics never come out.

I don't think e-pics are necessary unless you plan on using them for something. For me though, I wanted to do a trash the dress shoot and basically they had a package that included that and epics and 2 hours extra for $600 more than what we were paying. Had I just added 2 hrs it would have been $400 or the TTD shoot it would have been $200 so we're kind of getting them thrown in. Oh yeah, TTD shoots are unnecessary unless you have a bride that loves her gown so much she wants to drag it down spray painted alleys!

Bathroom baskets are not necessary but they are nice. I put together wonderful ones but I didn't buy out three aisles of stuff to do them. I didn't bother with slipper baskets. Know why? My BP & I always bring flip flops or ballet flats to a wedding.

Personalized napkins and matches, aisle runner, petal cones, cry packs and programs. While a few of these add a nice touch, often all of them will seem over the top.

I decided early on that I love candlelight and I wanted candle centerpieces. Shopping around and getting different quotes from florist saved me a ton though on everything else.

I went a little overboard with BP gifts which was unnecessary. A few gifts are wonderful, the amount that I purchased was crazy.

We aren't getting limo's. We thought about it but it didn't make sense for where everyone was coming from and with us staying overnight.

Valet is still up in the air.

I recently sold all of my table cameras. The first set because I had too many. The second set because my mom reminded me that at my Sweet Sixteen half of them disappeared and the other half came out crappy.

For us, these are things we are NOT HAVING...of course there are others that I dont feel are necessary but still are having (not much of this though)

No E Party- For us, this just came down to saving a lot of money. We actually preferred not having it even if it wasnt for money...we want to save all the excitement for the wedding.

No Vienniese hour (sp?)- We would have loved it but also too much money. PErsonally, whenever i go to wedding, by the time v-hour is there, Ive already had dessert (the wedding cake and anything on the side of it, fruit, etc.). To us, its nice, but not needed.

Customized things- We are not having a customized aisle runner, i am going to buy different place cards, and table numbers because I dont like the ones my fh gives out but if i liked them, i wouldnt spend extra money on customized ones.

Fresh flowers on the cake- For us, this just wasnt necessary at all.

No next day brunch, etc hosted by bride and groom or family- If we have a close family, I think this would be nice althought not needed. We on the other hand are not close, lol

ETA: I had to add guestbook cuz i just went to a wedding where absolutely noone signed it...when we were leaving cocktail hour, I noticed it on the placecard table and signed it just saying 'love you both' and our names. Then at dinner, the grandmother had picked it up and was passing it around. honestly, jimo, people are just writing whatever well wishes they have already written in their cards and if noone is gonna notice it anyway, then to me, it a waste of moeny.

When it comes down to it, nothing is really 'needed' for a wedding at all, lol. These are all just things that we want. Some people have even done cocktail parties only with passed food and drinks so its all what you can afford and 'want'!

Personalized Napkins, and matches and such. --Very dated IMO
Going crazy on favors - no one really cares anyway
$$$$ BP gifts - they're you're friends, they know your paying for a wedding, so they shouldn't expect extravegant gifts.
Designer wedding day shoes - This was something I wanted soooo bad, but realized the only person who is going to care about that are me, and some of my fashion friends. Its really not worth the money IMO unless you plan on wearing them again.

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Posted by bulldoglover

spending a tremendous amount on favors. majority of people i've spoken to say they usually chuck them in the trash (unless they are edible).

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ita

We did not do E Pics. Since we did not have them our photographer is including extra 8x10 photos for us from the wedding. Also we did not get the photo albums for our parents. Our parents said they would rather just pick which pictures they want to frame. And we eliminated the photo thank you cards.

We did not have an engagement party because we would rather have the money go towards the wedding.

IMO you do not need:

-fancy limos unless it's important for pics
- customized aisle runner
-huge e-party
-favors...i would do a donation instead.
- fancy floral centerpieces...you can save a lot of money by doing candles/candelabras and rose petals
-doc...it's a nice plus but it's not an absolute essential

- Programs: People look at them for 2 secs and for alot of you girls, too much time and effort is spent DIYing them and it really just becomes a waste IMO

- Personalized aisle runner: Use what the hall provides. What are you going to do with this thing after all is said and done. You can't even sell it!

- Guestbooks: I've never signed one and I dont expect others to do this as well. It will be looked at less than you look at your HS yearbook.

- Toasting flutes/cake cutter, etc: Unless these were given as gifts, I dont see them as being necessary.

- Cry packs: Aside from the parents and maybeeee close friends, I think the majority would use them to blow their nose, not wipe their eyes LOL

- Bathroom baskets: Aren't needed, but are def a nice touch if you have the extra time and money to put them together.

- Anything personalized like napkins, matchbooks, etc: They usually aren't cheap and really, the hall has napkins... You dont have to have your names/monograms on EVERYTHING. As for the matchbooks, I see them as necessary only when you are having a cigar roller or handing our cigars.

- DIY Table #'s, placecard frames, etc: Definitely not necessary being that the hall provides all these things. I personally WILL be having them bc I liked the extra touch for my theme.

- Throwing ANYTHING as you walk back down the aisle: Nothing is needed. I primarily bought inexpensive bubbles bc I wanted the effect in pictures. If no one ends up using them, then I eat the $25 I spent on them... no biggie

- DOC: Not needed by any means. This issue can go both ways though. I personally wanted one because I get stressed out very easily and dont want to assign any fam/friends roles for the wedding.

- Limos: Needed for some people, not so much for others...

- Sand/candle/rose ceremonies: Symbolic and cute, but not necessary- esp since the sand containers I bought cost over $50-- just an added expense

- Huge bridal parties: When you add more people into the mix, all it does is create more stress, and drive up costs when you factor in all the gifts you have to buy them, bok's you need to have, hair/mu you need to pay for, etc

*MORE TO COME*

geez..we did alot on this list..but w wanted to to so i say to each his own...u may not like bathroom baskets,but the girl who just got her period might

u may not like slipper baskets but god knows i loved them when i was at a wedding

im just saying some people liked doing all this extra stuff at a wedding..we did..made it personal to us,and i have been to weding where they ddnt do extra stuff and it was amazing as well

do what makes u and ur fh happy

I like hearing everyones opinions... I think the things I am not sure about are limos and placecards, aisle runner, chair covers for ugly reception chairs that don't match anything, and other optional stuff like programs

We saved money on invitations... our friend owns a printing company and don't get me wrong I like them, but they aren't as fancy as most peoples, we r spending like nothing on invites, cuz people throw them away...I never keep an invation. I will keep a copy of mine, but no one else will except maybe each set of parents...

wow this is great
I actually have never been to a wedding with slipper baskets so I will not be doing that, as for bathroom baskets my RH supplies one I will be making one up for the bridal suite for me and my girls, I do think the napkins and match books with our names are a watse of $$ and very 90's and most of my friends have quit smoking (including me) so i dont think anyone would use them except maybe FH ( he needs to quit)
My Rh also has valet parking so I dont need to worry about that. I think with encomny now all brides are going very simple and cutting where they can ( candels instead of flowers, which I will be doing)