I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

Original post by alicia6650

Oct 21, 2010 02:16 PM

so- i have been researching and looking into bpics for fh. And I have been considering what I would wear, and I have all these cute ideas. But- i keep wondering if I should be looking for stuff that covers my scars (from open heart surgery with bypass, so i have the one on my chest, the few on my belly from minor surgery and the LONG one on my leg from the bypass)

AND its not the covering it up thing that bothers me- its just making me feel bad about my scars. NOW i almost NEVER feel bad about them. But every once and a while i become VERY aware of them. ANd generally I am proud of them because of the time in my life that they represent, but again...every once and a while I feel like 'ah man.'

If i thought you girls wouldn't be grossed out (or wanted to see them!!) I would post the pics I have from the hospital so you could see where all the scars are...but they are brusied and stuff and those pics were taken the same week as the surgery, and even though for some reason i would LOVE to share them, i don't wanna make poeple sick!!!!

sigh...

itbroi805 Posted: Oct 21, 2010 03:33 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

trust me...that scar is the last thing you're FH will be looking a

DMLHeartsCRM Posted: Oct 21, 2010 03:33 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

I agree with everyone do not be shy about them. He loves you just the way you are now. And you can always have them airbrushed out in the end if you still feel that strongly about them.

adelz Posted: Oct 21, 2010 03:33 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

You're going to rock your b-pics! You seem to be a very courageous, strong, and confident chica, and in the end, all that will show in your pics, and I'm sure your FH loves you for all those reasons and many more!!!

mybabylovesmoi Posted: Oct 21, 2010 03:51 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

Posted by itbroi805

trust me...that scar is the last thing you're FH will be looking a

ITA It's up to you of course and I'm sure they can airbrush it out but those scars are there when you and your FH make HOT, SWEET LOVE lol and I think it'd be a little weird for him to not see them there when he's so used to seeing and loving your body KWIM?

alicia6650 Posted: Oct 21, 2010 03:55 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

Posted by mybabylovesmoi

Posted by itbroi805

trust me...that scar is the last thing you're FH will be looking a

ITA It's up to you of course and I'm sure they can airbrush it out but those scars are there when you and your FH make HOT, SWEET LOVE lol and I think it'd be a little weird for him to not see them there when he's so used to seeing and loving your body KWIM?

thanks- but as i read more and more responses about this, i realize that I dont think I am really worried/upset about the scars or pictures. I think that I am actually thinking about the accident and surgery a lot for some reason adn THAT is what is getting to me. I think that it was just easier (subliminally) to think I was upset about pictures and about scars, instead of about what really happened, you know?

Oh the complexity of the human mind...gotta love it!

pjc92980 Posted: Oct 21, 2010 03:56 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

wow that is some story...glad you are ok. i can imagine feeling bad about the scars and remembering the accident but like everyone says...its part of who you are and what made you the person you are today. take those bpics and show off that you havent had a perfect/easy life but you are beautiful and survived!!!

mybabylovesmoi Posted: Oct 21, 2010 03:59 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

I just wanted to add that a friend of mine was also in a bad car accident and had a lot of scars and chose to get them removed/diminished through plastic sugery. She even mentioned that so many people tried to discourage her from doing so since they are a part of her and what she survived but she hated being reminded of the accident and felt very self concious.

So it's completely a personal choice to embrace them/hide them. I could see both sides.

DCgirl82 Posted: Oct 21, 2010 04:02 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

Posted by alicia6650

Posted by NikkiB0401

wow....pretty nutty alicia! Be proud of it!

Side note: when did this happen? And it was a car accident?

It happened almost 6 years ago. I went head on with a school bus. Severed my coronary artery, ruptured my tricuspid valve and had major tears between chambers. and then minor things (comparitively) like broken ribs, punctured lung, speel and nerve damage. Had bypass and valve replacement and then all the stitch work.

According to my doctors its one of those 'we dont know how you survived this' type of things.

But go big or go home, right? If you are gonna have an accident go ALL OUT. Hit the biggest vehicle on the road, and literally almost die..lolol.

the trick is that while the accident is all done, the recovery was long and painful, and its now something i deal with every day. Meds, and frequent trips to the hosptial. Recently I had a run-in that almost ended up with me getting a pace maker- but not yet, thank goodness. Its just hard because I don't have any memory of the accident. I don't get memories until like, 3 days later. I think thats why the scars freak me out. Its like evidence of something that I don't REALLY have any knowledge of, even though it effects my life every day.

After reading this I honestly say wear those scars and be proud! Don't cover them!!! They are there because you were a miracle and tough chick and you pulled thru something major!!! Your FH will always think you look gorgeous as do all of us!

alicia6650 Posted: Oct 21, 2010 04:06 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

Posted by DCgirl82

Posted by alicia6650

Posted by NikkiB0401

wow....pretty nutty alicia! Be proud of it!

Side note: when did this happen? And it was a car accident?

It happened almost 6 years ago. I went head on with a school bus. Severed my coronary artery, ruptured my tricuspid valve and had major tears between chambers. and then minor things (comparitively) like broken ribs, punctured lung, speel and nerve damage. Had bypass and valve replacement and then all the stitch work.

According to my doctors its one of those 'we dont know how you survived this' type of things.

