Does this bother you?

Does it bother you how many women your fiancee has been with. Because even though my mans # isnt THAT high, it still makes me enraged everytime think about it. I need to get over this.

Re: Does this bother you?

Sometimes its hard to get past certian things - even if you are committed to eachother.

There isn't anything he can do about it though, so even though its a problem for you - its something you are going to have to work through I think. Does he know it upsets you.

Re: Does this bother you?

yeah he does. He never ever brings up past relationships. But just sometimes when i am with him i get these stupid thoughts about him and Exes and it makes me so upset. I think this makes me so mad b/c he is the only one I have been with in that way.

Re: Does this bother you?

I have the SAME probelm..... im like jealous of them or something. I knew his last girlfriend.... (as i stole him away from her. ... JK) but the one before that bothers me cuz he was with her for a while.

Re: Does this bother you?

I try not to even think about it. In his most serious relationship, his GF treated him like absolute sh*! . Sometimes I'll get pissed off if I picture him kissing that brat, but it's not healthy to think about it; it's in the past and I know that I treat him better. I'm sure he gets angry if he thinks about me with previous BFs. It's pretty normal to, I suppose.

Re: Does this bother you?

OH and to boot, my FH was engaged once before. He said he was young and stupid. And i believe him. but its still hard to swallow sometimes

Re: Does this bother you?

maybe our FH's had the same EX. lol Yea most of his exes treated him bad too. well i think. they used him for what they could get out of him.

Re: Does this bother you?

Oh - are we talking about the number of ex's... or the ex's in general.

I think its kind of difficult to get past the ex's.. and I know FH is the same way about mine.
Plus - our ex's are always around because of the friends we have - so its hard, but I've found it gets easier -

Re: Does this bother you?

I was originally talking about partners. But exes in general pisses me off too lol

Re: Does this bother you?

does he get jealous of yours? mine does

Re: Does this bother you?

Yea he actually was really good friends with me at the time I was dating one of my exes. HE HATED him and still does. But yeah he gets insecure too i guess. But i think its different for me b/c he is the only one I had sex with. I dunno It didnt bother me when we first started dating. But it bothers me more and more. I guess b/c ( and it sounds corny) but i love him more and more each day

Re: Does this bother you?

Lucky for me I don't have that problem about too many previous women since FH and I been together since we were 16.
I tell ya, catch them when their young.

Re: Does this bother you?

MY FI was married before, very briefly. This is my first marriage. I could make myself crazy thinking about it, but I try not to.

I just hope that some of the magic isn't taken out of this for him. He says this is MUCH different than the last time, yet it still bothers me sometimes. Always has.

I guess the thing that helps me the most is to think of how grateful I am for her being such a complete b****. He appreciates me more because of the way he was treated. He loves me more because he knows what real love is and what it feels like to be loved in return.

BTW, his number is more than thrice mine. (I was in one relationship for 8 years. My courtship with my ex was 3 years longer than his courtship with his ex, their engagement and farce of a marriage combined.)

Re: Does this bother you?

MAC..... he is the only GUY i ever slept with too, so i get jealous of that. ive only really had one other relationship besides him. And he gets jealous over it cuz it happened while we were broken up.

Re: Does this bother you?

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Posted by JLP

MY FI was married before, very briefly. This is my first marriage. I could make myself crazy thinking about it, but I try not to.

I just hope that some of the magic isn't taken out of this for him. He says this is MUCH different than the last time, yet it still bothers me sometimes. Always has.

I guess the thing that helps me the most is to think of how grateful I am for her being such a complete b****. He appreciates me more because of the way he was treated. He loves me more because he knows what real love is and what it feels like to be loved in return.

BTW, his number is more than thrice mine. (I was in one relationship for 8 years. My courtship with my ex was 3 years longer than his courtship with his ex, their engagement and farce of a marriage combined.)

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I'm in a very similar situation. It is VERY DIFFERENT when your FH was married before. It's a much more 'loaded' situation. Even though my FH's ex was a total WACKO he was still married to her. It's like a MIL that's wacko... you still have to respect the situation. My FH doesn't talk badly about her even though he could. and I have to give him a lot of credit for this. I think it speaks highly of his character.

Re: Does this bother you?

my fh has never even kissed anyone other than me

i've often thought about if it would bother me, but it would be hard to imagine because i know the situation like it is now, but i suppose you just have to accept it and get over it...you're going to start a new life together where it's just you and him...just think, there may have been others, but he chose you

Re: Does this bother you?

No for some reason I dont care one bit. I would be more concerned if he wasnt ever with anyone else because what if someday he wanted to know what it was like with someone other than his wife.

Re: Does this bother you?

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Posted by diamondgrlie

No for some reason I dont care one bit. I would be more concerned if he wasnt ever with anyone else because what if someday he wanted to know what it was like with someone other than his wife.

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This is exactly how I feel. I am glad he went out and did what he did and got it 'out of his system' so he can settle down with me.

Re: Does this bother you?

My fh will not talk about past partners with me(believe me I try to get details)
he says the past is the past and we are eachothers future so there is no point to get upset over it.

EW I wanna know but he wont spill and I guess I have to respect that..he also doesnt wanna hear about my past lovers either

Re: Does this bother you?

I think I really could care less about his x GF's and flings. I know how his relationships were with them and type of man he was with them. It's a whole different story, he wouldn't have even thought about putting on a ring on any of their fingers. Which I am sure is the case with most of you, he has chosen you. We are special, we are the women that are going to support our amazing men forever and raise a family with them. That's so much more powerful than any of his past relationships!

And for the ladies that have had men who were married/engaged prior. You should feel even more special, knowing after a bad experience with another woman, he is willing to have forgotten all that and start fresh with you. That itself is romantic. You should be happy your men aren't bitter, unromantic, and hurt from it. They are better men because of those experiences, learned from them, and ready to move on with their #1 lady.