When I was younger before I met FH I had a really bad experience with a guy so I started dating and never really planned on settleing down. I dated some well off guys and for my Birthday one year this one guy gave me this Necklace. It costed more then my truck. I kept it because it was the nicest thing I have ever gotten before I got my E-Ring. My Sister wore it for her Wedding and I am going to wear it for mine. FH knows all about it and doesn't mind. This has no sentimental connection to the person who gave it to me but I love this necklace.
FH before I met him had two really serious relationships and almost went back to the girl he use to date a week before he met me. He dated her for four-five years and she gave him a Movado Watch. He now wants to wear it on our Wedding Day. I don't do doublestandards so I said if he would like too then go ahead. However, is it really a doublestandard if I don't want him too like this was a present he got from someone who at one point played a big role in his life.
What's your take? Would you be uncomfortable?
He also invited his best girlfriend to the Wedding against my wishes. I don't like her because she is his ex's bestie and after meeting her and being as nice as can be she asked FH if he would like to go to dinner with her and his ex! ALONE! LIKE REALLY? I don't want this girl to tell his ex he had the Movado on
*****FOR THE RECORD AND SO EVERYONE STOPS THINKING THE EX IS INVITED IT'S HIS EX'S BEST FRIEND WHO IS HIS FRIEND WHO IS INVITED
Am I being rediculous?
ColliMac23
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by MrsDtoB
if it has no sentimental value to either of you as you said, I really don't see a problem with wearing it. My FH has a cross his ex-girlfriend gave to him like 10 years ago, he wears it every day because he likes it, not because he thinks of her, kwim? It never even crosses my mind to think of it that way either. He will probably wear it on our wedding day too.
This is how I feel about the necklace but everytime he brings up the damn watch it's like you know the one *she* gave me. Thats why I feel like the watch has some meaning to it
HSsweethearts
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Sell both and upgrade the honeymoon or buy new jewelry. I understand if it has no sentimental value..but aI also feel like it's your wedding day and neither of you should be wearing jewelry given by a former flame. People will probably think you got the fancy bling for each other, which to me makes it really awkward. I
Loriane2010
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
I am not really a sentimental person either. BUT my honest opinion, I wouldn't wear anything from my ex boyfriend. Now don't get me wrong I still have some jewelry from my exs, and I wear it sometimes to work or when I go out. But I think you shouldn't wear the necklace and he shouldn't wear the watch. I am all about energy and vibes, and I just don't feel like that is a good energy to bring on a day like that.
PS, if I was his ex girl bestfriend, and I saw that Watch, you better believe I would go back and tell my friend. You know he is wearing the watch you gave him.
MrsDtoB
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by ColliMac23
Posted by MrsDtoB
if it has no sentimental value to either of you as you said, I really don't see a problem with wearing it. My FH has a cross his ex-girlfriend gave to him like 10 years ago, he wears it every day because he likes it, not because he thinks of her, kwim? It never even crosses my mind to think of it that way either. He will probably wear it on our wedding day too.
This is how I feel about the necklace but everytime he brings up the damn watch it's like you know the one *she* gave me. Thats why I feel like the watch has some meaning to it
Maybe thats how he thinks of it though? Just like the watch that my ex gave me... I don't think it has any meaning behind it. Maybe I shouldn't be giving you advice though, my FH's ex GF from like 10 years ago is watching our son on the wedding day!! I really have no problem with it at all. She is awesome, and they always remained friends.
eta: forgot to add this, however, if you feel like it does have meaning to him and it bothers you, he shouldn't wear it and you shouldn't wear the necklace.
VCanizalez
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by ColliMac23
Posted by MrsDtoB
if it has no sentimental value to either of you as you said, I really don't see a problem with wearing it. My FH has a cross his ex-girlfriend gave to him like 10 years ago, he wears it every day because he likes it, not because he thinks of her, kwim? It never even crosses my mind to think of it that way either. He will probably wear it on our wedding day too.
This is how I feel about the necklace but everytime he brings up the damn watch it's like you know the one *she* gave me. Thats why I feel like the watch has some meaning to it
See if this is really botjering U *She gave me* then maybe he is the same way wiht ur necklace!
