Going to the priest tonight for the anullment process...

Can anyone shed some light on this process for me? I know there is alot of paperwork to fill out but Im soooo nervous because the priest seemed very judgemental on the phone about me marrying as a teenager because I got pregnant and because I am not living at home now but with FH. This is the same priest that during my sons christening he called the godmother and idiot. He also rolled his eyes when my son asked him to bless his cross at my daughters confirmation. I would never take this treatment from anyone but I feel like I have to because he's a deacon of the church ya know?

I started the annullment process and abandoned it. The paperwork was way too overwhelming and costly besides. It sounds like you should speak with a different priest.

We married in a non-denominational ceremony in the end, but it was somewhat religious and spiritual.

I wish you the best of luck, but most people get so frustrated with the process they just give up.

Oh and you will have to pay $250 up front because they know they may never hear from you again!!!

You have to keep in mind that many Catholic priests are very old school and don't take annulments, living w/ FH before marriage, and divorce lightly. But, you should not have to deal with a rude priest like that. I definitely think you should research some other church options.

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Posted by Bunnymonkey

personally, i would investigate working with another church.

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ditto!

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Posted by jimmysgrl

Oh my! Yes, a different priest, a different Church, anyone!

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I feel the same way!

At the very least get another priest, possibly another church or abandon the process all together.

I don't know much about it but my Dad had to get an annulment. He rushed into a second marriage shortly after my mother died tragically and it was an awful situation... only lasted from Aug-March. Two years later he met another woman and dated her for 5 years before deciding to get married. He wanted to get married in the Catholic church so he had to get the second annuled. I don't remember much because he didn't share much with me, for obvious reasons of me being a teenager and it being none of my business, but I once (a few years ago) found an entire pad of paper (probably at least 50 pages front to back) documenting several incidents during their short marriage that would give reason as to why the marriage should have never taken place. (My Dad had a stroke and I was going through boxes of papers when I came upon it.) As far as I know you have to provide 'evidence' as to reasons that existed that the marriage shoud have never taken place.

Years later it was painful for me to read. The process of reliving such events is painful enough. Funny how the Church says God is forgiving but the priest doesn't seem to be... JMO

Aside from this preist soundingr eally unfriendly and not so helpful, you have to remember that the catholic church does not really want to have a large number of annulments. Think about it from their perspective, especially if you have ever attended Pre-Cana or a similar program. Marriage is intended to be a permanent covanent, so of course they realy want to make sure any annulments are thoroughly thought through and 'investigated' for lack of a better term. It is hard on you as well, so having someone form thechurch who you are comfortable with is important-- find that person if you can.

Good luck.

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Posted by SomethingBlu

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Posted by jimmysgrl

Oh my! Yes, a different priest, a different Church, anyone!

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I feel the same way!

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I AGREE!
Geez. what happened to thou shalt not judge. ew.

Talk to a priest, not the deacon. And make sure to tell him about the deacon's horrible behavior.

If that doesn't work, go to another church.

Good luck.

I think you need to find a new priest or church. My uncle is a priest and while he has his old school beliefs of not living with FH not getting pregnant before marriage blah blah blah he would NEVER be rude to ANYONE and would certainly never pass judgement on anyone-that is so uncatholic like!! I'd say go above the Deacon and if that doesn't work switch to a different church.

Good Luck!

I chickened out and cancelled the meeting. I would find another deacon but see what happens is the arch diocese assigns you an advocate to go before their panel and I had a choice between him and another rude priest who stopped my brother in laws wedding to scream at me for using a flash and to yell at another woman for the same thing. So I opted to go with the church that my son and daughter made and are making confirmation hoping to be treated alittle better since my kids are active in the church. I was very young not even out of high school when I had my daughter and it was my family who talked me into getting married for legal reasons I didnt want to get married but after I got guilted into it I tried to make the best of it and we were together for 2years(dated for 5yrs.)even had another child together. Needless to say dating is so far from getting married and if I only knew then what I know now right! Havent seen this person for atleast 12yrs. except for maybe twice. My son will be 13yrs. this august and he is the youngest of the two. I dont even want to go into what a miserable person he is and was just Im human and as a child I made a mistake. I dont feel I should be persicuted for it for the rest of my life especially by people who are supposed to teach about forgiveness and understanding. I dont know I havent told FH I didnt go yet. I dont think he'll care though but I feel guilty. I just had such a miserable day I didnt feel like being torn apart. Thanks for all the advice though.