Greek girls I need some help

I just need to know how greek people do funerals. What I mean is an aunt of and aunt on my FH sides died yesterday and they are buring her on Friday. I know catholics give mass cards at the wake and send flowers.. Stuff like that.. What do the greek people do..

I heard they are not really suppose to leave the house or celebrate anything for 40days.

I just wanted to know how we pay our respects other than showing up at the wake and funeral (which we will do).

Thanks for your help.

I have not been to many funerals, thank God, but from what I know... if you are close to the family, you go to the wake and send flowers, and you may want to cook something for the family- I dont think they are supposed to cook. Also, after the funeral, all the people close to the family go over the house.

I have never really heard about people staying in their houses for 40 days, although 40 days is the mourning period (many people extend to a year or more). During this time, you don't attend any parties, and you wear black or dark colors, and some people (the old-timers) cover the mirrors and keep the shades down in the house. But this is only for the very close relatives... and even the, people mourn in different ways, so not everyone wears black and avoids parties. Then at the end of the 40 days, they have a church service after Sunday mass for the soul of the deceased.

Oh, if you do cook something, remember its Lent now, so they may not be eating meat and/or dairy.

I have never been to a funeral so i wouldnt know exactly - i've been to a wake htough - and my family sent flowers to the funeral home and we went togehter to the wake - otehr than that though i cant help you -

About the 40 days -i think people do that when they are very close to the person that died - as debbie said - you can also wear black for 40 days -

I guess i'm not much help...But everythign Debbie wrote is pretty much the gist of it -

I really dont like thinking about funerals and wakes - i avoid them like the plague - the one wake i went to - i was crying so uncontrollably - i was the only one - everyone else was just a little somber so i felt like such a fool afterwards - it was my godmother's and she was much older - she lived a long and healthy life - her last few years she was suffering the way she was living - I definitely have issues with death...

I've never been to a Greek funeral but the wakes are pretty much the same as Catholic ones. I know some Greek churches sell mass/funeral cards you can buy and bring. Most people wear black....
They can go out during the 40 days, you just aren't supposed to do anything fun - but you can go to work, the store, etc.

I would like to extend my deepest sympathies for your loss. Greek wakes are very similar to catholic ones. Flowers and/or a donation to your church is acceptable. You might want to check with the family b/c sometimes if the person was associated with a charity, they will ask that you make a donation in lieu of flowers. Just a thought.

I am sorry to hear of your loss.

It is very considerate that you asked about the traditions. Your inlaws are very lucky to have you as a part of their family.

I am a 2nd generation Greek American but my formal religion is roman Catholic. My dad is Greek Orthodox and I was raised in his religion as well...so I have experience in both areas.

Sadly, I have been to many greek funeral masses. My most recent one was last month - my 35 year old cousin died of a massive heart attack.

The wake is similar to Catholic ones. Flowers, donations, mass cards - are all welcomed.

Dressing with respect is very important at the wake and in the church. Dress in black and do not wear jeans or sneakers.

When you arrive at the church you will see thin tapered candles in a basket and a display area filled with sand. Put a dollar in the basket, take a candle, light it, put it in the sand and say a prayer.

Depending upon the church, the mass will either be said in all greek or greek and english. It is very symbolic and even though I do not speak greek, I am always comforted by the symbolism. The biggest difference will be that the casket is opened in the church to give loved ones an opportunity to say good bye one last time. That was hard for me to adjust to....and it can be very emotional. There is usually a fish meal with wine afterwards.

There is a 40 day of mourning that is mostly for the immediate family members. On the 40th day there is a memorial mass and then everyone is invited to a fish meal.

Biggest part is to just show your love. Feel free to FM me with any questions.