HELP! The best man shaved his head!

I am hoping that you can give me some advice with this one, since I have no idea how to handle it. My FH's brother is the Best Man, and he just completely shaved his head! He said that he was going to wait until after the wedding, but then he did it last week. When he told us what he did, he said not to worry, that he would grow it back for the wedding. Now he says he's not sure, since he thinks that he is getting a lot more attention from girls. I don't know what to do - I don't think that it looks good at all, and I am afraid that it is going to ruin my pics - especially since he is playing such a big role. I know I am being somewhat selfish, but do you think that it is too much for me to ask that he has hair? My wedding is in 5 1/2 weeks. He doesn't listen well to reason, and at times is very selfish. Any advice is greatly appreciated!

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

JMO - I think yo uare being a bit selfish here. When you look back on your pictures in a few years, you will notice that your 'brother in law' was in your wedding and how special it was. Not that his head is shaved. It shouldnt matter. It should matter WHO is in your wedding, and their meaning in your life.... not what they look like. And if he is happy with it, then it is his decision, he shouldnt have to change his look just so he will look ok in his brothers wedding.

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

I agree with that, but why woudl he decide to do this now. He prefaced his statement with I know that this is going to upset you but....He has never shaved his head before, so why 6 weeks before the wedding? I think that is even more selfish!

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

Think about what your saying.. Its HIS LIFE and HIS HAIR. It shouldnt make a difference to you. Maybe it does look good on him. Just because YOU dont like it doesnt mean that it looks bad. Thats like asking someone to lose weight to look better in a BM dress....just so your pictures will look ok. I dont see him being selfish at all. People have said this before on this board...this may be the most important day of you and your fiances life, but that doesnt mean that its the most important to everyone. Not to say that it isnt important to his brother, but he has his own life, and whether he decides to cut his hair, shouldnt be a concern of yours just for pictures.

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

so he's got that vin diesel look going on huh?

I think nowadays a shaved head is so accepted. I especially love when men who are losing their air shave their heads. It is so much nicer than that sweep look (whats up with that anyway?!)
I say don't worry. I doubt anyone will comment on his head, I think they will all be commenting on how beautiful YOU look!

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

Hate to say it but I think a lot of guys have shaved heads and it is a style and it looks nice on many. My little brother has practically a shaved head and he was my brother's best man. That never factored into the decision into making him a best man. Also, my brother said there are tons of pictures of my brother and he came out perfect in everyone.

He is in your bridal party because of his importance to you not how he looks.

I know this because my FMIL didn't want my FI to ask one of his friends because of his appearance (he has kind of wild, hippy like hair). This upset me very much because I feel he is a true friend.

Honestly, I would not let this upset you!

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

My FH's stepbrother who is in our wedding party is the rugged outdoorsy type of guy. He has a beard and his hair is sometimes long but he is shaving his beard and going to look cleaner for our wedding. I don't think it is selfish of you to want him to have hair but if that is what he really wants then I guess you have to accept it.

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

I think you might be freaking a bit. Our best man had a serious freak accident about 1 month ago at work. There was a combustion explosion that caused second & Third degree burns over most of his face(thank god he was wearing safety glasses) & his hands-he still might need a skin graft between his fingers. Thank god he's okay & healing beautifully-if you look closely you can tell his neck looks weird. When he told my Fi the night it happened he said'tell Kelly I'll be healed up in time for the wedding'as if I cared-I was so worried about him.
My point, sh*t happens-we chose these people to be in our wedding because we love them, not because of the way they look in pictures, right?

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

I know that this sounds very bad, but I guess that it is because there is too much background that can't e explained. His family is giving me a really hard time with everything, and I feel like this was done purposely to get a reaction. He has specifically told me (in other instances) 'I am the best man - I can do whatever I want'.

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

That may be a different story if he did it on spite (I know how that feels..been there with in-laws).

Please don't let it get to you. It is him who has to wear the shaved head. Let him be silly and/or immature and shave his head if he thinks that spites you. Maybe if you act like it doesn't bother you...it will be even better in the end. You have not long to go...try not to let this thing break you down!

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

Richs -

I totally agree - I think that it is more the fact that he made the decision knowing that we were going to be upset. A few weeks before he did this, he had a whole conversation with us saying that he was going to shave his head, but he knew that we wouldn't like it, so he decided to wait until after the wedding. We told him how much we appreciated it if he would wait just until the wedding was over.

I think that I am more upset that he cares more about what some random girls think than how we feel.

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

FH has been teasing me about doing the exact same thing.

I agree it's bad timing on his part (esp since he knew it would upset you), but since the deed is done, theres not too much you can do now. Maybe after you get used to it a bit and his scalp gets a little color it wont look as bad to you.

I am sure you wont even notice it in the pictures - you are just going to see the beautiful couple that look at each other with such love and happiness that day.

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

jw-
it seems as though your feelings are justified, yet there may be little you can do about it. can your FH say something, or is that out of the question? what about FMIL? i dont think you are being selfish at all - i would probably be upset by this also, especially if it seemed as though he did this to spite you (of course, however, you may just THINK he did this to spite, when in fact he's just an immature guy who doesn't exactly 'think' before he does things). whatever happens, just dont let this ruin your day!

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

You really can't let this bother you, it's his choice how he wants to wear his hair. Don't take it so personal. I understand you want everything to be perfect on your day but if you let this bother you you'll end up ruining your day and possibly your relationship with someone who is going to be part of your family. Just hang in there, maybe if you don't make a big deal out of it he'll grow it back.

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

Commenting on Jennbaby's post...which made me laugh....if he DOES have the Vin Diesel look going on how could that look bad in your pics??? LOL

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

at least it wasn't your FH that shaved his head!

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

Good point Met!

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

You have enough to worry about anyway, so don't worry about him. Things will be fine, you'll see.

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

At least you won't have to worry about his hair being out of place or him showing up with brightly dyed hair or something worse like a mohawk.

Re: HELP! The best man shaved his head!

I wouldn't worry about it. Point is, it will be your day, and I doubt your focus will be on him. Just enjoy your day, and don't give him any more attention about the baldy. Especially if he did it out of spite, the last thing you want to do is encourage his behavior by letting him get to you.