Hey ladies, usually I have silly questions but this time it's serious. We are having issues over here and honestly I can't wait til my wedding is over so I can be happy again. My dad and stepmom are paying for most of the wedding. Because of this they are making majority of the decisions which is fine because I have some say. Now we are discussing invitations and fh and I want it to be personal and sweet, and they want formal. They said tbey are inviting so it should be what they want. Then, the next problem is that we guaranteed 175. My dad alone invited 100 people. My mom invited 36. We have 10 together and that leaves 24 people for fh family to invite. Now there is something wrong with this. What should I do? My fh is to the point where he wants to call off the wedding and just get married by the justice of the peace. Does anyone have any suggestions? My dad is very stubborn. Oh yeah, he said fh parents can invite more people but we can't have more then 200 and then they would have to pay abnother $3000. I don't want that at all. UHHHHH, I was told this would be hard but I had no idea!
snowcat
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Keep in mind that about 20-30% of your list declines, so if you invite 220, you will def. be under 200!
suzzi7404
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that's true but even still the wedding will be 0% my family and 20% his. He has a huge family too!
billandme
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Is there any way you can have a heart to heart with your dad? Just explain everything to him and see what he says.
It's great that your parents are helping with the wedding financially, but at the end of the day, they have to understand that this is YOUR wedding and this day is for you and your FI to remember......and if that means sacraficing a few things on their part......then so be it.
Maybe you and your FI can put more money into it to make it easier if your dad is stubborn??
Sorry you are going through this
suzzi7404
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Thanks so much for the advice. I wish it were that easy. My dad won't budge. I also wanted him and my mom to walk me down the isle because she raised me and he said absolutely no way. If I had more money to put into the wedding I would in a second. The thing is if it were up to me I would just have a nice small wedding with everyone I care about, but he went all out and wants this huge ordeal.
I don't know what to say but I can give you some of these.
suzzi7404
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thanks I need some of those!!!
Vicky423
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why don't you have both sides write down there whole guest list, and you and your FH come up with your guest list. Then start cutting down the list so that atleast both sides have their families and then add friends. Guest list are one of the hardest parts of wedding planning. We had to do a lot of negotiating with my parents cause my family is HUGE and FH's family is small so I hear you.
keep us posted
suzzi7404
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Yeah, I'm only inviting 8 friends. I told two of them they can't bring guests unless they have a boyfriend at the time. I feel so mean
vmystique33
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So sorry !! What if you paid for the extra people you invite
suzzi7404
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ok, so my step mom just called and told me that the more she thinks about it the more she thinks it should be formal. This is how she wants it worded.
Mr. and Mrs. ____________ request the honor of your presence at the marriage of Susan ___________ daughter of _______ and ________ to John _______________ son of ______________ and __________ that's just a little too much I think. Especially for the invitation we picked out. I guess I have to just let them do what they want.
