HELP!!!!

HELP!!!!

I am signed in under a diffrent name. My FH wants to postpone the wedding. I am in SHOCK!!!! There was no indication and all he said was 'I don't think I am ready to get married next year' I can't eat, sleep or work I have stayed home for 3 days now in bed. I still have bids on E-Bay that I have yet to win or am winning. I have EVERYTHING, dates on EVERYTHING!!! HELP someone help.

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I guess no one has any advice for me.

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I'm so sorry. But you need to talk this out with your FH and maybe get counsling. If you have problems, that should be your #1 concern- not whether you will lose deposits, have to get new cards, etc.. lets face it- the wedding is ONE DAY. You marriage is supposed to last a life time.

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It's not the deposits I am concerned about, I NEVER said that... I am just so crushed I don't know what to do.

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how soon where you to get married. Do you have a lot booked? Did you have a fight. If he is not ready, you can't foce him, but he at least should explain why the sudden change in feelings. (if you are not in sync it's better to find out now). definetly talk to him

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I think you need to get yourself together and talk to your FH. Maybe he is just scared, maybe something is bothering him at work and he doens't think you can afford it. Time isn't the worse thing. Maybe you can go out for a nice dinner tonight and talk things out.

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I am so sorry to hear this....I wish I had some advice for you....

Did you talk to him more about the reasons he feels this way? What happened to make him suddenly change his mind?

Does he want to stay together and just postpone, or does he want to part ways?

Listen, the wedding, like Sassy75 said, is just one day....You can reschedule, you can still wear the dress and use all the things you bought etc...
First and foremost should be having a long talk with your FH.

I'm sure your vendors will work with you......

I am so so sorry!

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we have EVERYTHING booked, just last week we were going over songs for the wedding. and then POW he just said he loves me and still wants to be with me .. just that he dosen't know if he is ready. I keep asking him what the means and if there was a reason or just cold feet and he says he dosn't know. I cry all day and all night and he says ' Why are you crying it is just postponed' we had 6 months until the wedding.

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I am so sorry this is happening to you. I have to agree with the other ladies- I would definately talk to him about this and find out what is wrong. The only way you are going to get through this is communication. Maybe get counseling together- anything that would help.

I hope it all works out for you!

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cold feet is common, I know it's gotta hurt for him to say that and seems so uncertain. But things will work out. Maybe talk to someone for counseling adn see why the change

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Thank you ladies. This is the frist time I have told anyone. I'll set up a talk session tonight. I just can't beleve it. and we NEVER EVER fight EVER. Simply stated I am CRUSHED!!

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You have to get the fact that your vendors are booked out of your head.. you need to simply pretend that none of that exists- and you HAVE to work it out with your FH. Do not say, 'but we have everything booked'.. that's not important- what is important is making your relationship work.

what's the worse that happens? say you do postpone it- and then your relationship is all the stronger? is that so bad?

things will work out- just be calm and be open to discussion and don't worry about the actual wedding

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I agree, you two need to sit down and have a heart to heart! He needs to explain the best he can WHY he feels he isnt ready and you need to explain to him why you are crushed by his need to postpone the wedding.

My opinion, this could be a blessing in disguise. Talking it out and developing a better understanding for each others needs/wants/feelings will make you a stronger couple.
I think you need to remember that a person needs to be whole heartedly ready to get married and just because he isnt ready doesnt mean he doenst love you more than anything! It just means he needs time to figure himself out before he can devote himself 100% to you!

I think the first step, and the hardest, is you need to start living life again! You need to go two work and not let this development consume you. That will only make it harder!

Good Luck and keep us posted!!

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First I just want to say that I'm sorry this is happening and send you many 's.

If your FH is not ready than you have to take his feelings seriously. Everything may be booked and sure he should have said something earlier, but getting married is a serious - lifetime commitment. If he is not ready, you do not want to get married! You both have to want this. If he's not in it 110% than this is only the start of trouble.

Don't get me wrong if this were me I would be shocked, upset and probably angry. But I would have to understand and make a decision to postpone.

Stay strong - it will all work out the way it was meant to.....

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Sassy I think you are right. I need to work on what is wrong. not worry about the wedding.

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Just concentrate on making your relationship stronger than ever and you will be fine..

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Thank you ladies !!! thank you It feel good talking to someone about this. only his brother knows and one of his frends a GM. Thank you again

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i'm so sorry this is happening to you... , but sassy is absolutely right....forget about the plans for now...listen to him and talk...and then KEEP listening...and talk some more.. if you guys never fight, then obviously you should have good communication between the 2 of you, especially since he felt that open with you to be that honest BEFORE getting married and THEN saying something once the commitment was made...stay strong and keep your chin up....it will work out....