My parents have been divorced for about a year or two. They were unhappily married for a long time before my dad ended up moving out and they got divorced. During this time (while they were unhappily married) my dad met a women and started seeing her. My mother found out and it's been a huge thing ever since...
They're still dating 2 years later. My Dad and his gf (a pretty nice lady who's also only a few years older than I am) have since moved in together... Its still a really big thing for my mom though (rightfully so). My mom and Dad's GF have never met.... My dad wants to bring her to the wedding and he's helping us pay for it.... my mother isn't.
What do I do? Anyone else in a similar situation? I don't want the first time they meet to be at my wedding and I do not want a scene at all. Can anyone say awkward???
I don't know if this is a big no-no but its just a thought - why not ask your mom if she plans on inviting 'Mrs.X' to your bridal shower and see how she reacts and take it from there.
IMO Both parties should just put their differences aside for your day. No right or wrong answer here but I think both should attend and both should behave civil to one another....
FutureJOC
Posted:
Member since
Re: Divorced parents - dad's girlfriend....
I am in sort of the same situation. Parents have been separated since I was 12 but only recently decided to make it an official divorce. During the time of separation, my dad has had an on again, off again GF, whom I have never met (nor do I want to) and I also here from my brother and grandmother is a total B. Also, my mother has never been with anyone since my dad and I don't think plans on it (at least not in the immediate future).
I have completely made up my mind that I do not want my dad's GF at the wedding in any way shape or form. It's just going to make my mother very uncomfortable and upset, and it going to end up being a an evening of people whispering 'I can't believe he bought her'.
I haven't discussed this with my father and honestly I don't think that he would even bring her, but it's always a worry in the back of my mind.
The only difference between my situation and yours is my father is not paying for the wedding in any way so pretty much whatever I say goes. And to be honest, if he decides to take it personally or threaten to not even come to the wedding, I will gladly have my brother walk me down the aisle.
I wish you luck.
Scarpak
Posted:
Member since
Re: Divorced parents - dad's girlfriend....
as someone with some experience in this area, i would respectfully ask your father not to bring her. Seeing as how it was an affair type thing, and your mothers whole family will be there, i wouldnt want to embarrass my mother or make her feel awful on my wedding day. HTH
FM if you need to talk
Kat
3rdtimesacharm
Posted:
Member since
Re: Divorced parents - dad's girlfriend....
Yes. It's awkward. But you had nothing to do with the situation. It's a parent's responsibility to behave like adults. Not yours. You are in no way in the middle of this. Send the invitations to both your parents. Address it to each and guest. (Unless one of them is married. ) And that's that. If you're afraid one or both may initiate an issue, advise trusted members of the appropriate side of the family to be on alert. Shame on your parent(s) if they can't behave themselves at your wedding. It's not your problem.
