I have a crazy LIRR story.

So FH hadn't eaten all day so he decided to get a Smoothie before boarding his train. When he gt on the trianw as very crowded so he had to stand in the aisle next to the seats, as soon as he got there there was a bald 60 year old man in an expensive suit toogling between a newspapaer and his blackberry abruptly said
'Could you move, I don't want you spillling that on me'

FH 'Don't worry, I won't spill it'

MR. Clean: 'Could you move!!!!! I had an incident with somsone spilling something on me, and I need you to move'

FH: 'Sir, I am not going to spill this on you, if I do, I will gladly pay for the suit'

Mr. Clean: 'You couldn't afford this suit, you little punk'

FH: How do you know what I can and can't afford? (this is when Fh got pissed)

Mr. Clean: mumble mumble Long beach trash (FH actually lives like a block from garden city, but the train connected w/ a long beach train)

You have to MOVE. I am going to call the conductor abd ahve you thrown off this train!

FH: Sorry sir, but I have every right to stand here.

Mr. Clean: Stop provoking me you little punk ***! You don't know what you're getting into.

FH: Sir, the way I see it, you are the one doing the provoking here.

When the train arrived at Jamaica and Fh didn't get off for the Long Beach train as Mr Clean expected, Mr Clean proceeded to stand up, grin at FH and say 'Smile for me, would just smile?'

FH : what are you talking about?

Mr. Clean, pointing his finer right in FH's face 'Why don't you just move, you don' know what you're getting into by provoking me'

Then Mr. Clean got up form his seat, went to the area by the doors and was trying to get Fh to 'take it outside.'

Mr. Clean: COme here, Son, You don't know what you're dealing with, I've learned a few things in my 60 years, you don't know what you're getting into with me

FH: In my 23 years I've learned that having an expensive suit doesn't make you better than anyone else, and as much as I'd like you to take a swing at me, I'm above that.

and Mr. Clean fumed off


Crazy, no?