Groom being Difficult...Help

I just need to vent. I love my finance and am 100% sure that I want to marry him, but he is getting on my nerves. Okay this is the situation Since we got engaged I've been the one organizing everything, getting referrals from friends for vendors, basically doing the research. He comes along when I set up the appointments, and we make decisions together. My problem is that he is always complaining about the money were spending, but yet he wants the best of the best. I just don't get it, I try to cut cost here and there, but then he complains that he expects more for what we are spending. Is anybody elses significant other being a pain? AHH!!!!

Paula, if you don't mind me asking...how many people and how much per plate did you end up paying the end???

Thanks...

To put it quite bluntly...YES! We just got engaged and he keeps saying why are you trying to plan so much? I say let's elope and just do it and he says no, you know I can't do that! Ugh, mixed signals! Let's face it that is why guys aren't in charge of planning these things because they can't deal with the stress!! ;)!

Nancy

You're definitely not alone. My fiance tries to be supportive but when it comes to doing the leg work and making phone calls, I just can't depend on him. He doesn't want me to spend a lot of money but at the same time he's not willing to spend the time meeting with different vendors and negotiate. At one point I suggested we look into hiring DJs because it's much cheaper but he refused to meet with any of them. It got to the point that everyone was getting booked for our date and we had to book a band. I'm just lucky I have bridesmaids and a supportive family to lean on. Don't stress too much. You're not alone and that's what this board is for. We're all here to vent and listen to each other. Good luck!

So Susan G:
Tell us all about your wedding, when did you get married, where, what color were your bridesmaids dresses! Since you have never posted here before and all of the sudden have the urge to tell us how great your video company is why don't you tell us everything.

Ladies-
Try to view any conflicts you have during your wedding planning as practice for how you will work through conflicts in your marriage. You will (hopefully) have many years together, many of us will have children and there will definitely be ups and downs. Just try to approach the whole thing with you eyes wide open and remember what you love about this person and come from that place of love during disagreements. I have been so fortunate. My fiance and I have become closer and closer with the wedding planning. I had to accept early on that he wasn't interested in picking out the china and other registry items. That's who he is. It doesn't matter to him what flowers I pick, he will defer to me on that too. On the other hand he has been great on helping me make all the favors and he does his tasks each time I ask him to handle some things. But I am the planner in the relationship. When we go on vactions, I'm the one who likes to research and read up on it. He's the one who likes to wing it more. We balance each other out in many ways. he has taught me to take things (including myself) a little less serious and I have given him a chance to see things from a 'deeper' angle. I don't mean to babble but wedding plans, the commitment (even if you are totally in love), the costs can all be overwhelming at times and he may be reacting to that. Just allow him space to be who he is but be sure that you let him know what is on your mind too. Good luck and try to enjoy the plans.

Thank you all. I must say you all have lifted up my spirit, as well as made me laugh (Karen-loved the beer bottle centerpiece idea). I found this board in August and it has answered alot of my questions, as well as given me alot of great ideas. Just wanted to say thanks for making this planning a little less stressful. My family is supportive, but their is nothing like having someone to listen, especially since we're all on the same boat. Thanks.
http://weddingromance.com/poems/

You are the Mother I receive the day I wed my wife.

How about a guy who waits until after the contracts are signed to become interested enough to finally raise concerns and questions!!?? Yep, that's happened in our planning on more than one occassion, and it drives me nuts! :) That actually happens with just about everything we do. He basically goes along with whatever I want, a final decision is made and then he questions it. Of course I always get a little offended because I'm the one who did all the leg-work with phone calls, research and making appointments.

He has been right there with me at all the appointments for the wedding (eventhough he tends to grumble about it), and we really have agreed on everything so far. He's the one to shrug off the money concerns I raise, but somehow we just always know how to compromise. One other cute little note, he's the one who's so tradition bound. Such as with the flowers, I was thinking of a mix, heavily based with Sunflowers while he keeps saying, 'Don't you think we should do Roses?' Luckily we haven't put our official flower choice in writing yet, we just booked the flowerist. He's also the one who wanted the big Church wedding, while I wanted to keep it small and intimate. Looks like he won out on that one.