Found my ex's Knot page!

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Posted by PegaLega

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Posted by AmorPeruano

I actually think your post is refreshing and candid and honest, and I love that. Sometimes people can act like they're 100% non-affected by a past experience or past relationship, but thats not always the case.

You are who you are today b/c of what you've been through in the past, and your ex was part of that. It's okay to still be a lil curious and to care what happened to that piece of your life, just as long as you feel strong and steady and happy in the relationship you are in now.

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Could not have said it better.
I have run into my ex-and not really had feelings of sadness but more wonder. I dont think he is a bad person, we just grew apart. Do i want him to be happy in life of course-do I wonder if he is? Yes, but does that mean that I dont LOVE DH-NO! It just makes me realize more that us going our seperate ways was what needed to happen.
Regardless-im sure that there is a part of you that hasnt gotten closure or the 'knowledge' of what happened-and that probably why your emotions are the way that they are

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100% agreed :)

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Posted by blurgirlny

I know you all must think I'm a freak for looking, but my college boyfriend (of 4 years) was like my 'soul mate' to me - I was devastated when he dumped me. I sometimes thought if he ever got back in touch w/me, I'd drop my bf at that time and be w/him again. I know that sounds bad.

Anyway, one day I was bored and started entering all these old friends names into The Knot's search for a couple's page thingie. Well, to my SHOCK, I found his page on there and on Wedding Channel.

For some reason, I kept thinking about him all day. I can't believe I even care, I have my own guy and we're getting married.

Has anyone ever felt a tinge of sadness upon finding out their ex got married?

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I'm not quite sure that you are ready to marry your FH if you are feeling this way. I am by no means a counselor, but I think that anyone who cares enough about an ex to get upset about his life is still not over him and shouldn't be marrying someone else. JMO

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Posted by Snowflake08

i dont agree
i dont think if you think of someone than you should re-think getting married
i was with someone for 7 years and it would be a lie to say that i NEVER think of them
i think its natural; human nature

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i agree that it is normal to still think about the person, i still see him around also bc he grew up in the same neighborhood as me and FH, we have alot of the same friends and yeah hes on my friends myspace pages. Also checking just to see what theyre up to is normal...i guess just the way the post was worded some of us took it the wrong way. Like i said its normal to think about them but personally i wouldn't get upset if he was getting married, hes been in a serious relationship for a few years and it doesn't bother me and nor do i miss him...I guess just the wording threw some of us off

Yes they are part of the reason we are who we are today, but i personally associate that with i know all the wrong things that happen in a relationship and with FH i make sure to do the opposite lol. IT was 8 years of my life so of course it was a big part of my life but also its one that after i got out of i knew it was the best thing to do even before i met FH and infact what should have been done a long time before maybe thats why i look at it like that...When you are the one who was rejected i think sometimes the situation can be a bit different

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Posted by blurgirlny

Thanks to all who 'get' what I was trying to say. I'm content with my guy, it was more the curiosity and wonder about what he's been up to. The break up was so odd. We were together for 4 yrs then one day I just couldn't reach him by phone and he was MIA for over 24 hrs. Then at 1AM he called me to say its over. We never talked or hung out again after that phone call. He sent me a huge box with all my things in it and I heard he moved in with a coworker chick he was - I guess seeing on the side.

It has seriously been 10 years. We were college kids then. I wonder if my FH's exes think about him, not that there were many, ha ha.

My first boyfriend (of 3 years from h.s.) is gay now and we have no connection at all. Haven't spoke since like 1999. I found him on myspace and stalked his page until he deleted himself. Ha ha!

I am one nosy b**ch, let me tell you. Good to know there are some others out there. I mean it's harmless web stalking and makes for great convo and gossip with the girls.

My MOH LOVES her hubby and would never doubt marrying him for a second, though she peeks at her ex's Myspace blog weekly and we laugh about how insane he is and how dumping him was the best thing she ever did. (She'd kill me if she knew I told anyone! She knew him for so many years.)

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thats the problem, the way things ended, whenever it happens like that the other person always feels like they never got the closure they should've gotten and that person has something over them.

Oh yeah i do that with my friends too regarding my ex, he is out of his mind lol and we laugh about certain things

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Posted by jnkcrunk

I think I'd feel bad for the FW of any of my exes.

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LOL! same here

It's not that I'm not 'over him' - I just felt a twinge of sadness for like a few hours, not even sadness, just like a 'wow, he's getting married' feeling.

