HELP! Two Distraught Brides on a HUGE Budget!

Ok so here is our story in a small nut shell :)

We got engaged in 2008 in Disney World and have been ever since. Now that we are reaching our 4 year ann. date of being together we figured its time to FINALLY get married! We live in NY so its not yet legalized but were hoping it will be by 2012. I am a HUGE Disney freak and this is the main reason we waited is so we could get married in Disney world, because my dream was to get married in Disney World... but it’s so expensive and our families are not willing to Fly out their :(

Now our new problem is money and decent venues. We have been to two so far: Shoreham Village Hall and Med Manor. We have an apt. to see Brentwood Country Club and Thursday and Larkfield Manor we canceled our apt. because it’s out of our budget. So far my fiancé’s parents are willing to give ups about 5,000 towars the wedding. My father on the other hand is being well... not cooperative. He paid for my sisters WHOLE wedding without blinking an eye, but he is giving me a hard time!

Med Manor quoted us a little over 16,000 for a Friday night wedding in July for 150 people. It was 20,000 for 200 people. This was the package they were offering. As I was walking around the venue I was just like 'ugh' I don't know. I liked it a lot better than Shoreham Hall, but its just not Disney lol Something about the rug made me itch and the onsite 600 fee to get married there and it’s not even legal. It’s just so much to take into consideration, I am actually thinking maybe we should just skip this wedding and go to the next step of life and try to have kids and buy a house instead.

We are trying to find a place that has a package deal because getting everything separate is just going to cost us even more money in the long run. I am so frustrated right now I just want to cry and almost did in the middle of Med Manor. I pulled up and was like eww I almost didn't go in. The guy was really nice and everything, but I just don't know. I don't want to settle and I don't want a dumpy wedding. My sister’s wedding was gorgeous she had hers at Majestic Gardens for 100pp in 2002.

I really wanted to get married by the water at sunset... our fav time is sunset! We are definitely going to have a Disney themed wedding no doubt about that, but its the venue that is going giving us a headache. Advice? I've read almost every post from the last 5 months on this board because I am the type of person that is a HUGE researcher and i value everyone’s HONEST opinions! So please be honest with me! WHAT SHOULD WE DO ?

First off, I am sorry that you have to deal with the legality issue. It is embarrassing that New York has not passed a law yet.

When you say 'your families won't fly down' do you mean your extended family or immediate family? Destination weddings tend to be smaller, so you probably wouldn't have 200 guests, but you could get married where you want, with the people important to you. If you went really small (50 people?) then you could fly some of them down yourself.

If you don't want to do that, maybe try getting married in a different month, which tends to be less expensive. Also go for a Friday or Sunday (also cheaper). There is no way I could afford to get married at my RH on a Saturday night in July, but a Sunday in March, I could swing.

First of all - CONGRATULATIONS!!!!

And what you should do is BREATHE.

There are lot of considerations and you probably have more options that you think. If you're willing to have the wedding Off Season (Usually November - MArch) or on a Thursday night for example, you can save a lot of money. The Wednesday before Thanksgiving is becoming popular and you can save a bundle. I've heard of places that are normally well over $100 giving Thursdays for $50-80. If you're not limited to Fri-Sun, then I don't think you need to stick to a package deal. How about Riviera of Massapequa, Chateau La Mer, or Coral House (all have water) on a Thursday?>

Also, depending on the size of your party, you could have it at a smaller place, like a restaurant. Vetro in Howard Beach has a water view.

With some time and imagination, you can do a LOT with your theme and bring Disney World to NY. We got engaged at WDW and we're bringing in some Disney elements to the wedding. We're keeping it mostly low key, but the sky is really the limit.

Overall, my advice is to BREATHE, figure out your guest list. Decide what your MUSTS are. Is nighttime a must? Is summer a must or could you so it in January which is much cheaper? Are you willing to do a Wednesday or Thursday night? Is the water really a must? I think you're limiting yourself more than you need to with the package deal.

if you still want a package, you can always book whatever hall you want and then do the packages that Wedding Center of COmmack offers. I believe they have DJ, Limo, Photo, etc packages that can be used at any hall.

I can't really vouch for it, not having used them, but HERE are the packages that the wedding center offers

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Posted by lindseynaggle

First off, I am sorry that you have to deal with the legality issue. It is embarrassing that New York has not passed a law yet.

When you say 'your families won't fly down' do you mean your extended family or immediate family? Destination weddings tend to be smaller, so you probably wouldn't have 200 guests, but you could get married where you want, with the people important to you. If you went really small (50 people?) then you could fly some of them down yourself.

