Does your FMIL...

Irritate you?

Like, really annoy you with the things she says and does to the point where it's just uncomfortable for you?

Is it just me or do other brides out there feel the same way?

It's just so difficult for me to get past this lately...
it's really bothering me! She wants to make it all about her and I am about to explode!

How do I deal? It's so hard to not blow up!

UMMMM YES!!!
Lmao, I get so annoyed when she says anything to me. lol.

I thought that I was the only one. Hahah

And trust me, I cannot get over it how hard I try.

I understand..it can be so hard joining a family that is very different than your own...I dont have this issue with FMIL but I do with FH's sister. (She's older and her younger brother getting engaged/married first has not been easy for her!)

This is what i've learned to do to cope...it sounds sad but I just try to avoid her...even at family parties I try to be in a different room/area to limit our interactions. The less I'm around her the less opportunity for her to say or do hurtful things, ya know?

Hang in there, the important things is you and FH and it helps if he sees things your way! Hopefully he does!

Oh my goodness- she just made a 'music request' on our wedding website for 'ABBA and Modern Talking' Yea okay- because that's getting played at my wedding!

I want to just freak out on her and tell her she has NO SAY in the music we play....they hardly HARDLY helped with anything for this wedding and somehow I am expected to play her 80's cheese disco music (I like ABBA but, not at my wedding...maybe a sleepover)

I can't even talk to her anymore without my blood boiling!


For the record- FH goes to defend her everytime I try to tell him anything.

On numerous occasions- she has said she has to compete with me on the way she looks the day of the wedding.

She even made a joke she was competing with me on the day of my bridal shower!

My FMIL is trying to step on my moms toes and plan my shower and my mom is soooo territorial about this sort of thing!
I am also worried that FMIL is going to look like a freak at my wedding. She wears the same outfits/outdated dresses all the time and has crappy gross taste.

The problem is I work with my FMIL and she has these annoying quirks. Imagine a person clearing her throat for like 3 seconds straight and being loud about it. Or saying 'Tsk Tsk Tsk' all the effing time! Ugh, there's just so much...

We are all there with you!!

Absolutely.
I came to terms with the fact that in her eyes, no one will ever be good enough for her son, much less me.
I'm not the right religion in her eyes.
I'm not the right race in her eyes.
I'm too independant for her comfort.

But he and I are right for each other.

On the bright side, my parents love him and embrace him as their own son...sometimes I think they like him more than they like me

My FMIL is currently not involved in the wedding whatsoever. (Which irritates FH... not me ) As soon as she found out we were engaged she needed to make it known she was definitely not contributing. She's a very unhappy, by nature, person. Hell, she barely ever smiles. Basically she irritates me but not because she is TOO involved, because she doesn't want anything to do with it at all!

Here is my advise...

DO NOT talk about her to your FH -- trust me this is not a good idea. Yes if she says or does something that is so terrible or hurtful talk to him but if it is just b*tch about her -- use your girlfriends for that.

If she is requesting songs -- pick one and have it played. You are not giving into her but that one small gesture will go a LONG way.

As far as her saying she is competing with you for looks -- well she could come stark naked and nobody would pull their attention away from you the day of.

In my experience people who does this are just jealous and if they try and steal the show usually everyone else sees right through it.

Trust me no one is going to be stealing the spotlight from you that day!

Here's my answer:

I USED to get really upset, because I always wanted an open, great relationship with my future husbands mother.
Unfortunately, she makes that near next to impossible .
I;ve learned to accept her for what she is, not expect anything nice from her, and minimize my time with her.
So far, my stress level has gone way down!!
It's hard, but I'm managing.

She is very judgemental, thrusts unwanted advice and opinions down my throat, extremely intrusive, and LOVES gossip and drama.

All things that I am not.

Fh always says that I am her polar opposite, which is why he;s marrying me.

Hang in there!!

Oh, and I can;t be around her when I am PMS'ing, because I am afriad for her....LOL.. no joke.

ITA with you!!!

