So my fiance has 2 little girl cousins who are sisters. We are definitely having the 5 year old as our flower girl. We are not having a ring bearer. I think we should have both sisters as our flower girls. My fiance and his mother disagree - they think that the other sister is too young (she will be a month away from 3 years old when we get married) and won't behvae. I don't think she is too young, especially since she will have her sister to walk down the aisle with. I also think it's rude to ask his cousin to have one of her daughters as out flower girl and not the other. Maybe that's because my sister and I are only one year apart and we never did anything separately lol. Anyway, I don't want to create a problem but I really want to have them both in our wedding party. Just wondering your girls' advice. Am I being difficult? TIA!
asg450
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Re: Flower girl dilemma
No you're not being difficult. My flower girl is 2 now and will be 3 years old at the time of our wedding. My ring bearer will be 2 months shy of his 3rd birthday.
I agree with you that if she walks down with her older sister she should be fine. And it would be very cute if both of them were flower girls.
coachgirl07
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I'm planning my wedding for July 2010 and today is my flower girls 1st birthday. 3 years old is probably fine. If she gets too nervous on the wedding day, she won't walk down the aisle, you will still have a flower girl.
susanafernandes82
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its your wedding do what you want. ihaving 3 flowers girl. one 3 the other 5 and the lil one is just 2 and im training them all now how to toss the flowers and walk down the alsie. but hey if they dont walk down the day of no biggie it happens. at least thier lot beautiful in thier dresses
MrsL2010
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I don't see anything wrong with having them both. My cousins were 4 1/2 and 3 months shy of 3 years old when they were flower girl and ring bearer in my aunts wedding. the flower girl was the 4 1/2 year old and she was good, they bribed the ring bearer with a toy at the end of the aisle. maybe you could do that?
jlt2010
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i think she'll be fine at 3 years old to be your flower girl. and she'll have her older sister with her to keep her comfortable.
springsandra
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Our RB is 3 1/2 and our FG (his sister) will be about 15 months at our wedding. She's not really a 'flower girl' in the sense that she'll be carrying a basket and throwing flowers, but she'll walk down the aisle and look adorable.
Tell them she doesn't have to actually throw flowers, just walk with her sister. It'll be adorable and wonderful.
CDC2010
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Thanks for all of your good advice. I really don't think she'll be too young. My fiance's mother is so against it for some reason though. She says it's just her opinion and it's up to me and my fiance but I still don't want to create any issues before we even get married. Ughh, I really don't know what to do!
Lsorrent
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MY FG will be about 2 1/2 for my wedding. I don't think she's too young at all. My church doesn't allow petals thrown anyhow, so that's not an issue for me. I'm just going to have a kissing ball made for her.
cavvento
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I was the wedding coordinator at a chapel for three years, and I would say that based on experience, it all depends on how flexible you are. There's a chance she might not make it down the aisle, or a chance she may start to run or cry halfway down, or something like that. When I was a flower girl at age 3, I stopped halfway down and yelled out, 'HI ANNETTE!' to my cousin sitting in a pew!
I'm a big believer in having the kids participate, send them up the aisle in good faith, and whatever happens is part of the natural charm of having kids in the wedding. That's what I'll be doing with my young nephews.
However, if you have the need for everything to be 'perfect' , then I would say to have the younger one at the church for photos but not go up the aisle.
I think a 3 year old though should generally understand what to do, espeically if she could hold her sister's hand.
FutureMrsG
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One of my flower girls will be about 2 and a half at my wedding and I do not think that is too young.
Cassie15
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I had two FG, one from DH's family and the other was a friend's daughter for my wedding, both were 5 yrs old. I thought it would be cute for both girls to hold hands together down the aisle so they would not get intimidated. Unfortunately, one of the FG's grandfather passed away the night before my wedding and could not attend. To my amazement, the FG from DH's family was very calm and collected, a bit shy when family members waved to her and smiled during the ceremony but she was amazing. So don't worry about the age as a factor, esp if you had a prep talk or rehearsal with them. And since you mention the older sister will be walking with her down the aisle, it will be fine. If you're worried about the girl making noises or fidgeting, give her a flower basket or something to hold onto during the ceremony. I def think that both girls should be included or the other one will feel left out.
JAAMS
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You should just ask both of them if that is what you want to do. My RB is going to be 2.5 and my pages are going to be 3.5 & 4.5. The worst that can happen is day of, she decides she doesn't want to walk down the aisle and then just the 5 yr old goes.
emc282rjm
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I think you should ask them both--the little girl that you don't ask will feel left out (and might act out) if you don't ask her.
MrsCM
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I don't think she is too young.
Our flower girl will be 16 months at our wedding so we are just kind of giving her a little pomander to hold and putting a lei on her and some flowers in her hair and someone is holding her hand and walking her down the aisle.
IrishBride1109
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I actually have more kids in my wedding party than adults. The thing I have committed to is being very flexible. Whoever wants to walk down the aisle that day will. And whoever doesn't want to, doesn't have to. I'm not forcing pictures and I understand that they may cooperate and they may not. Whatever pics happen I'll be happy with. They are such an important part of my life and so excited to be in the wedding that I can't imagine them not being a part of it. I just knew I had to adjust my expectations.
That being said, I think especially since her sister is going to be a FG the little one will be just fine. But you know in your heart what you want to do. I think you should go with that.
runnerbride1023
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I think you are right and should ask them both!
A few years ago I went to my FBILs wedding and his nephew was the ring bearer and on the way down the aisle he screamed 'JOEY!' (his dad). It was really cute and we all still have that memory 6 years later.
I'm sure they will be really cute and (close to) perfect. Plus her older sister can walk down the aisle with her and im sure the little one will be totally fine.
mrsjpc3
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i think those ages are more than appropriate. I had 3 FG's. One was DH's neice who was 5. I also asked my 2 nieces (who are sisters) who were almost 3 and almost 5. they were excellent. they all held hands and walked down the aisle. do what you want, it's your day,,, remember that.
here they are. the little one was fussy for pics afterwards, but she was great in the church.
JAAMS
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What a cute pic of the FGs mrsjpc!
Julia0927
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I think you are right. She should be fine with her sister.
