Does anyone know the etiquette regarding-- if you have to invite the Officiant to the reception when you are having the ceremony at the same place?
M&LSept1606
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I don't think you have to. We are not.
Boston&NY2006
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The officiant should be invited to the reception just like a regular guest. You should send them an invitation, and then it's up to them iuf they want to attend or not.
It's important to remember that the officiant is not a 'vendor.' If this is the person you've chosen to perform the most important ceremony of your life, I would assume that you like them and resepct them enough to invite them to your wedding....
Soccer_Girl
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Our rabbi's fee is $750. I am not inviting him to the wedding - I have only met him once (although we will meet one more time before the wedding). I would have loved to have my rabbi perform the service but he does not do interfaith marriages.
EmberLynn
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I really like my officiant, so I invited her to my E-party, she couldn't make it, but I'm also inviting her to the wedding too. Its really your choice. If you like the officiant then please do, but he or she may have to go to another wedding. But in all honestly put ettiquette aside and do what you want to do. Its your wedding!
ElegantBride
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We are inviting our priest.
FallBride05
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Our Rabbi is invited to the wedding (but we're also known him for 20 years!).
palebride
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We invited him and his wife but they chose not to come
july06bride
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we are invitinf priest, he has seen me grow up...he will definetely come , he loves a good party!
1005bride
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Yes, we are inviting our priest to the reception. If you are having the ceremony at the same place as the reception, then it is the right thing to invite the officiant to the reception.
boobobunny
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I invited the officiant to the reception...but he can only stay through the cocktail hr. I think that if you get to know the officiant you should ask them to the reception....but if not its not necessary.
Soccer_Girl
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If you are having the ceremony at the same place as the reception, then it is the right thing to invite the officiant to the reception.
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'the right thing'... I think we are all here to get others' opinions... I don't think it's right to say what is the 'right thing'... aren't we doing what we feel is right for us?
If we are inviting our officiant then we may think it's right... if we are not...then we think that is the right thing...
Please give opinions... don't judge others who believe differently...
(just get frustrated when people say what they are going is 'right' instead of 'right for them.'
.... and sorry for the rant...
1005bride
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Posted by coopersmom
If you are having the ceremony at the same place as the reception, then it is the right thing to invite the officiant to the reception.
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'the right thing'... I think we are all here to get others' opinions... I don't think it's right to say what is the 'right thing'... aren't we doing what we feel is right for us?
If we are inviting our officiant then we may think it's right... if we are not...then we think that is the right thing...
Please give opinions... don't judge others who believe differently...
(just get frustrated when people say what they are going is 'right' instead of 'right for them.'
.... and sorry for the rant...
Sorry, I didn't mean to offend anyone nor was I judging anyone. She asked about the 'etiquette' regarding inviting the officiant. After researching this topic, that is the 'right thing to do' in terms of etiquette.
Obviously there is no 'right thing' for everyone and I was not suggesting that there is.
Johnny&Maur
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Re: Feeding the Officiant??
Posted by coopersmom
If you are having the ceremony at the same place as the reception, then it is the right thing to invite the officiant to the reception.
_____________________________________
'the right thing'... I think we are all here to get others' opinions... I don't think it's right to say what is the 'right thing'... aren't we doing what we feel is right for us?
If we are inviting our officiant then we may think it's right... if we are not...then we think that is the right thing...
Please give opinions... don't judge others who believe differently...
(just get frustrated when people say what they are going is 'right' instead of 'right for them.'
.... and sorry for the rant...
I don't think this poster was being judgemental. People say all the time 'its the right thing to do' but you don't have to believe it if you don't want to. I happen to agree with what was said..I couldn't imagine not inviting the officiant. I don't know whether I feel its more of an etiquette thing...or a respect thing....but I think of all the guests i invited because it was either my moms friend, a distant cousin i felt obligated too...I mean the officiant is usually one single person and a lot of times decline. I think its more a nice touch to invite them.
Like someone else on here said..they are only performing the most sacred sacrament/service/ceremony or whatever you call it!
nferrandi
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Re: Feeding the Officiant??
In all fairness, many people are not married by their family priest or rabbi, so that does make the officiant a 'vendor' and not that much else. We paid $750 in order to find a priest and rabbi that would marry us at our hall and I met each of them once. I didn't feel any need to extend them an invitation to my reception. I spent a lot more time dealing with my florist and I didn't invite her either.
Nadia
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Re: Feeding the Officiant??
Posted by nferrandi
In all fairness, many people are not married by their family priest or rabbi, so that does make the officiant a 'vendor' and not that much else. We paid $750 in order to find a priest and rabbi that would marry us at our hall and I met each of them once. I didn't feel any need to extend them an invitation to my reception. I spent a lot more time dealing with my florist and I didn't invite her either.
I agree with you
Jajanyc
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Thanks for all the feedback ladies......It's been helpful in making my decision as to what is 'right' for me and my wedding. Everyone has a good point in either inviting the officiant or not to the reception or the cocktail hour. It boils down to a personal choice and what you feel most comfortable with.
If anyone wants to know...I've decided that I will not feel obligated to invite the officiant to my reception. I have no personal relationship with them and have hired their services to perform their task. I hope that they would be professional about it and know that they have been compensated for their services.
ssdbk
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We asked our Rabbi straight out whether he would like to be invited. He insisted that he would just like to have a toast with us during the CH and then be on his way.
jantany26
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We are not, it's someone that we are hiring and that's the minister for the church. Is not like I have known him for ever but yet again it's a personal decision.
PinkSoil
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Re: Feeding the Officiant??
Posted by coopersmom
Our rabbi's fee is $750. I am not inviting him to the wedding - I have only met him once (although we will meet one more time before the wedding). I would have loved to have my rabbi perform the service but he does not do interfaith marriages.
I have met my Rabbi once and that was only because he is doing the ceremony. The Rabbi costs $550, the Reverend costs $200. The first time we are ever meeting the Reverend will be at the wedding. I'm sorry but they will have to leave after their services.
