Fights w/ FH

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You have to pick and choose your battles. If it's something stupid, I apologize even if I think I'm right. It's not worth it.

Sorry you guys are fighting. I hate fighting with my FH...

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We generally do pick and choose our battles and we both picked this one! I've been so overtired & cranky (and it's not even PMS!!!). The sleepless nights worring about the wedding plans mainly, have worn me down.

We've already apologized we're just bothered by the arguement I guess.

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Posted by LuvMyAlfonse

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Posted by Madorie

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do you live together?

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We do...for a few years now.

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Some people fight and then don't talk - give the silent treatment and whatnot...

It's just stubbornness. Even if it's not your fault, apologize... You have to pick and choose your battles. If it's something stupid, I apologize even if I think I'm right. It's not worth it.

Sorry you guys are fighting. I hate fighting with my FH...

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I agree, just talk it out...Even when im mad at him i make sure to say ok lets just talk it out and find a solution...I tell him i dont care about who is right or who is wrong right now, all i care about is resolving the issue. Me being right or him being right wont get us anywhere...I can be right but miserable at the same time if im not even talking to FH...so i try to let go of the power trip and just let out our feelings and get to a resolution

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Posted by MrsDtoBe
Other than those bickers, we aren't fighters.

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Same here which is why I HATE the bigger fights/arguements.

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Posted by Madorie

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Posted by MrsDtoBe
Other than those bickers, we aren't fighters.

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Same here which is why I HATE the bigger fights/arguements.

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i would just call/text/email whatever and say listen i dont want to fight, i just want to talk things on and move past this

We bicker quite often -
big fights, not so much
But, when we do, it's gotten better - rather than screaming and stuff, we just ignore each other (actually I ignore him) until he apologizes, haha
I'm NEVER wrong

Sorry you guys are having a spat right now...but one thing stood out to me in your post...that its, the same fight every so often, maybe it's a topic you want to talk over with a third person like your priest, rabi (whichever applies) sometimes a nonbias third party can bring in fresh insite & new points that we don't hear bc hey we've been having the same fight. I did this with a recurring arguement and it worked, thankfully~

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Posted by florezpeeps

Sorry you guys are having a spat right now...but one thing stood out to me in your post...that its, the same fight every so often, maybe it's a topic you want to talk over with a third person like your priest, rabi (whichever applies) sometimes a nonbias third party can bring in fresh insite & new points that we don't hear bc hey we've been having the same fight. I did this with a recurring arguement and it worked, thankfully~

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good point

We have a 'tiff' once every two weeks over the remote, where to go to dinner, etc...

We have a good fight where once of us has to apologize about once a month

They are never over anything big, but sometimes we just get under each other's skin.

I have never fought with FH where I didn't talk to him... ok maybe for 2 minutes but not more than that. And I'll admit our agruments are usually the same thing but nothing either of us would ever consider breaking up the relationship over.

If the two of you are getting this upset maybe it's time to have a chat, re-evaluate the situation and possibly just let it go. You can't change him, just like he can't change you. But you should be able to respect these differences if you love each other.

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Posted by florezpeeps

Sorry you guys are having a spat right now...but one thing stood out to me in your post...that its, the same fight every so often, maybe it's a topic you want to talk over with a third person like your priest, rabi (whichever applies) sometimes a nonbias third party can bring in fresh insite & new points that we don't hear bc hey we've been having the same fight. I did this with a recurring arguement and it worked, thankfully~

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I'm open to it. FH...not so much.

One good recommendation I got was that never go to bed angry, always try to resolve the problem before going to sleep.

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Posted by Madorie

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Posted by florezpeeps

Sorry you guys are having a spat right now...but one thing stood out to me in your post...that its, the same fight every so often, maybe it's a topic you want to talk over with a third person like your priest, rabi (whichever applies) sometimes a nonbias third party can bring in fresh insite & new points that we don't hear bc hey we've been having the same fight. I did this with a recurring arguement and it worked, thankfully~

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I'm open to it. FH...not so much.

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LOL!, my fh isn't open to that kinda stuff either, i kinda through it on him when i just happened to bring it up in front of our minister that 'hey ummm, we always have the same problem, tell me what you think about...' & aha Got him!

we bicker all the time and WHATEVER each other... (lol)

but I TRY not to do the silent treatment thing b/c nothing gets accomplished. Usually I'm honest with him about how I feel, let him marinate in it etc etc.

and vice versa of course.... when we realize we can't reach an agreement we'll just leave each other alone to cool off usually we're both apologizing to each other within an hour or so..

I guess I'm lucky in that while we both can be EXTREMELY stubborn, we're both objective as well.

then again, we're both in our thirties...

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LOL!, my fh isn't open to that kinda stuff either, i kinda through it on him when i just happened to bring it up in front of our minister that 'hey ummm, we always have the same problem, tell me what you think about...' & aha Got him!

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brilliant

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Posted by MrsDtoBe

Thankfully our 'fights', if that's what you want to even call them, come from the fact that both of us are extremely indecisive! Where to go, eat, drink, sit, stand....etc....Other than those bickers, we aren't fighters.

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Thats the exact same with Fh and myself. Everynight we argue over what to have for dinner..its the most ridiculous thing but he can never make a decision. Always leaves it up to me, and I'm glad he cares about what I think but give me a break already and just tell me what YOU want! Up until the point we got engaged we never ever fought, all of a sudden when it came down to picking the place, whether or not to have an eparty, who to invite etc..we've had some pretty big ones. But we know when to stop and just talk it out and things get better. He knows once I reach a point of being so completely angry, I'll just lose it. So he tries so hard not to get me to that point..i'm quite the yeller lol but I'm good with him. hes a sweetheart and doesnt mean any harm to anyone

same here, it's usually him saying ' why do you keep hiding the remote?'