But go big or go home, right? If you are gonna have an accident go ALL OUT. Hit the biggest vehicle on the road, and literally almost die..lolol.

the trick is that while the accident is all done, the recovery was long and painful, and its now something i deal with every day. Meds, and frequent trips to the hosptial. Recently I had a run-in that almost ended up with me getting a pace maker- but not yet, thank goodness. Its just hard because I don't have any memory of the accident. I don't get memories until like, 3 days later. I think thats why the scars freak me out. Its like evidence of something that I don't REALLY have any knowledge of, even though it effects my life every day.

After reading this I honestly say wear those scars and be proud! Don't cover them!!! They are there because you were a miracle and tough chick and you pulled thru something major!!! Your FH will always think you look gorgeous as do all of us!

Thanks....and he does. And I literally would never think of covering them up. Some one asked me if i would cover them up with make up for the wedding...and i was like HELL TO THE NO!!! But still- its just what they remind me of sometimes that gets to me...but one time the fact that I had open heart surgery (and a mistake by people at the hotel) got us a free suite at the Borgata...so...my FH says 'babe, open heart surgery is the gift that keeps on giving...'

lol. its all good...just a little over whleming sometimes.

Soapgirl4ever Posted: Oct 21, 2010 04:08 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

you are beautiful!!!!

MrsTarricone2B Posted: Oct 21, 2010 04:11 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

You are gorgeous and the fact that you survived that means you are rediculously strong! You're like Superwoman in my eyes!!!

chris1082 Posted: Oct 21, 2010 04:21 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

I am self conscious about a much smaller scar on my knee from surgery, so I know how you feel. But you will look beautiful regardless

evita2781 Posted: Oct 21, 2010 04:32 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

Posted by itbroi805

trust me...that scar is the last thing you're FH will be looking a

ITA!!

fdnybride163 Posted: Oct 21, 2010 04:34 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

you must be one of the strongest people I have never met but those scars are not something to be ashamed of. It should remind you how strong you are and if you can get through this, then marriage should be a breeze and so should taking some sexy beautiful pics that your FH will absolutely love because he loves you so much. he knows your body so its not like your taking a mask off for the first time.

allornil Posted: Oct 21, 2010 04:40 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

Posted by alicia6650

Posted by mybabylovesmoi

Posted by itbroi805

trust me...that scar is the last thing you're FH will be looking a

ITA It's up to you of course and I'm sure they can airbrush it out but those scars are there when you and your FH make HOT, SWEET LOVE lol and I think it'd be a little weird for him to not see them there when he's so used to seeing and loving your body KWIM?

thanks- but as i read more and more responses about this, i realize that I dont think I am really worried/upset about the scars or pictures. I think that I am actually thinking about the accident and surgery a lot for some reason adn THAT is what is getting to me. I think that it was just easier (subliminally) to think I was upset about pictures and about scars, instead of about what really happened, you know?

Oh the complexity of the human mind...gotta love it!

i think you may be right. that's a really traumatic thing. even if you dont have memories of the accident, you have memories of your long recovery, being frightened, and having your family upset.

either way girl, you survived!

LoveyDovey Posted: Oct 21, 2010 05:41 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

wow Alicia....you should be proud of surviving that and show them off!

your doctors are right, after reading what happened, I was like oh my goodness how is that girl alive( I'm a PA)

wow wow wow, that is an amazing story...

your fh loves you for YOU, scars and all...I bet he even thinks its sexy!!

maybe dont take pics that FOCUS on them.,..but if they show, they show...wear what makes you feel sexy, scar or no scar showing!

SoonToBeMrsCali Posted: Oct 21, 2010 05:50 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

Alicia - you rock!

xoabxo Posted: Oct 21, 2010 06:05 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

Posted by Soapgirl4ever

you are beautiful!!!!

this!!!!!

mrsq2be Posted: Oct 21, 2010 06:18 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

Posted by DCgirl82

Posted by alicia6650

Posted by NikkiB0401

wow....pretty nutty alicia! Be proud of it!

Side note: when did this happen? And it was a car accident?

It happened almost 6 years ago. I went head on with a school bus. Severed my coronary artery, ruptured my tricuspid valve and had major tears between chambers. and then minor things (comparitively) like broken ribs, punctured lung, speel and nerve damage. Had bypass and valve replacement and then all the stitch work.

According to my doctors its one of those 'we dont know how you survived this' type of things.

But go big or go home, right? If you are gonna have an accident go ALL OUT. Hit the biggest vehicle on the road, and literally almost die..lolol.

the trick is that while the accident is all done, the recovery was long and painful, and its now something i deal with every day. Meds, and frequent trips to the hosptial. Recently I had a run-in that almost ended up with me getting a pace maker- but not yet, thank goodness. Its just hard because I don't have any memory of the accident. I don't get memories until like, 3 days later. I think thats why the scars freak me out. Its like evidence of something that I don't REALLY have any knowledge of, even though it effects my life every day.

After reading this I honestly say wear those scars and be proud! Don't cover them!!! They are there because you were a miracle and tough chick and you pulled thru something major!!! Your FH will always think you look gorgeous as do all of us!

THIS!!!! ITA!!!!

Jesebelle Posted: Oct 21, 2010 06:31 PM

Re: I am feeling bummed...UPDATED added scar pics at bottom- not for long...cuz ew

Wow! What a miracle you survived! Be proud of it! Put a garter right on that thigh! Do that shot with the pearls where you pull them to the side and show off that chest! Even if you don't use them for a book, take them!