How Bad Is It If........

Original post by Future Mulligan

Nov 02, 2007 03:00 PM

FH comes with me to try on dresses

I know some of you must be dying at the thought of it!!!!!

My Mom is not here - she is in Florida and wont be able to come dress shopping with me.......To be honest I really dont feel comfortable bringing anyone else - if I bring FMIL and FSIL I feel like I am cheating my Mom and Sister - and they don't really 'get' my style anyway. I could bring a friend but I don't really want to torture anyone and drag them around. The person who knows me best is FH and he is VERY honest but in a good way. He is the reason I want a beautiful dress in the first place! I figure its a year before the wedding and everything I try will be huge on me and all pinned up anyways so he'll have an idea of what I'm going to look like - but he won't see the finished product/the veil/the dress fitted to my body/the accessories, etc. He told me that he'll have something to picture in his head when he looks foward to the wedding and I thought that was sweet of him. He doesn't mind coming either. He said if I want him to come he is there.....Obviously I am not superstitious or traditional when it comes to things like this.....I really want him to be surprised but I feel like I would be much more comfortable with someone I trust coming with me. Its either that or I go by myself......I think that the people in the bridal salon might faint if we walk in together - I'll have to say he is my gay brother

I dont know what to do! I dont want to ruin the surprise for him - but FH said he's heard of grooms being like *** is she wearing.......which is horrible! I would die if that happened!

MsPotterhead Posted: Nov 02, 2007 04:14 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

It sounds to me like you really want to do it, and you are looking for approval here -- follow your gut and do it, regardless of what anyone says!
Some will agree with you and some won't, but do what you want to do! Have fun!

msflesch Posted: Nov 02, 2007 04:49 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

Posted by kristi313

what if you just brought him for try-on sessions, but don't buy it with him there. at least get it narrowed down to like 3 but then you make the decision yourself. so at least that way you can get the input from him and he can be surprised. just an idea

I like this idea...
Oh and no one would faint....I went to about 4 shops and 2 out of 4.... I saw FH with the bride.
Personally, I think the 'rules' are out...
Everyone should do what makes them happpy...
Its your wedding---you do things how YOU want!
Good luck!!!!

angl2001 Posted: Nov 02, 2007 05:40 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

if u go local ill go with ya!! lol i wouldnt take FH if you want it to be a surprise...but i had a friend who did it they really didnt care at all! lol your gonna look different on your wedding day anyways all dolled up!! I am sure u can find someone to go with!! good luck

cbcf Posted: Nov 02, 2007 05:49 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

Nicole....I feel the same way. I want to go dress shopping either by myself or with FH. I want him to love my dress just as much as I do. But I also have such a different style than my sisters so I know anything I love they will only tell me I look good in it and its me. Not that they love it haha. And although my best friend would go I feel my style is different yet again and IDK. My mom is annoying to go shopping with so...

I told FH i want to bring him but he said my mother would kill him so he isnt going ever with me haha.

novia26 Posted: Nov 02, 2007 05:51 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

I would just go by myself

Soon2beAlberti Posted: Nov 02, 2007 05:56 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

I personally don't want FH to see me but he will be sleeping at his parents house the night before. If u r going to see eachother before the ceremony and don't believe in superstitions...go for it. he'll give an honest opinion of what he really wants you to wear because this isn't just any old outfit. he's dreamt of it too so I think he'll be a good person to get an opinion from.

ChristineAaron08 Posted: Nov 02, 2007 05:56 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

I wouldnt bring FH b/c I would want him to be surprised.

Im sure one of your friends wont mind at all going w/ you. It could be fun.

My BIL went with my sister and I have seen girls w/ their FHs dress shopping, but I just would like FH to be totally surprised JMO

Future Mulligan Posted: Nov 02, 2007 06:39 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

i think him helping me find something that he thinks looks amazing on me is more important to me than surprising him.....who knows - maybe im strange actually, i know i am strange!
for me the whole first time he sees you thing is a little overrated - but that is just based on FH and I's relationship and every couple is different....i know that no matter what i decide its the day we are getting married and he is going to be excited to see me whether its before the ceremony or not, whether he knows what style dress im wearing, whether he saw me the night before, etc. etc. Its not that I dont want to surprise him but I dont think it would bother me if he saw me try on the dress that was 'the one'.....i think maybe this weekend i might ask him to come with me to one of the bridal salons (i would never buy a dress from this place anyway) and i'll try on the dress that i am obsessed with and all the styles i think i might like - lace, a-line, pick ups, sweetheart necklines, and trumpet - that way maybe i can figure out what style i like - and see how he feels about the styles as well.....than maybe after that i can pick out the exact dress on my own....or i might bring him everytime.....who knows!! all i know is that i want to look damn sexy on my wedding day!!

Future Mulligan Posted: Nov 02, 2007 06:41 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

oh and thank you girls for being honest about how you feel.....i like hearing other peoples opinions always - even if its not what i want to hear or what i agree with.....thanks!

