How late is too late..

for an engagement party?

FI's family brought it up to us last night that they really want to throw us an engagement party. We don't really care about having one, but they think we 'need' one. (We've been engaged since July.)

It's a nice gesture, but my concern is that it's now almost November and our wedding is in June. With the holidays, they probably couldn't get this planned until January. Isn't that too close to our wedding?

Re: How late is too late..

I think it is too late. I think if it is a year before it is okay. But with the holidays coming up, then you will have a bridal shower and the wedding. Maybe a small dinner for close friends and family??

Re: How late is too late..

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Posted by KimberlyBride

I think it is too late. I think if it is a year before it is okay. But with the holidays coming up, then you will have a bridal shower and the wedding. Maybe a small dinner for close friends and family??

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I agree.

Re: How late is too late..

A former friend of mine met a woman at the end of January, engaged in April, engagement party in June or July, shower soon then after then got married the same November. I thought for sure that if they were having an engagement party in that short time frame then there would be no shower... well, I was wrong. IMO it was way too much for them to expect of their guests (I was in the bridal party) to attend and contribute in such a short time frame. I know this is an extreme example (and true) but I think you missed the opportunity.

Why not have a nice dinner out with maybe just family and bridal party? It would be one less thing to worry about as well.

Re: How late is too late..

IMO it's too late. In January, people will start thinking about a shower for a June wedding, not an engagement party.

Re: How late is too late..

IMO it's not too late. We got engaged on April 2 and are getting married in May. Our engagement party was in mid-July.

Re: How late is too late..

We got engaged December '03 and our engagement party wasn't until April.....it was fine and I wanted it to be in the Spring- do whatever you want!!! This only happens once in your life- you're allowed two parties for the both of you!! He, he!!

Re: How late is too late..

I dont think it would be too late - we have been engaged since June and his parents are throwing us an engagement party in December. We are in the same boat with not really wanting to have one, but they also think we 'need' one. Which is getting kind of annoying cuz this whole wedding thing is turning into Operation Get Presents to them. But I mean, how can you turn down an engagement party?? Just roll with it and have fun!

Re: How late is too late..

We opted not to have an engagement party although others felt we should have one. Instead we made save the date/engagement announcements.

I feel like and engagement party, bridal shower, then wedding can be overwhelming on guests in a short period of time. My sister on the other hand got engaged, had the pary 1 month later and then didnt get married for two years....gave her guests plenty of time to prepare! =)

But bottom line, its your occaision so you need to do what you want.

Re: How late is too late..

If someone is willing to throw the engagement party for you, then I would look at it as a profitable party and be pysched,

However, IMO you don't want your guests to feel like your wedding plans has become a gift giving event. Everytime they see you they're handing you an envelope with money or a wrapped gift. If you don't care that much about the feedback from the guests, then go with it and have fun.

Re: How late is too late..

IF we do this, I will specify no gifts. I know some people will still feel obliged, but we don't care about the gifts. I'm more worried about inconveniencing people with too many parties in too short a time. I didn't grow up in the area and we don't do engagement parties in my family so this is all a bit new to me.

I just talked to my mom though and she thinks I should let them do the party if they want to do it and not worry about it -she says they just want to be involved in some way which is probably true. (FI's mom passed away 2 years ago and his dad isn't in the picture so I think the rest of his family wants to do something to show their support in some way, which is very nice of them. )