GRR. some people don't get it.

So even though most of us realize that this is a place for brides to come and post frustrations, share stories and ideas, some brides seem to find it ok to tell your fiance about it and tell them the site name, your screen name and therefore, get you in trouble as some of us, myself included, have VERY VERY VERY VERY VERY private fiances who do not even begin to understand this site in the slightest fashion. They believe that if you mention in response to another bride's fiance who has posted on here to whine that he isn't getting any because of this site that 'when you whine about it, we can hold out longer' means we are telling his coworkers about his sex life which is not the case.

My fiance's secretary was mean enough to not only tell him my screen name but after I told her not to tell him the site's name, someone did. Well, now he's mad at me. I am mad at her. I will/have taken this up with her. I do not appreciate such treatment as I made it clear to her that he wouldn't appreciate this site or any possible postings as he is a very private person...to the point that I joke about if he'll kiss me at the end of the ceremony....he is not a 'PDA' kind of guy.

Be warned, if any LIW brides happen to work with your fiance, they may tell him what you post!



ETA-changed title so it's less obvious.

I'm sorry that happened to you - but this is a public forum. ANYONE can read what is posted here....so you really should be careful of what you post!

WOW!!! My FH loves sneaking behind me to read what people are posting and ask me what is going on in the threads that day. He knows this has been a support line for me and would never ask me to give it up (that and b/c it got us a good deal on our HM!)

I'm so sorry that you are going through this! Definitely have an open conversation with your FH and have a talk with your co-worker.

One suggestion - maybe ask Ron for a new screenname and don't share it with anyone at work!

I'm sorry I would want to take it up to her too... Like the other person said... since anyone can read it, and for the fact that FH might read it, i wouldnt post anything i didnt want him to know.. he thinks i'm a loser (he says jokingly) for going on this site for advice and when i go to him about ideas i got from this site.. such as great DIY projects... he questions why i would use some elses idea since it is MY wedding... he doesnt understand!!!! GRRR!!! he already knows my frustration with him about this.. so if he reads this.. HI Hunny, I love you! Things will blow over.... dont worry about it... Us LIW Brides, understand where u are coming from and the use of this site!

He doesn't get it....he's mad because I vented about something....well, I came here and said hey, this is bugging me....grr. and instead of seeing that i got support/hugs and told, it's ok...that's why we're here, he's all how dare you say that. whatever. I could just scream I am sooo mad. i am now hugging myself. ( ) he never would've known the site's name without someone telling him, i certainly didn't do it. i did nothing wrong---instead of letting things pile up and then boiling over, i let it out slowly. I don't check his sports board postings....but maybe I should. (I am not that nosy and therefore won't, but still...how would he feel??)

---

Posted by palebride

I'm sorry that happened to you - but this is a public forum. ANYONE can read what is posted here....so you really should be careful of what you post!

---

not only that but also if you know if this may somehow get back to the person you were talking about maybe letting his assistant know where you venture into is .. a no-no. his assistant is his assistant. don't let her in on things you do. but if you must, be vague. friends be friends but your FI's assistant.. listen.. it was a careless mistake. it def sux that she outted you. tell her that you expected more from her or don't say anything at all. but def keep things professional. change your screen name if you could so that she won't always follow you around, so to speak. and therefore reading your deepest or fun concerns. personal photos are also a dead giveaway. sorry that it's gone so far but she's his assistant. it's degrading to your FI to have his subordinant know his personal business. squash it and start anew.

I would mention it though, say:

'You dont' understant how helpful these boards have been through the whole wedding planning.. I come to these boards for advice, i give advice, these girls know exactly where I am coming from and can give me peace of mind when i think i am going to lose it... I dont invade your space and read what you post on the sports boards.. but how would you feel it i did that... I would never do that because i understand why you like to go on those boards and talk to other sport fans that share your passion... its the same reason why I go on this site.. i need you to understand why this site is important to me!

Why does your FH even care? Better yet, why does his secretary care? I'd watch out for her, if you know what I mean. Btw, she's obviously reading your postings and getting a kick out of them. She's probably reading this too. What a biatch.

Sorry hun, but thanks for reminding us. Makes you think twice now about posting certain things. . . . big brother could be watching

That's totally out of line!!!! My FH reads behind me but doesnt realy care what's said. He likes that I am on here getting ideas and help from you guys! I'm so sorry that this person was evil and made you guys have an argument. People should learn to m ind their own damn business.

---

Posted by ellebelle1

Why does your FH even care? Better yet, why does his secretary care? I'd watch out for her, if you know what I mean. Btw, she's obviously reading your postings and getting a kick out of them. She's probably reading this too. What a biatch.

---

Hmmm!!! T Thats true!!! Have you met her? Does she seem to have a thing for your FH????

I'm curious too.. she's going to have a lot of girls hating her

nope, i am not going to start a war....besides, she still feels innocent in this. she swears the other secretaries didn't know my screen name and what not and that they weren't going to him about it...so, provided he just made that up to get me to show him my posts (which i didn't do), he could be exaggerating facts to prove his own agenda. imagine that, a lawyer exaggerating the facts.

I asked FH not to read my posts. He asked me if I had any secrets. I told him no but I don't read his emails. And that I also have some details of my dress, etc that is posted here. So, I told him he was not in his best interest to look.

He agreed. I don't say anything bad about him (no reason too!). And he just asks me how the girls of LIW are doing. And once in a while he asks me when I am going to make it to 5K posts so we can win the contest.

That secreatary put her nose where it did not belong. Of course, this is public forum but sometimes it is better to 'stick' together as women.

But Karma is a biatch!!!! What goes around comes around. I hope she does not have any posts out there she does not want exposed either!!!! (evil laugh!!!!)

OK....she still swears she didn't go beyond the screen name one time and that she hasn't really been on LIW since her wedding....that said, i believe her as she is now mad at FH. I told her to do little things to his desk...steal all the pens, change his desktop background picture....too bad she can't put nickels in the receiver of the phone so that he gets used to the weight and then remove them all a la 'the office'