i am SOOOOOOOOO upset

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Posted by kellybean

I wouldnt call it off...maybe she could email your sis to include her in the details etc......that way ashe is helping

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im sure she was planning on it, but was getting info together first

Laura do you think maybe with all the pregnecy hormones she's more senstive than usual? What was the relationship like between your sister & friend before this?

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Posted by Snowflake08

no, she's not upset that its a shower like event
both my mom and sister would do it if they thought i wanted one
she's upset that someone else is doing something i guess

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i COMPLETELY understand what you are going through. my FMIL offered to buy me an $800 veil. i mentioned i tried it on but was not going to buy it because of the price, and she said 'no, i want you to have this.' i was really touched and told my mom, who was like 'very nice' and that's it. two weeks later, my mom actually started CRYING and said that she thinks that i feel she can't give me the things i really want and that's why my FMIL is doing that. i was SO shocked - she just wants to be the one to do everything for me and does NOT want to feel like someone else is giving me something that she, as MOB, should be giving (i'm not saying she should give me this - i'm just saying what is in her head).

what i did, and maybe what you could do, is just sit down with her and explain it. it's not like you asked your friend for this or anything - your friend just OFFERED. if you had wanted it, you would have asked her of course, because she is your sister. just let her know that, and let her know you appreciate everything she does do. let her know you'd love it if she were involved, and if you sister has anything special in mind, you'd love to have her do it. that's what i did with my mom, and she calmed down A LOT when she realized i had not back doored her and had someone else do something for me because i thought she wouldn't or couldn't.

HTH

i kind of understand where your sister is coming from, i hated being 'invited' to stuff for my brother's wedding. . . it kind of stunk and that was for my BROTHER . . .


but i think that she should also be more understanding. . .i hope it all works out!

thanks for understanding
i explained to my sister and i just spoke to my dad
like he said, she cant plan a party for me with people from work - she doesnt know them

my friend was including my family in a work pre-wedding get together
i do think that her pregnancy hormones are getting the best of her right now, but im crying and she was like 'lets talk about this tomorrow'

we're hanging out tomorrow - i took the day off and i dont want to spend my time with her getting upset about this again tomorrow

i told her that i want everyone to be happy and happy for me and i dont want any part of my wedding getting other people upset

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Posted by Snowflake08

thanks for understanding
i explained to my sister and i just spoke to my dad
like he said, she cant plan a party for me with people from work - she doesnt know them

my friend was including my family in a work pre-wedding get together
i do think that her pregnancy hormones are getting the best of her right now, but im crying and she was like 'lets talk about this tomorrow'

we're hanging out tomorrow - i took the day off and i dont want to spend my time with her getting upset about this again tomorrow

i told her that i want everyone to be happy and happy for me and i dont want any part of my wedding getting other people upset

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you sound like you're being really rational, and also understanding of her emotional situation. just stay calm and positive like you are - everything is going to be fine in the end!!! just keep being rational!!!

I think your sister will be fine. She might have gotten a bit emotional due to the fact that she is indeed 7 months pregnant. You (from what I have seen in your post) seem mature and rational.. I highly doubt that she would think other wise!
Good Luck and have FUN with your sis tommarow!

thank you!

i need to tell my mother and she's in AC

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Posted by Kimbalina

Let your sister know that you want her to be involved, and understand that she is pregnant and busy,,, That you dont want to burden her with that responsibility of a GTG

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Well said

thanks girls
i can't stop crying and FH is upset that i'm upset and i hate when there is friction and stuff

also, which is my own issue, ive always looked to my sister for approval of everything
if she didnt like a dress, i wouldnt get it
if she didnt like shoes, i'd keep looking, etc.\

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Posted by Snowflake08

thanks girls
i can't stop crying and FH is upset that i'm upset and i hate when there is friction and stuff

also, which is my own issue, ive always looked to my sister for approval of everything
if she didnt like a dress, i wouldnt get it
if she didnt like shoes, i'd keep looking, etc.\

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aw im sorry your going through this..and don't cry! that makes me want to cry

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Posted by Snowflake08

my sister was like, 'if you wanted a shower i would have made you one' but this isnt a shower and now she's all mad

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awww. i can understand why shed be upset.
she wanted to be able to do something special for you if youd wanted it. if your family doesnt usually do showers she probobly didnt even think of it.

dont be too upset, maybe your sister can throw you a shower, and your friend can do the gathering of your friends too?

i didnt read the whole thread, i saw that and got a lil upset for you and wanted to reply. hope everything works out well.

your sis obviously loves you or she wouldnt be upset right now.

im sorry to hear that. Its a hard place to be in...

thanks
i know she loves me and i didnt and dont want a shower
its just a fun, pre-wedding get together and im just upset that she is upset

I'm so sorry you're upset Laura. I hope you're able to work things out with her tomorrow. I'm sure it will smooth over - tell her you'll have your friend call her and that way they can both plan it.

I am so sorry. I don't have much to offer, except hugs.