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Does everyone have to put their 2 cents in? WOW UPDATE

Original post by bride2bebe

First of all- I am still stressed about registering. It was supposed to be something fun and it was at times but I definately DO NOT recommend going with FMIL. That was my mistake because I have a problem saying NO.

Luckily, I was ble to say NO to things she suggested and registered for everything I wanted and loved.

Ugh- Then yesterday...FMIL's best friend calls me up like 'oh you have mistakes on your registry and oh you didn't add this and why would you add that and I want to buy you this, it's not on your registry but what do you think' bla bla bla WHO DOES THAT? I wanted to say- I think it's disgusting and stick to registry but I politely told her to stick to the registry and told FMIL to tell her the same.

This woman had nerve. I show up to work this morning and this woman's younger sister (who's daughter is one of my flowergirls) sent me an email saying 'I heard you found an FG dress' (which I didn't) What about this one, I like it.

The dress was ugly, tacky and cheap looking.
IMO it's not fair to my other FG and my 2 other junior BMs to spend 200$ and for this woman to suggest a 30$ dress.

I also know some people can't afford more but, they can. Otherwise, I wouldn't ask that of anyone.
What nerve do they have to do this?

FH agrees with me and sees they are crossing all kinds of lines with their 'suggestions'

It may not sound so bad but, it is and it's even worse because I have never really had to be so stern about saying NO.

It's just not fair to everyone else in my Bridal Party if I make an exception for these people.


I just found this in my inbox and I am so disgusted at how rude they are being, I can't believe someone can send this email:

About the dress you sent me, I hope you won't get me wrong here but we really don't like it. First the color is too pale, those sleeves like butterfly wings and the thing that goes over it with the flowers looks like an old dress, old fashioned not something for a little pretty girl. Maybe it looks ok without all those things and if the color would be white but I don't want you to waste so much much money on something that won't look good for Giuliana. She never liked flamboyant dresses, she just takes them off! Also, regarding the size please keep in mind that she will definetely grow until August so any fitting is useless at this time, I would most likey go with size 4 toddler.We are going to Europe for 2 months in April so definetely there won't be any time for fitting, honestly everything I buy is

online because I don't have time to go to the stores. I'm sure your time is valuable as well so if you consider that someone else would fit and like this dress I really don't mind at all. We will enjoy anyway your wedding and be a part of it with great love!





littlepixie12 Posted:

Re: Does everyone have to put their 2 cents in? WOW UPDATE

Posted by Suzanner

From that 'woman's' email, I took the following:

She has no idea how weddings work. She has clearly never been invited to be in a bridal party- no wonder, considering her social skills- and completely expected you to purchase the dress for her daughter.

From the last line, it seems to me that she was suggesting that it was best that they not participate in the wedding. I could be wrong, but I think that's what she was saying.

If she doesn't have 'time' to get a dress for your wedding, then obviously it's not a priority for her. I understand our weddings are not as important to other people as they are to us, but at the same time, I don't think it's asking anyone too much to take a few hours out of her life to get a dress for your wedding.

If it's that unimportant, then perhaps her resources would best be spent at home. Her funds, I'm sure, will be very limited after TWO MONTHS in Europe.

But seriously, that dress you chose is absolutely gorgeous. To also say that her daughter should be wearing white is beyond rude. And finally, if she realizes her daughter would just rip the dress off, then why doesn't she get a babysitter and leave her at home?

The dress you chose for the other FG? Nicer than my wedding dress. Both are absolutely stunning. Best of luck- I hope it all works out.


Suz- ITA very well said I also took away that she was hinting that she didnt want her child in the wedding. I dont care if she knew nothing of weddings, nobody assumes that someone else will pay for your clothes. Im sure she knows that she has to go order and pay for the dress. She probably doesnt want to pay for it because she doesnt like it... and if the child will rip the dress off, better off not having her in the wedding... her mother might tell her to do it to spite you. You dont need that.

Let us know what she responds.
kmiller Posted:

Re: Does everyone have to put their 2 cents in? WOW UPDATE

I am always amazed at how truly oblivious people are as to what is appropriate/inappropriate.



I feel your pain because I am a huge people pleaser and I hate confrontation. I would just say if this woman has anything in the future I would just say 'Thanks, I will keep that in mind' and just do what you want
AugustBridein09 Posted:

Re: Does everyone have to put their 2 cents in? WOW UPDATE

Posted by bride2bebe
I have to give credit to AugustBride, she really helped me and basically wrote the entire top portion of the paragraph. She's very good.

Honestly, I am too overwhelmed by her words to have replied back so tactfully.



Aww thanks for the shout out Glad I could help.

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