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Wedding Forums > Brides Helping Brides ™ > Does this bother you?
Does this bother you?
CubanBride
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 10:32 AM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 10:32 AM
Re: Does this bother you?
No, it doesn't bother me. I don't think its any of my business. I don't want to know and he doesn't want to know. And that works out perfect for the both of us.
gtsgirl
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 10:35 AM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 10:35 AM
Re: Does this bother you?
Nope..Doesn't bother me a bit..I know he loves me and that's all that really matters at this point
ckgmwedding
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 11:42 AM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 11:42 AM
Re: Does this bother you?
At our ages(over 30) we both have, uh um, been with a few people before eachother. I don't even let myself go there. I hope he doesn't!This is definately something you need to train yourself to get over- you are the one with him now and that is all that matters. You can actually think that over and over in your head when a negative thought about the past woman comes into your head. With some training on your own negative thoughts will pass. Its worth doing since thoughts like this are going to affect your relationship, especially your sexual one.
Sorry, pulling that counselor stuff again. Don't worry, I slapped myself on the wrist. It won't happen again!
buckles
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 01:51 PM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 01:51 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
I used to let that type of thing bother me with my Exs...I would barrage them with with tons of questions. I even did that a bit with my FI when we first started dating, but now I don't. He is with me, he loves me, and things are so great with us in that way. It's funny too because we never really crossed that 'partner path' and I don't know if I want to. All I know is that he is clean and he was a good student along the way and I am the one that benefits from all of it!
JPC1125
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 05:11 PM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 05:11 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
I guess Im lucky cause my guy doesnt have any exesI was his first and only girlfriend- thats what comes along with dating when youre only 16
I feel for all you girls though- Im a good empathizer
amyandeddie
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 06:47 PM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 06:47 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
OMG HOLY CRAP YES! he's been with like triple or more my number and still b!tches about me!
Dooodles
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 06:57 PM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 06:57 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
His past doesn't bother me, I'm only concerned with his future.
becks23
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 07:12 PM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 07:12 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
It honestly never even bothered me....
May05Bride
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 07:13 PM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 07:13 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
for me, no.Whats in the past, is in the past. They are not together for a reason. He loves me
February05
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 07:38 PM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 07:38 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
Posted by Dooodles
His past doesn't bother me, I'm only concerned with his future.
Well said, Donna!
but FH was also the one that taught me to be like this. i have more of a 'past' than he does... but he's fine with that. I'm still friends with ex's and he doesnt have any problem with that either. We know what we have between us, and thats whats important. I think that as long as you have trust, those other things don't matter. Who doesn't have a past? but the fact is- whatever happened in the past, brought us to where we are... and who we are with today. the only thing that will be accomplished by focusing on the past is holding back your happiness for the future.
lolita4life
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 08:13 PM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 08:13 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
i think it bothers me only because i HAVENT been with other people really, and he HAS been, I donyt like that he was in love with other people. I think if i dated more it would be alot different.
Princess047
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 08:39 PM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 08:39 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
If he mentions it it does bother me a little bit but we don't talk about things like that much. We don't usually talk about our past relationships. But I do understand how it can aggravate you - you love him, and it gots to be a bit annoying to hear about another girl.
jesslangen
Posted: Oct 29, 2004 09:10 PM+

Posted: Oct 29, 2004 09:10 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
Past relationships dont really bother me. I guess because they never come around saying 'lets try again' or whatever. None of them are a threat and I guess thats why I dont care. We both did what we had to when we were younger. We lived and learned from those experiences.
akaMrsT
Posted: Oct 31, 2004 11:07 AM+

Posted: Oct 31, 2004 11:07 AM
Re: Does this bother you?
I honestly do now know the exact number of women he has been with but I do not think it's considered high. I know about every woman he has been in a relationship with though - only a few serious ones including me.I could care less about his ex's. I know what kind of man he is and I know that he always treated them well. FI was married briefly when he was 18 and it was annulled. Long story but she said she was pregnant and she was not.
He was with his son's mother for 7 years and they broke up 4 years ago about the time he flushed her engagement ring down the toilet and then sold the house from under her. Another long story but let's just say she really screwed him up for a while and he did not date at all for a couple of years.
Because of the kind of man he is, completely about family and committed even when he's being treated like crap, I know why he got married at 18 and why he nearly married his son's mother. Our situation is totally different - we have no children and I am not pregnant.
Although FI broke it off with his son's mother in June 2000 and was so bitter and upset with all women, he still noticed me at work in July 2000 and tried to get my attention for years. He took the time to make sure he was totally over his horrible relationship.
So, I wrote all of that to say, no it does not bother me that he has been with other women before me. He is not with them now nor does he even want to be friends with any of them.
angelbear217
Posted: Oct 31, 2004 11:34 AM+

Posted: Oct 31, 2004 11:34 AM
Re: Does this bother you?
My Fh's past relationships don't bother me. According to him they were meaningless and he never brings any of them up. Like he's blocked them all from his memory.What does bother me a little though, is that he has slept with more people than me and hooked up a lot with a lot of different people before he met me. I had the college experience too but not as much as he did. So in a sense, I know what you mean. I try to just focus on the future.l
Robinella
Posted: Oct 31, 2004 01:12 PM+

Posted: Oct 31, 2004 01:12 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
It doesnt bother me, cause my fiancee wouldnt be who he is now if he didnt go through all those other girls...he knew they werent what he wanted and I was what he wanted..so in a way im grateful.
Marisa M
Posted: Oct 31, 2004 04:26 PM+

Posted: Oct 31, 2004 04:26 PM
Re: Does this bother you?
I honestly don't care. - Would I want to hang out and have drinks w/ any of these women. - No .....but as long as I don't have to deal w/ them - whatever.Welcome New Vendors
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