If you don't want to do that, maybe try getting married in a different month, which tends to be less expensive. Also go for a Friday or Sunday (also cheaper). There is no way I could afford to get married at my RH on a Saturday night in July, but a Sunday in March, I could swing.

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Agreed with all of the above. WHAT are we waiting for to get marriage equality in NYS? Maybe you should have a destination wedding in a state where it would be legal.

Destination weddings CAN be smaller, BUT i did look into Disney weddings and even the smallest packages are REALLY pricey and you get so much more here.

CONGRATS!!!!

It's a shame that NY has not caught up with the rest of the world - or at least parts of it.

Like the girls above me have said - the timing is what will really make this happen for you. There are venues that will bring the prices down during the off seasons - additionally, saving money will help by cutting down your guest list. I know that's not where you want to save money - however - each guest adds up!

With the Disney theme - you can make it happen with a little creativity.

The girls on here are amazing for advice.

Good Luck!

HERE is a review of a LIW bride who was at Med Manor and used the package deal from Wedding Center. It seems like she was reasonably happy.


I personally went RIDICULOUSLY over budget on my hall so I had to be low budget on other things, so I can also recommend some vendors that are less pricey.

soo random i was wondering if there were any same sex couples on this site!! congrats.. i agree with everyone about NY and every other state getting on with it already.

Did you consider changing the month or time of year to get married? That can lower the price. I know what you mean about just putting the $ towards the house. My FH always says why don't we just take the $ your parents are paying and put it towards a house.

Sunset and the waters so nice, i always say lets go to hawaiiii and do it. No luck =p

Im sure you'll find a place that will give you everything your looking for, if not im sure you can always turn something into your dream hall

My cousin and his husband had a distinction wedding in Hawaii ... there were only 10 people there and it was exactly what they wanted.

There are options out there. Decide what is most important to you and then budget out you money accordingly. this will help you find a place and vendors that you will be happy with.

my first suggestion is to take a week or two off from thinking about wedding plans if you feel like its making you nuts. i know for myself when i first started planning it was overwhelming to look at so many places and compare prices and what each place was offering etc., you could research yourself into a frenzy.

also there are definitely halls that offer comprehensive packages they offer a whole bunch all rolled into one cost. Just off the top of my head I know Ariana Waterfall offers a big package and The Riveria in Massapequa includes centerpieces in their per person price.

have you thought about the wineries maybe? that way you can just pay a site fee and than shop around for the best price for caterering. im not sure if that will be cheaper but its an option.

trying to think of fun venues for you that will give you the disney-vibe without breaking the bank and making your guests travel

what about the New York Aquarium not sure of the pricing but i read on yelp that its reasonable
NY Aquarium

cant get more by the water than a wedding on a boat! i happen to love this option me and my fiance we're considering it, until i actually went on a boat and realized im the type to get bad sea sickness. i still think its an awesome idea.
Boat Wedding

Check out sunset harbor in patchogue - they were reasonable.

My fh's brother and his partner are getting married next yard in CT. They would rather do it here but the legal thing got in their way also.

I'm also embarassed that NY hasn't legalized same-sex marriages yet. CONGRATS and good luck!

Look into Mill Pond Country Club. They are in Medford so it is in the general area you are looking. That's where I got married last summer. The price is definitely in your range. The ceremony and cocktail hour are outside. The grounds are beautiful. You are the only wedding. They do offer a package deal. I didn't use it so I can't say if it was worth it or not but it was affordable. The food was excellent and the staff was incredible. HTH

Yes if you do a brunch thing, it will cost less

If you can keep your guest numbers down, that will help!

We are using Sans Souci and they do have a wedding package that includes flowers and cake

We invited 170 and will have a final count of like 111-115

Calm down and take a breath. It will all work out!

Have you looked at the View in Northport? Used to be Gladstone. It might not fit as large of a party that you are talking about, but friends have had large rehearsal dinners there

Sorry. Used to be Glads

Arianna Waterfalls in West Hempstead has a great package deal that includes all. I went to a wedding there for one of my best friends and it was fantastic and she had no problems with any of the vendors.

Also, the Douglaston Manor has all inclusive packages with the Wedding Plaza/Ariana Studios in Floral Park.

Both of these venues are beautiful with no itchy carpeting !! lol

If not, follow your dream and have a small wedding at disney with immediate family. If they love you, they will go. Just tell them the date and time and hope for the best.

We're having a Disney themed wedding too!! We should compare notes!

FM if you want