I have not figured out what to do yet but I do not suggest lol good luck!

Oh ladies- I feel like she is just out to get to me and seriously, this is taking a toll on my patience!!!

I know no one could steal the spotlight from me on my wedding day and that's not my concern...I just don't know how she has the gall to say that!
It hurts me and what's even worse is that- she is no help with anything and still has the nerve to critique things!

FH thinks I'm being a beach because I'm not grateful....yada yada yada. He always says 'I know my mom is a difficult woman but she always means well'

uh uh.

She does not mean well. I don't want to be her best friend...I just have to stomach her.
I dont even want to got o his house- ugh.

My FILS told me and FH that the wedding/engagment had nothing to do about either one of us yet it had to do with their family. I know how you feel...what I think about that is that the FILs will look redic and sound redic to everyone else!

Everyone will know it is your day...you are the

i feel your pain. my fmil has a mouth. she is nice and means well but she is a complainer. and the worse part is....she doesnt even know she does it! in any situation no matter how nice/great, she will always find something wrong and keeps bringing it up until it bothers just about everyone. and no one says anything!!!! i seriously think that its not my place to say anything cause i'm technically not a blood relative. FH should handle those things....i seriously love him to death but sometimes i wonder how i am going to put up with her crap when we are married.

plus i love how she is trying to out do me on the wedding. she was the one who went on and on about how people shouldnt wear black to a wedding and guess what her dress color is?! and it has alot of silver sequence on top. she looks like a freaking strobe light! i just dont know what i am going to do.

Oh, I totally feel your pain! Mine annoys the cr@p out of me! But even her own family has told me she is just a mean and nasty woman! Oh, the stories I could tell and we aren't even married yet!

Ignore her, as my mom says to me, people only have as much power as you give them. I need to take that advice myself, cause everytime i'm near her, she does something to make my blood boil!

I can't belive yours said she is competeing with you!!!! How could she compete with the bride and why would she want too? That's just sick in my opinion. Hang in there, there are a bunch of us on here that have FMIL's from H@ll!

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Posted by Mrs Z To Be

Here's my answer:

I USED to get really upset, because I always wanted an open, great relationship with my future husbands mother.
Unfortunately, she makes that near next to impossible .
I;ve learned to accept her for what she is, not expect anything nice from her, and minimize my time with her.
So far, my stress level has gone way down!!
It's hard, but I'm managing.

She is very judgemental, thrusts unwanted advice and opinions down my throat, extremely intrusive, and LOVES gossip and drama.

All things that I am not.

Fh always says that I am her polar opposite, which is why he;s marrying me.

Hang in there!!

Oh, and I can;t be around her when I am PMS'ing, because I am afriad for her....LOL.. no joke.

---

I would say we have the same FMIL, but FH is an only child!

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Posted by MrsBlueRibbon

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Posted by Mrs Z To Be

Here's my answer:

I USED to get really upset, because I always wanted an open, great relationship with my future husbands mother.
Unfortunately, she makes that near next to impossible .
I;ve learned to accept her for what she is, not expect anything nice from her, and minimize my time with her.
So far, my stress level has gone way down!!
It's hard, but I'm managing.

She is very judgemental, thrusts unwanted advice and opinions down my throat, extremely intrusive, and LOVES gossip and drama.

All things that I am not.

Fh always says that I am her polar opposite, which is why he;s marrying me.

Hang in there!!

Oh, and I can;t be around her when I am PMS'ing, because I am afriad for her....LOL.. no joke.

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I would say we have the same FMIL, but FH is an only child!

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My FH is an ONLY CHILD too!

It's the worst- he is spoiled and she thinks for him.

We are 2 months from the wedding and I am ready to just go postal!!!!

MY FH IS ALSO AN ONLY CHILD!!! Maybe there is a trend??

Also just found out tonight that I will be spending the day that was supposed to be our eparty (cancled bc the FILS caused so much drama and greef) with the FILS....:

I was already laughing and agreeing before opening this post!!!