Trust me, I love my FH and I'd never NOT marry him because I felt a few moments of reverie over a guy who TEN YEARS AGO, was a big part of my life and my family whom I haven't had contact with since 1997.

Trust me, I'm way over the ex, I guess I should have chosen my words better in this original post. I didn't mean for this to be a huge 'DO NOT MARRY YOUR GUY IF YOU THINK ABOUT YOUR EX' convo... if that were the case, I'd never get married. I always wonder about people from my past be it friends or boyfriends.

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Posted by MrsDtoBe


I'm not quite sure that you are ready to marry your FH if you are feeling this way. I am by no means a counselor, but I think that anyone who cares enough about an ex to get upset about his life is still not over him and shouldn't be marrying someone else. JMO

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Posted by carolinebr

Oh PLEASE!
I am happily married with a gorgeous baby. I've googled my ex. And if I found out he was getting married I would def be hurt! How DARE he replace me!!!!

Don't even try to tell me some of you don't feel the same

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I've googled everyone! Even my first bf who I dated for a month back when we were 14.

I love it! I envy you for remembering their last names! Ha ha!

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Posted by bluegreen08


I've googled everyone! Even my first bf who I dated for a month back when we were 14.

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Posted by blurgirlny

I love it! I envy you for remembering their last names! Ha ha!

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Posted by bluegreen08


I've googled everyone! Even my first bf who I dated for a month back when we were 14.

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We ended up being friends through HS (for those who are curious, he took a consulting job in Vegas )

I met FH freshman year of college so I don't have THAT many exes to remember!

I have to make you girls laugh... be reading this yesterday i went to sleep last night and had a dream about an x... i was making out wit my x while my fh was in the other room plus the x was married and his wife was standing right behind us!!! very strange dream ... i woke up sceeved out this morning

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Posted by carolinebr

Oh PLEASE!
I am happily married with a gorgeous baby. I've googled my ex. And if I found out he was getting married I would def be hurt! How DARE he replace me!!!!

Don't even try to tell me some of you don't feel the same

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in was just thinking about my last serious BF before i met DH, he dated a girl for a while (while i was seriously dating DH) and i have to say, i was a teeny bit satisfied when i heard they broke up... i had met her, she was really nice, but still... he has to realize by now that he won't find anyone better than me, right?

You guys are harsh. FH doesn't give a s*** and I didn't tell him. I am focused on my wedding, I just thought maybe there was one other girl in the world who looked her ex up.

I know better than to open up on here for next time.... and I thought you guys were tough on that poor girl who was bummed that her inlaws wouldn't help with her wedding. Yikes.

geezz....lighten up

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Posted by MJDoc12

without a doubt--i've been there too! your story sounds like mine--ex-bf was the love of my life...i'd never find another...blah blah.

he's married now--as am i---but sometimes i can't help but enter his name into a search engine for the helluva it. i think we just want to know what happened to THAT part of our life--i'm totally 100% happy with my DH, but hey, i just get curious about the past!

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100% agree....

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Posted by carolinebr

Oh PLEASE!
I am happily married with a gorgeous baby. I've googled my ex. And if I found out he was getting married I would def be hurt! How DARE he replace me!!!!

Don't even try to tell me some of you don't feel the same

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love that

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Posted by blurgirlny

was like my 'soul mate' to me - I was devastated when he dumped me. I sometimes thought if he ever got back in touch w/me, I'd drop my bf at that time and be w/him again.

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I don't think it was that you opened up. I
think most people would be lying if they said they weren't a little sad at finding out an ex is married or has kids or whatever if it was a good relationship.
I think it was the the part above about thinking you would dump your bf, even if it isn't your current thoughts on it.

I've been with my FH for almost 6 years, I will say that when I first met him, deep down I'd think 'ex' wouldn't do that to me. Ex was so much nicer to me and was more of a family guy.... But after like a year of being with FH, I have stopped that... Now I never think, 'if only ex called me, I'd dump my fiance in a heartbeat.' That'd be awful!

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Posted by jennypie47

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Posted by blurgirlny

was like my 'soul mate' to me - I was devastated when he dumped me. I sometimes thought if he ever got back in touch w/me, I'd drop my bf at that time and be w/him again.

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I don't think it was that you opened up. I
think most people would be lying if they said they weren't a little sad at finding out an ex is married or has kids or whatever if it was a good relationship.
I think it was the the part above about thinking you would dump your bf, even if it isn't your current thoughts on it.

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