Guests self-inviting other people!!

After sending out our invites, we've had guests adding plus ones without us intending to.

How can we be clear that we are ONLY inviting YOU and only you to the wedding and not someone else to bring along with you?!

Weddings are expensive enough for us to pay for people that I have never met.

How can I explain that to my unmarried/unattached guests?

If it were me I'd just say that you're really sorry for the misunderstanding, but the only people who were permitted +1s were people who are in serious relationships or married because you are trying to keep it smaller.

I blamed the reception hall capacity, and said we were at capacity and weren't permitted to invite many people with guests.

omg! i'm totally experiencing that right now.. i figured adults will know wedding etiquette by this time.. but unfortuantely they dont!! ugh!! when we send out invites that goes 'To Joe Doe&Guests' that means yes, you may bring a guest. but when we only put your name on it, it really just means YOU ONLY!! this is totally frustrating..

but i simply told them, we're trying to keep the wedding a small and intimate affair with people we love and unfortuately we can not include a guest for you unless you are married or in a relationship... HTH

That is sooo rude! Im waiting for that to end up happening cause I will flip! LOL

I would politely call them up and say Im sorry but we received your RSVP and I noticed you added a guest and while this is an awkward situation for me, we didnt invite you with a guest. So I am sorry but you wont be able to bring someone. We are at our maximum and I thought it was clear from the invitation that it was only addressed to you. So Im sorry for the misunderstanding but its nothing personal, no one was invited with guest unless they are married or in a very serious relationship.

---

Posted by mrsjpc3

this happened to us, and it was only people on MIL's side. We invited everyone with a guest, but some people responded with their children (who were not invited). I pawned this task off onto my MIL. She politely called the guests who responded with 8 when only 4 were invited, and told them. It was just easier this way...

---

I agree.. So far we have only had that issue once with our RSVPs but if we get anymore, we are having our parents do the calls. I got enough to deal with as it is!

---

Posted by pa56

I blamed the reception hall capacity, and said we were at capacity and weren't permitted to invite many people with guests.

---

I think this is a good idea. I'm worried about his happening on FH's side for the wedding also.

---

Posted by tboodhai

---

Posted by pa56

I blamed the reception hall capacity, and said we were at capacity and weren't permitted to invite many people with guests.

---

I think this is a good idea. I'm worried about his happening on FH's side for the wedding also.

---

I ended up blaming the reception hall for a lot of things! For people who didn't RSVP on time or even after friendly emails/phone calls, I called them AGAIN and told them that the reception hall wouldn't permit changes in the number of guests after this weekend and so I need to know if they're coming otherwise I would have to write them down as a no, per the RH's rules. It totally worked.

It's my favorite scapegoat in the book - blame it on the RH!!!!

Yep say the fact our hall only fits blank amount of people and the reason why we only wrote your name is for that reason!
What is wrong with people. I mean I can understand if they called and asked but just them adding it to the RSVP card is so TACKY!
'

I'm one for being honest because it doesn't bite you back at a later date. Just say, 'I'm sorry, but the invitation was for you only and at this time we can not be accepting any additional guests. If things change, I will let you know.' This way you are acknowledging their desire to come with a guest, you are not closed to the possibility but you are communicating it is not possible at this time and you will reevauate when you have more information on responses. What you actually choose to do is up to you and your fiance.

You do not HAVE to give a reason.You are not being rude, you are clarifying a 'misunderstanding', aka their inconsideration and lack of understanding what it takes to pull off a wedding. For anyone who gives you a difficult time or claims they will not come, it maybe time to reevaluate that relationship as their guest is more important than the event of your marriage. Hmmmm....

Yes, was just down this road, last week.