MikeandJess Posted: Nov 02, 2007 06:42 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

It sounds like all the reasons that we don't want our FH's to see our dresses before our wedding is not of great importance to you. That was my only reason behind thinking you should not go with your FH but if it doesn't bother you for him to see your wedding dress (on you) before your wedding day then more power to you. If it really won't bother you then I say go for it.

Future Mulligan Posted: Nov 02, 2007 06:51 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

Posted by MikeandJess

It sounds like all the reasons that we don't want our FH's to see our dresses before our wedding is not of great importance to you. That was my only reason behind thinking you should not go with your FH but if it doesn't bother you for him to see your wedding dress (on you) before your wedding day then more power to you. If it really won't bother you then I say go for it.

yeah - its funny because i never thought that i would feel this way about him seeing me in my dress or him seeing me before the ceremony BUT now that we are actually doing it i have a different outlook on it all.....its kind of weird....i think that a part of it might be because we are spending so much money and i just want to get our moneys worth! if im dropping serious cash on a RH i want to see that cocktail room and see the food and greet people there, if i'm hiring an amazing photographer than hell yeah i want to take a lot of time with her to take great pictures and if it has to be before the ceremony than so be it and if i want FH to think i look amazing in my dress that im spending crazy $$ on than yes i want his opinion i would have NEVER EVER though i would feel that way about those things before getting engaged or planning a wedding! i know that we are both going to be very excited that day and we are getting married which is awesome and romantic and one of the best days that we'll share together so for me in the scheme of things, him seeing the dress doesnt really bother me.....who knew!!!

CNC4eva3402 Posted: Nov 02, 2007 06:56 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

On one hand I say go for it!! It's what YOU want to do and if you don't , you may sit there second thinking your choice and wishing that FH came with you.

Or, you can go yourself the first time. You may just put a dress on, absolutely LOVE it and just KNOW that FH will love you in it..and be happy that he didn't see it and that you can surprise him. If you go and really aren't sure, then bring him back with the few you've selected and see how he feels. In the end, it all kinda comes down to what WE really want anyway!

Future Mulligan Posted: Nov 02, 2007 06:57 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

Posted by CNC4eva3402

On one hand I say go for it!! It's what YOU want to do and if you don't , you may sit there second thinking your choice and wishing that FH came with you.

Or, you can go yourself the first time. You may just put a dress on, absolutely LOVE it and just KNOW that FH will love you in it..and be happy that he didn't see it and that you can surprise him. If you go and really aren't sure, then bring him back with the few you've selected and see how he feels. In the end, it all kinda comes down to what WE really want anyway!

thats a good idea too! good thinking!

bemyyoko Posted: Nov 02, 2007 08:55 PM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

i wanted to go with my FH but he wouldn't. it worked out for the best and i'm happy he'll be surprised...

but i see nothing wrong at all with going with him. he's the only other opinion that matters. have fun!!

Wifeynella Posted: Nov 03, 2007 10:55 AM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

id rather go alone. the moment he first sees you in your dress should be a WOW moment.

my idea is to bring someone who will honestly tell me i look fat in a dress and not worry about the afterwards. if my FH said i looked fat in a wedding dress, gawd the trauma!

hannahshim Posted: Nov 03, 2007 11:24 AM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

Posted by yelley77

Posted by JACSANT

lol, he totally wont be like *** are you wearing, lol. dont bring him!! lol, let him be surprised!

I agree!!

I'll go with you before i let you bring him!!

totally agree with danielle
I will go with you before you bring him!
what about bring a friend?

but then again if you do not mind I say go of it!!
do what ever your heart is telling ya!
its the best way to go~~

btw did you ask how your FH feels about this?

tlp123 Posted: Nov 03, 2007 11:26 AM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

I totally understand wanting to bring your FH. I always ask for my FH's opinions on clothes b/c I always want him to like what I buy (luckily we have more or less the same taste).

This is such an important dress, and I was really lost without him when I went dress shopping. I really wanted him to love the dress.

But he didn't want to see it before the wedding b/c he likes surprises. So I went on my own and I bought a strapless dress. Then, after I buy it, I find out he doesn't like strapless dresses.

If you want to bring him, and both of you are ok with it, do it. Definitely.

I like some of the ideas above, though, about not having him see the dress again, etc.

Jamnike Posted: Nov 03, 2007 11:28 AM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

if you think he knows your style best that go for it. you have a while she prolly will forget all the details and everything on it. and you should have to say hes ur gay brother lol ive seen grooms go dress shopping with their Fiances before :) its not a frequent thing but its nottotally unheard of! good luck dress shopping!!

ldrenckhahn Posted: Nov 03, 2007 11:34 AM

Re: How Bad Is It If........

It wouldn't be bad to take your FH with you to try on dresses. Like you said, your gowns will be all pinned up and he won't have a real idea of what it's going to look like. Also, he doesn't have to know which gown you finally choose, right? HTH