Grandpa question (long, sorry)

When FI and I met, all of my grandparents were alive. In the past three years, they all died. I was so sad yesterday when I was revising my invite list and had to take my 'last' grandpa off the list.

FI has one grandparent left-- his grandfather-- and I love him. Since my grandparents all died, I kept thinking that his grandpa would be sort of a symbol of all of our grandparents, and that I could still feel happy knowing that he'd be there.

Today he threw me for a loop, saying that his mom said his grandfather isn't coming. He's 90, he lives in FL, and last time he came to NY (last year for my FSIL's wedding), he said this was the last time he was going to make the trip.

He's not sick or anything-- just gets tired out easily (takes a lot of naps!).

I was so broken-hearted and I just said, 'We're going to invite him anyway, right? He's going to make his own decision about it, right?' (Because I really believe he'll want to come.) And now I feel guilty because maybe we shouldn't even make him feel like he 'should' come if he's really not up to it.

What do you think?

Oh! You have to invite him!
Let him make the decision - maybe he'll surprise you! If he doesn't you can always have his name mentioned at the ceremony - they did something like that at my sister's...at the time BOTH of my grandparents got sick and their doctor told them that they shouldn't fly and we were devastated.
We wanted them to hire a driver to drive them from Florida!!!

Invite him, but maybe if FH speaks to him, let him knwo that it would be ncie if he could make it, but you nwo its a long trip for him.

My grandfather is in a nursing home upstate & can barely talk & can't walk & I wish he could come. I don't think we are inviting him, b/c he'd be too sad that he can't come.

I'm not even sure if my dad told him I am getting married.

Of course you should invite him. Even call him and tell him how important and special it is for you for him to be there!

Good luck and keep us updated on the situation!

i have a similar situation...

tough call. i would say invite but make sure you let him know that you understand if he is unable to attend.

Thanks, everyone! I think you're right-- we'll send the invite and follow up with a phone call to make sure he knows we'll understand if he can't make it. But, boy, I hope he can. I would be so sad to have no grandparents there.

oh yes send the invite!!!!


we didn't have any grandparents at our wedding

only DH's grandmother is alive...but she lives in Spain and has ear problems and cannot fly- but still got the invite to display with our picture


my grandfather died 2 weeks before the wedding....and it only becomes more poignant...