Re: FH is really making me upset...

I'm so sorry I think a lot of us girls have similar things going on...

my FH doesn't want to wear all white and that is okay with me, as long as he is different from his groosmen.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

I had DH in ivory vest and tie with white shirt. I guess I just felt like it would match me and set him apart from GM's. It's his wedding, he should want to wear it. Try showing him pictures and maybe he'll change his mind. But don't fight too much about it, you'll have bigger fish to fry.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

Knowing how men are, he probably heard the word ivory and thought it sounds gay or something. He's probably very confused. Show him the difference and tell him ivory is the feminine version of white.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

what I did was bring a swatch of my dress to the store. and THANK GOD we did. Ivory was too dark and white made the swatch look dirty. my dress was ivory as well, but not really a true ivory. we found the perfect shade of shirt.

IMO, wait till you can get a swatch of your dress. maybe if your FH sees them next to each other, he will change his mind.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

I really think you should let him wear what he wants, within reason of course. Is this really how you want to start you married life off? I promise you no one is going to notice. How could they...they'll all be looking at you!!

Re: FH is really making me upset...

and in no way will your dress look dingy b/c he's in a white shirt! the only time wedding dresses look dingy is when they are really old and not properly stored, they age and yellow.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

Guys don't get it. DH likes to tell me he only sees 16 colors and ivory isn't one of them.

On that note, I would let him wear whatever he wants. You got to choose your dress, let him choose what he wants to wear. It's his day too. This is too small an issue to be fighting about.

I would let it rest for a few days/weeks and go back to the tux place again. I'm sure that with the a little space, you will be able to come to a compromise.

Good luck.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

Maybe you can go back and wear an ivory shirt . Let him try the tux outfit on in white and ivory and show him the difference and how it reflects your dress color. Maybe once he sees how it will look, he will have a change of heart.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

I would let things cool off for a little. (since you have time) In a week or two bring it up and explain to him why it's so important to you that he wear ivory.
You could even ask him to tyr it on (for you) and if he does not like it then you can work from there.
This usually works for me.
Good Luck!

Re: FH is really making me upset...

It is very hard to say what the human eye picks up versus the light of a camera. We were asked, in the tux shop, what color my dress was and when I said off-white-, the tux person immediately said that the groom should wear an off white (which is not as yellow as ivory) shirt. He said that people may not see things in person but when those lights are reflectors are on you, they appear as different casts of white in pictures. DH wanted to wear an off white vest and tie to set himself apart from the rest of the BP because just as a bride is set apart from all ladies, a groom deserves the right to be set apart from his groomsmen who woreoff white shirts with the same vests and ties as DH but in black.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

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Posted by hmm8191

I really think you should let him wear what he wants, within reason of course. Is this really how you want to start you married life off? I promise you no one is going to notice. How could they...they'll all be looking at you!!

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I agree. Of course, you could always order him the ivory shirt and tell him it's 'off-white'.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

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Posted by Jen&Chris06

I would let things cool off for a little. (since you have time) In a week or two bring it up and explain to him why it's so important to you that he wear ivory.
You could even ask him to tyr it on (for you) and if he does not like it then you can work from there.
This usually works for me.
Good Luck!

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Totally agree..let it cool down a bit before you bring it up again. Like Jen said you have time, BUT
as laid back as I am I have to side with you. I plan on having an ivory dress and one of the first questions our photographer asked was what my dress color was. When I said ivory he told FH to make sure he gets an ivory shirt no white or diamond white bc it will throw the coloring of the pics off. Things will look sloppy/mismatched.

Good luck!

Re: FH is really making me upset...

What about if he wore silver, that is what my husband did & it looked better than the white he was going to wear.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

Honestly, white WILL look off next to your dress, so I wouldn't even discuss it with him, I would just call the tux place after he picks one out and make them give FH and all the guys ivory shirts. I guarantee you he will not know the difference. I'm not the type of person who would condone going behind someone's back, but for somethign so stupid that really will make a difference, I think it's perfectly warranted. I didn't even discuss this with my husband before hand, I just told the woman that wrote out the orders, 'Oh, btw, my dress is ivory, so they'll need ivory shirts, not white.' He totally didn't even realize that he had ivory on the day of our wedding until I told him. Here's a pic. I'd be surprised if your FH could tell the difference, either. He's probably just feeling like he has no control. Men!

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Re: FH is really making me upset...

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Posted by nferrandi

Dh didn't want to wear an ivory shirt at first either, but you know what, he wouldn't have even known it was ivory if he didn't actually 'know.'

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You are so right Nicole, if it was never mentioned, they would have no clue......

Dress twin!

Re: FH is really making me upset...

I wouldn't stress too much. FH picked out tuxes in December. The store closed so we went someplace else last week. Completely changed EVERYTHING!!

Next time you go, bring a fabric swatch from your dress and ask the tux shop to match it.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

sorry, but I have to say this. I hear a lot of 'its your day, your way', etc, but its also your FH's day. I dont think you shoud force him to wear something he doesnt want to wear! if he doesnt like ivory, dont do ivory. I really don't think its fair for this thing to be ones-sided.

compromise and find something that isnt white or ivory. tell him white won't go with your dress, but if he's really anti-ivory, how about grey or some other color.

Re: FH is really making me upset...

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Posted by csorisi

What about if he wore silver, that is what my husband did & it looked better than the white he was going to wear.

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silver is a good alternative

Re: FH is really making me upset...

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Posted by ellebelle1

Knowing how men are, he probably heard the word ivory and thought it sounds gay or something. He's probably very confused. Show him the difference and tell him ivory is the feminine version of white.

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That's hilarious! But probably very true!

Re: FH is really making me upset...

my dress is ivory and his shirts are all white...im not a fan of ivory shirts...as for the vests im sure you can compromise..what bout silver and black or 'platinum' ?

he can wear platinum tie and vest- the guys wear black vest adn platinum tie..

they dont have to match the bridesmaids...as long as they dont blatently clash its fine (like red or something)

dont fight with him over it...


fyi- my fh picked out Canary yellow vests and ties go go with my green and pink theme...but w changed them easily...so it ants a big deal (fmil had to do with that one )