How do you communicate that you prefer cash wedding gifts?

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Member since 9/06

3217 total posts

Wedding Date:
8/11/2007 7:00 PM

Wed. Location:
The Metropolitan
NEW Re: How do you communicate that you prefer cash wedding gifts?

I have to respectfully disagree with Peteysbride... Even if that is gaining in popularity, it's still pretty tacky to me! It's also very rude to mention gifts at all in wedding invites.

Also, as a practical matter, I think the OP has already sent out her invites.

And to the OP, don't worry!!! - MOST people (especially in-state people) will give you $ for the wedding.

ETF typos.

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As I stated in my original post, Kara, I personally still think it to be a questionable practice. However it is something that has become an accepted practice so if she truly wants to go the route of asking for money, This is an accepted way to go about it. I never once said that I personally would do this. Just trying to give her ideas.

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Posted by PeteysBride

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Member since 9/06

3217 total posts

Wedding Date:
8/11/2007 7:00 PM

Wed. Location:
The Metropolitan
NEW Re: How do you communicate that you prefer cash wedding gifts?

I have to respectfully disagree with Peteysbride... Even if that is gaining in popularity, it's still pretty tacky to me! It's also very rude to mention gifts at all in wedding invites.

Also, as a practical matter, I think the OP has already sent out her invites.

And to the OP, don't worry!!! - MOST people (especially in-state people) will give you $ for the wedding.

ETF typos.

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As I stated in my original post, Kara, I personally still think it to be a questionable practice. However it is something that has become an accepted practice so if she truly wants to go the route of asking for money, This is an accepted way to go about it. I never once said that I personally would do this. Just trying to give her ideas.

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Sorry, I knew that YOU were against it... I just don't think it's really accepted in MOST circles. That was all I meant.

Maybe some people do it, but I do not believe it's generally acceptable at all. That was my point.

I knew it wasn't your style!

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Posted by PeteysBride

Honestly, I have to say asking outright for cash is tacky. Extremely tacky. Unless you are having people who totally know you and would therefore know you aren't trying to be rude, I would nix the idea because it could backfire on you and you'd get less cash or worse gifts.

What you CAN do (which I still find questionable but which is gaining popularity) is to set up a wishing well on day of wedding by the card table. Inside invites before hand, include a brief note, with a cute little poem asking for money in a cutesy way that’s not offensive. People may still think its tacky but I think they’d be far less offended because its “optional.” It becomes funny and whimsical, not all 'hand over the cash! I have bills to pay!'

[L=Invitation Script 7
This wishing well is here today for family and friends. Take an
envelope, make a wish and please drop it in. As it falls into the
well your wish, for the couple, will come true. A token for the
couple, to help them begin, will be welcomed, too. Please take the
time to make a wish before the day is through.[/L]

WISHING WELLS-asking for money politely!

Here are a few right off hand I thought were kind of cute.

Invitation Script 3
Invitation Script 3
They have their dishes and towels for two
They have pots and pans and oven mitts too
So what do you get for the Bride & Groom
Whose house is setup in every room?
Their house needs repairs and some upgrades too
But you can not register for carpet and glue.
A well that holds wishes is the way to go
So lets make it easy for all that know.
An envelope will be provided for those who have room,
To give a monetary wish to the Bride and Groom
A wishing well will be on display at the reception hall
To attach your wishes, for the couple, with love from all.

Invitation Script 9
Invitation Script 9
Our home is quite complete now,
we've been together long,
so please consider our request and do not take us wrong.
A delicate request it is, we hope you understand.
Please play along as it will give our married life a hand.
The tradition of the wishing well is one that's known by all.
Go to the well, toss in a coin and as the coin does fall,
Make a wish upon that coin and careful as you do.
Cause as the well's tradition goes your wishes will come true.
So on this special day of ours, the day that we'll be wed.
Don't hunt for special gifts but give money in it's stead.
And as you drop the envelope with money great and small,
Remember, make your wish as you watch your money fall.

[L=Invitation Script 6
Soon you will hear our wedding bell,
As Friends and family wish us well.
Our household thoughts are not brand new,
We have twice the things we need for two.
Since we have our share of dishes and bedding,
We're having instead a wishing well wedding.
But more important we ask of you,
your prayers of love and blessings too![/L]

Invitation Script 13
Invitation Script 13
To save you looking, shopping or buying.
Here is an idea, we hope you like trying.
Come to our wedding, to wish us both well.
And bring this small sack, to throw in our wishing well.
Fill it with paper all colours will do, gold is our favourite but silver will do.
Now that we have saved you, all of that fuss.
We hope you will come, and celebrate with us.

Here are what one typically looks like-has a card slot in the top like any card holder.

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OMG where did you find these poems!!!! I would love to see a person's face when they open the card and read it!

let you parents go by word of mouth for both sides of the family

tahts what we want cause i think its rude to register since we live together..but i did just for the sake of a shower

I know this may sound completely dumb (forgive me, I'm naive about weddings)....

But I always thought the 'rule of thumb' was that people bring boxed gifts off your registry to the bridal shower and cash envelopes to the wedding...... that's the way I've always seen it done... I've never been to a wedding where the couple received boxed gifts....

When people are invited to someone's shower and wedding, they generally know that a couple is young, or just starting a life together, so they tend to want to help you out by giving you toasters at your shower... and they generally want to cover their plate/plus a lil extra for the wedding.... I thought that was just common knowledge... people know weddings are expensive... esp in NY.

Sorry, just curious now... do people actually bring boxed gifts to weddings??? like blenders and toasters??...