FSIL UPDATE

I didn't think her response would be good, but I just got the most hateful, venomous letter I have ever received from anyone in my entire life back from her. In the letter she calls me an 'evil stepmother', she tells me I have 'the wit of a cockroach and the maturity of a toddler' and actually rewrites history saying that when we visited in September all we did was throw our wedding in her face. She goes on about many other things, including telling me its horrific that I would schedule my wedding around my grandparents (who are in ill health) instead of being respectful to the fact that hers is this year and making it later. The letter is an essay, the topic? 'Stoop as low as you can to attack your FSIL'. I am beyond shell shocked, and so is FH. I wrote back:

I have never received such a hateful letter in my entire life. Obviously we will never see eye to eye. I don't know what else to say.

FH is going to write her a letter letting her know that if she doesn't turn her attitude around then she is not welcome at our wedding. I do not want her there, period. I do not want such a hateful, terrible person at the most important day of my life.

I am just in complete shock...I don't even know what to do with myself. I can't believe I have to go back out into the world and function.

If anyone is interested in the full text of the letter, I'm more than happy to send it to you, if only because it will help me solidify that yes...this actually did happen and I'm not in some kind wacko world...but I warn you, its absolutely horrific.

im sorry

I am sooooo sorry that you have to deal with this wretched woman. I am, however a nosy biotch, so I would love to read the whole letter...

I wouldn't mind reading it. (nosey much?).. if you don't mind sending it.

I'ms really sorry this relationship has deteriorated so badly. You seem like such a nice person, non-abrasive... I'm just really sorry.

Send it to me please and I don't understand why some people are so hateful. I think they are just miserable in their own lives so they want to take everyone down with them.

if you want you can send it to me...

i shared my friend letter the other week so i know how you feel

wow unreal

I am sorry

and i cant believe fh is even considering to have her at the wedding

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Posted by RitasEngaged

wow unreal

I am sorry

and i cant believe fh is even considering to have her at the wedding

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He's really not...because he knows she won't turn it around. He's at the point where not only does he not want her at ours, he doesn't want to go to hers either.

i'm soooo sorry! that's awful that you have to deal with her!!!! i'm a nosy biotch too, i wanna read if you don't mind!

im here if u want to talk.. anyyy time

I'm so sorry, Ilana. You did all you could do to try and at least have a civil relationship with her.

I'd read it if you're comfortable sharing it with me.

I'm so sorry you have to deal with this during one of the happiest most important times of your life. She's the only one who will regret this - one day she will look back and, hopefully, be ashamed of herself.

WOW

i can't believe that.... your letter was so sincere and mature....she sounds like a really jealous, immature person...ugh

i am so sorry about the way she is acting and the response that you got, which I am sure you weren't expecting...

just know that you are the better person and tried reaching out and she just shut you down..

we are all here for you!

I am so sorry you are going thru this .. no one deserves it.. I wish we could all set your FSIL straight..obv she is the toddler !! Again, I am so sorry .. you were the bigger person and tried to handle this in the most mature way possible.

i am so sorry

My opinion about the letter, is that

1. if she rarely sees her niece than that would mean she rarely sees how you interact with her... so how she can form such a strong opinion after rarely seeing you guys is really annoying...

2. Facebook has gotten me and my sisters in ridiculous arguments with my SIL too...

3. As far as the timing of the engagement and wedding... its always been my opinion that you have to do what is right for you... and others are going to have a problem. If it wasnt your FSIL, it would have been someone else...