My fiancee and I are planning an engagement party at KOC in Seaford for March 2014. We are going tonight to see the place and talk about dates with a coordinater, so I needed to finalize our list. After adding his list to mine, we have 165 people!! I feel at this rate we might as well add the rest and have our wedding!! I have mostly family so it's difficult for me to cut my list, while he has a lot of close friends. How many is average for an engagement? I'm figuring we'll be paying at least 35/plate there, which is over 5500 just for an E-party!! I'm having a meltdown! HELP!!
fdnybride163
Posted:
Member since
Re: Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
we invited about 70 and 50 showed... just a party in the backyard... 165 is crazy! you dont have to have every single person in your fmaily... just do immediate, and people you are close with ( and close i mean people you talk to on a weekly if not daily basis)
lauren1802
Posted:
Member since
Re: Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
Posted by vppjzv
Yikes. It's for 2014? Maybe your gust list will change by then?
We had 60 people, no friends really. Just bridal party, immediate family, aunts, uncles and first cousins. Had to cut it somewhere.
THIS! and we had it at FW's familys house
db276952
Posted:
Member since
Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
We had about 120, we did it in the yard with tents and band. My mom actaully did most of the cooking herself (she is crazy lol).
JojoBride
Posted:
Member since
Re: Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
Posted by vppjzv
Yikes. It's for 2014? Maybe your gust list will change by then?
We had 60 people, no friends really. Just bridal party, immediate family, aunts, uncles and first cousins. Had to cut it somewhere.
I agree this is what we did....except we eliminated aunts, uncles and cousins...did parents, siblings, grandparents and bridal party...that came out to a little over 50 when you calculate everyones significant other too...
My e-party original list was up to 175! We had to cut it somewhere because its not a wedding...dont feel bad if you need to cut most family too!
JojoBride
Posted:
Member since
Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
NWR: Bride2Be I love those shoes you have for your default pic!
FH and I just had a small gathering at his parent's house with just immediate family. My mom asked me if I wanted to have a formal engagement party, but I'd rather save the money for the wedding. We celebrated with the most important people to us, so that was enough.
devsings
Posted:
Member since
Re: Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
We had immediate family/aunts/uncles/some cousins/some bridal party in my Dad's backyard - I'd say it was around 50-55 people. We barbecued, drank, and casually chatted. No need for a big to-do; then what will your guests expect for the wedding? Don't make it so you have to 'out-do' yourself. Keep it simple - save your money and time (and hours of planning) for the wedding itself!
Kris10nGerard
Posted:
Member since
Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
We invited 115 for our engagement party and had 92 people there. My parents paid for a nice chunk of it though. That is small for us because we are inviting 255 for our wedding. It really is up to you and what you want.
adele and mark 2013
Posted:
Member since
Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
I feel your pain. We invited about 150 people and I thought it was insane. By the time the RSVP date came, we had about 85-90 total. In many cases, I think the number is like 30% of your guest list will reply 'no'. I could be very wrong about that percentage but that was the case with me. Also, some people won't come to your engagement party but will come to your wedding. When you say $35/ head does that mean they are catering it? I used Piccolo in Bellmore to cater my engagement party for a great price. Just remember to breathe and try to enjoy the process.
RoandJoe
Posted:
Member since
Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
Thanks everyone--I think we might stick with what we have and see what the price is. If anything, might just cut down to JUST family and bridal party
Nichelmus
Posted:
Member since
Re: Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
We had about 100 it was expensive but we had a lot of fun.
MrsDtoBe
Posted:
Member since
Re: Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
We're having the same problem! I'm from a HUGE family and our list had about 150 people AFTER cutting it down (without kids). The max allowed at our hall is 120, so making that work was nearly impossible.
I would just try to write a list of the family/friends you would see somewhat often throughout the year. Keep in mind that if you invite them to the engagement party, you have to invite them to the wedding - so make sure they're all perm. people in your lives. We didn't invite any co-workers because we figured that on the off-chance either one of us changed job locations and didn't keep in close contact with them, we didn't want to feel pressured to invite them to the wedding after not speaking to them for an extended period of time.
Try not to stress it, at the end of the day this party is about you two, and you will have an amazing time regardless of who is there!! Good luck!!
Serenalee13
Posted:
Member since
Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
I didn't have an engagement party but if I did it would have been only close family/bridal party.
cj52514
Posted:
Member since
Re: Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
Posted by hedwards0524
Posted by KDNY133
I skipped this all together...saved the party for my wedding...
This
Same. I also didn't have an e-party.
Ceyli1027
Posted:
Member since
Re: Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
Posted by KDNY133
I skipped this all together...saved the party for my wedding...
This! Save the money and to splurge on a dream item for your wedding.
futurearias
Posted:
Member since
Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
i agree, might as well have your wedding!
Sabellabride12
Posted:
Member since
Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
My FH dad and step mom just threw us an E party last Saturday but if they had offerednnot we could not have afforded to give ourselves one. I agree that after you add up all the costs that it would be counter productive for saving for the wedding because it is all so expensive, but if you have the money it is a great way to celebrate. We invited 116, and about 85 people came. People are going to say no and things will come up, like my cousin breaking his jaw the night before and that whole family wasn't able to come because they were in the hospital.
It was in their backyard in Westchester but they did it beautifully with a tent and renting linens and had it catered. I had such a great time, I kept saying we should have invited more people got a floor for the tent and just got married that day lol I can't believe its over already!
Sabellabride12
Posted:
Member since
Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
Oh and we only had 5 friends there the rest were all family. I would've loved to have more friends but we were originally only supposed to have 50 people total and after the list got out of hand with just family I couldn't add any more friends.
nancy6485
Posted:
Member since
Re: Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
no engagement party for us! we wanted to save for the wedding; plus, we live OOS now and no one has engagement parties. FH's family would think we were crazy.
Shanti12
Posted:
Member since
Re: Enagement Party Meltdown--how many is too many?
I also skipped this. We had a housewarming though and I specifically invited bridal party, a FEW other close friends that aren't BP and then family. Because it was a backyard BBQ people brought guests I didn't know about, other people got added to the list last minute but with the people who responded No it averaged out around 30 people there at once which was perfect. Not a lot of family travelled and I knew they wouldn't because I said the same thing - if we invite everyone we may as well just have the wedding! Plus... yeah, my mom cooked, FHs mom cooked and I cooked and it didn't cost TOO much.
