hes leaving me.....

Original post by kdelace

Sep 23, 2004 01:21 PM

my husband decides now that he doesnt need counseling and that hes not coming tonight and that this is over!!! what an a$$hole!!

i cant believe him right now. he says that he married a 40 year old woman- referencing that i dont like to go out and have a good time.. if you knew me that is so untrue.. but his idea of a good time is coming home obliterated....sorry not my idea of having fun with my husband...

i am numb right now- ive been crying here at workall day. he was so mean to me on the phone...he has some serious issues. maybe this is a good thing but right now i have a pit in my stomach.... he says he has a drinkingproblem but so what so do all of his friends..real mature 31 year old....

the one person that cares about him and doesnt want him ending up 'dead' has given me the boot! at this point even if he had a revelation i dont think id want him back.

sucks- its my birthday next week and im going to be miserable!!!!!i know it will be bettwr for me in the long run but i am so angry at him for making his problem my fault!!!

eta- thanks for fms-i can see that i have them but i cant read them at work they are blocked!

don424 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:00 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

i would chew out the jerk he's staying with

btrflygrl Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:06 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

Posted by don424

i would chew out the jerk he's staying with

the jerk he's staying with is also an alcoholic...does no good....the friend is probably the one telling him Kristi is a '40 year old'.....

jj04 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:07 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I am so so so sorry you are going through this. I can ONLY imagine how you must feel right now. you have to realize that you can not change anyone, they are the way they are and although they may give you false hope with words, they are only words and you have to realize he will not change unless he wants to. Yes, it is terrible that the marriage is so short, but be happy that you do not have to put any kids through this. You are beautiful and young and will meet someone who appreciates you. You tried and that is all you can do, you never fail as long as you try, he however failed. Just curious..are hi friends all single? He will get tired of going out like that and live with regret, be strong and do not think it is you, you are not to blame, he is just sounds very immature. Hang in there, it will get easier with time.

dgtlsunshine Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:10 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I am so so sad to hear a marraige end.

I am glad to hear he let you out of his web. This is a sad time for you but you are truly worthy of better than this which is why I am glad to hear you move on for better.

I will pray God gives you stength and courage through this difficult time.

All the best for you and chin up sweetie.

Walk like you have tiara on your head at all times by Paris Hilton

(never thought I would be quoting her)..LOL

Sassyz75 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:18 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

goingtobemrs Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:23 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I'm so sorry. While he is still doing what he is doing, he is not going to be in the right state of mind to be able to see things clearly and will keep lying to himself and to you. You will be ok, just don't forget who you are. You did nothing wrong here. He will regret it in the end.

IrishTracy Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:27 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I am so sorry!! I wish you all the strength you need.

HearzBellz Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:29 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

You have FM, read it whenever you can

lbf404 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:43 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I am so sorry. I know its hard, but believe that you will make it throu this and that people care and support you.

OctBride05 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:43 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

i am so sorry

didianita Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:44 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

Posted by MuchInLuvMichi

omg i m so sorry, u deserve so much better..it hurts so bad now, i kno that..but ur heart will heal in time..we r all here for you

I agree!

FLaCaTaCa Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:47 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I am really sorry. I wish I had more advice for you or a way to help you. But here are some hugs and we are all here for you!!!

xjulietx Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:50 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I'm sorry you had to find out these horrible things about him AFTER the wedding. Hang in and soon you can shed him and move on. It will hurt for a while, but you will find someone more worthy in time.

Now you need to concentrate on what is the best for you emotionally.

Imagin916 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 02:51 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I am so sorry to hear about this..Hang in there sweetie! You have a good head on your shoulders and are doing the right thing for yourself. He is seeking comfort in those that have the same problems as him, and they are convincing him that his behavior is normal for a 31 yr old married man! If he cant see on his own that his perceptions are flawed, then you dont need to waste your time loving someone like that. One day he will wake up and realize that he made the biggest mistake of his life, and by that time you will have moved on and found someone who truly cares about you and your relationship. Good luck, and take care of yourself.

marymoon Posted: Sep 23, 2004 03:03 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

There's no easy way to go trhough this, but we're here for you. It's so much better to find all of this out now before the marriage continues, children, etc...

May2704bride Posted: Sep 23, 2004 03:15 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

MrsTC Posted: Sep 23, 2004 03:21 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

So sorry to hear this...you deserve to be treated better. I know it hurts but I hope some day you will look back and know that it was for the best

ambersmom Posted: Sep 23, 2004 03:24 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

I'm so very sorry about this. I agree w/Tourist - that maybe therapy will help you through the healing process and try to come to terms w/what's going on. You are going to have some very hard days ahead of you - this is just the beginning. A therapist may give you some unbiased insight. Sometimes when friends/family tell you things or show support, you really don't take to heart everything they say because they are so close to you - naturally they will be on your side and have your back. But a therapist doesn't know you personally and will help shed light on your situation. You are worth more and deserve more than this man has ever given you. Don't ever let yourself down and blame yourself or feel bad. You did not walk out on the relationship. You were more there and willing to give more of yourself than some people would have ever put out there. Hold your head high and be proud of yourself.

Sasha96 Posted: Sep 23, 2004 03:28 PM

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kdelace Posted: Sep 23, 2004 03:42 PM

Re: hes leaving me.....

thanks everyone for your thoughts and hugs! you dont understand how much i appreciate being able to post on here. it makes me feel better. i sometimes feel like the poor me post but it really helps for me to talk it out... i dont really want to talk about it to my family yet- they know whats going on but they dont know its gotten to this point. same with friends... i know someday i will look back on this and beok with it. i wish that someday was sooner rather than later....