hes leaving me.....

Original post by kdelace

Sep 23, 2004 01:21 PM

my husband decides now that he doesnt need counseling and that hes not coming tonight and that this is over!!! what an a$$hole!!

i cant believe him right now. he says that he married a 40 year old woman- referencing that i dont like to go out and have a good time.. if you knew me that is so untrue.. but his idea of a good time is coming home obliterated....sorry not my idea of having fun with my husband...

i am numb right now- ive been crying here at workall day. he was so mean to me on the phone...he has some serious issues. maybe this is a good thing but right now i have a pit in my stomach.... he says he has a drinkingproblem but so what so do all of his friends..real mature 31 year old....

the one person that cares about him and doesnt want him ending up 'dead' has given me the boot! at this point even if he had a revelation i dont think id want him back.

sucks- its my birthday next week and im going to be miserable!!!!!i know it will be bettwr for me in the long run but i am so angry at him for making his problem my fault!!!

eta- thanks for fms-i can see that i have them but i cant read them at work they are blocked!

princess99 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 03:44 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I am so sorry. One day when he sobers up he will realize what a jerk he was and it will be too late- you will have moved onto better things. here are some hugs.

nov04LIbride Posted: Sep 23, 2004 03:53 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I'm so sorry. All I can say is there is someone out there deserving of your love and you will find him. This was just an obstacle on the way. It will get easier over time.

lilmrs Posted: Sep 23, 2004 04:14 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I am soo sorry for all that you are going through. Please know that I am here for you if you ever need me.

beachgirl13 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 04:18 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

Sooooooo sorry!

suven Posted: Sep 23, 2004 04:46 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

oh, I'm so sorry. But, at this point, let him go. It's not right for him to keep jerking you around...first wanting to go, then wanting to make it work, then leaving again...

let him go...

CubanBride Posted: Sep 23, 2004 04:58 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I think I am going to throw up. I am so angry foryou right now. Ugh! You know what, you need to concentrate on you. Go out. Trust in you friends. Enjoy your life. I knows it's easier said than done, but at least try.

soon2bmrs2004 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 05:18 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

mlp924 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 05:53 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

Please go do something nice for yourself. He's not ready to fix himself yet. Find happiness for yourself. Don't let him berate you for his shortcomings. Stay strong!

lvdolphins Posted: Sep 23, 2004 06:04 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

Posted by Jan05Bride

All I can do is give you lots and lots of hugs

and prayers!!! Stay strong!

kelly4 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 06:52 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

HUGS!

I am so sorry, but want to add that I dated and almost married a guy like yours a while ago. my heart goes out to you. I still wonder what my ex's life is like and worry about him ending up dead. I know that I couldn't live my life wondering and worrying about him. It was a rough break up and getting over him, but I did make it through and my life is much better. I do think about him a lot not because I am still in love with him, but that I spent 6 years of my life with him and care. I always will and wish the best for him. You will I'm sure have the same feeling for your (sorry- I dont' know if I should call him your ex or DH, but you know what I mean.)

I'm glad you know that it will work out in the long run and you are better off without him. It will get easier with time and I admire you. YOu are a strong woman who will not put up with anyting that is harmful to you. You should be applauded!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Congrats and hugs on your new life!

Lora

DebsNY Posted: Sep 23, 2004 06:55 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I am so very sorry to hear this... I've been thinking about you the last few weeks since you first posted and was really hoping everything would work out.

My thoughts are with you at this difficult time.

barb04 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 06:56 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I'm so sorry

LIJuneBride Posted: Sep 23, 2004 07:02 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I'm sorry that things are turning out this way. I think your DH really does have an alcohol problem. There was someone in my life who also had that problem, and I could not understand why I (or anyone else in his life, for that matter) was not more important to him than the drinking. I thought if he loved me, and he knew that was no good for him and affected our relationship, he would stop. But it's a disease and they don't stop unless they want to. They have blinders on to everything else in their lives and it is very difficult to live with someone like that.

This is not your fault and I know it doesn't seem like it now, but this, I think, is for the best. He won't change unless and until he is ready. He needs counseling for his own issues before he can have a relationship with anyone. I know he would say he doesn't have a problem, but anyone who drinks until they get sick or is out all night, especially at his age, does have a problem.

Get counseling for yourself to help you deal with this and move on with your life so you can find someone who really deserves you. Many to you and best of luck.

Valentinegirl Posted: Sep 23, 2004 07:06 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

Darling. I FM'ed you. Please let me know how you are and how you are doing and if you want to talk!

ETS.. I can't spell Kristi, sorry!

checka Posted: Sep 23, 2004 07:21 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

Oh, man. I don't even know what to say. I just want to offer some

maralynne Posted: Sep 23, 2004 07:47 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

HUGS FOR YOU

palebride Posted: Sep 23, 2004 07:48 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

He is truly leading hismelf down a dangerous path and it's a shame that he's letting it take over and ruin the best thing in his life right now.

i wish you the best! you are an amazing and insipring woman with strength to spare!

i only hope he realizes that someday!