Im sorry but I dont think you should be saying something to him ESPECIALLY because YOU have a Necklace from UR X too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
HSsweethearts
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
I know I'm bad, but I kind of want to see this necklace
ItalianBella1122
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
I also would be uncomfortable with wearing something from an ex on my wedding day, but that's just me. Personally, I'd rather wear the $40 sterling silver necklace FH gave me for our first Valentine's Day than wear something from an ex, even if it was fancier. But that's simply my opinion, and I don't think you or FH are wrong for doing it, as long as you are both comfortable with it.
That being said, absolutely, if you wanted to wear this necklace, you cannot get upset with him for wanting to wear the watch. I think you answered your own question when you said 'I don't do doublestandards.' I'm sure he wants to wear the watch for much of the same reason you want to wear the necklace: its just a really nice piece of jewelry.
About the ex being invited to the wedding - I think that's an ENTIRELY separate issue from the watch/necklace thing. I have been to lots of weddings and I have no idea what watch the grooms wore or if they were even wearing a watch. And how would this girl even know that this was the very same watch? Even still, I think the issue of inviting the ex is something else that needs to be worked out between you and FH.
ColliMac23
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by Loriane2010
I am not really a sentimental person either. BUT my honest opinion, I wouldn't wear anything from my ex boyfriend. Now don't get me wrong I still have some jewelry from my exs, and I wear it sometimes to work or when I go out. But I think you shouldn't wear the necklace and he shouldn't wear the watch. I am all about energy and vibes, and I just don't feel like that is a good energy to bring on a day like that.
PS, if I was his ex girl bestfriend, and I saw that Watch, you better believe I would go back and tell my friend. You know he is wearing the watch you gave him.
EXACTLY! I don't want the ex to know he wore it. I mean my Jeweler is giving me whatever I want to borrow the day of but he also has the same necklace so there really is no difference if I don't wear the necklace because I can borrow the same one from our jeweler So I don't care I would be fine with not wearing the necklace if it did bother him.
ColliMac23
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by VCanizalez
Posted by ColliMac23
Posted by MrsDtoB
if it has no sentimental value to either of you as you said, I really don't see a problem with wearing it. My FH has a cross his ex-girlfriend gave to him like 10 years ago, he wears it every day because he likes it, not because he thinks of her, kwim? It never even crosses my mind to think of it that way either. He will probably wear it on our wedding day too.
This is how I feel about the necklace but everytime he brings up the damn watch it's like you know the one *she* gave me. Thats why I feel like the watch has some meaning to it
See if this is really botjering U *She gave me* then maybe he is the same way wiht ur necklace!
Im sorry but I dont think you should be saying something to him ESPECIALLY because YOU have a Necklace from UR X too!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
And that's why I didn't say no I said it was his decision
ColliMac23
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by ItalianBella1122
I also would be uncomfortable with wearing something from an ex on my wedding day, but that's just me. Personally, I'd rather wear the $40 sterling silver necklace FH gave me for our first Valentine's Day than wear something from an ex, even if it was fancier. But that's simply my opinion, and I don't think you or FH are wrong for doing it, as long as you are both comfortable with it.
That being said, absolutely, if you wanted to wear this necklace, you cannot get upset with him for wanting to wear the watch. I think you answered your own question when you said 'I don't do doublestandards.' I'm sure he wants to wear the watch for much of the same reason you want to wear the necklace: its just a really nice piece of jewelry.
About the ex being invited to the wedding - I think that's an ENTIRELY separate issue from the watch/necklace thing. I have been to lots of weddings and I have no idea what watch the grooms wore or if they were even wearing a watch. And how would this girl even know that this was the very same watch? Even still, I think the issue of inviting the ex is something else that needs to be worked out between you and FH.
It's not the ex it's the ex's best friend who is also his friend
shelbylove918
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Crashing... Its just a necklace and its just a watch.. It doesnt matter where you got it from if it doesnt mean anything to you guys then it shouldnt matter if you wear it or not.. especially if you are both fine with it. who cares what anyone thinks... I really dont think its a big deal since they are not in the picture anymore
In regards to your ex's best friend being invited to the wedding I think its great for her to come and see you guys get married.. that way she can tell her friend how inlove and beautiful you looked that day.. that will really stick it to her
AugustFeather
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Personally I would NEVER wear anything my ex gave me period. Wedding Day would be an absolute NO for me. He needs to sell that watch!!! and YOU need to hock your ex jewelry too!!! Go together... pool your cash and save it!
Chelechel1
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by RaeloveMeg
Crashing.... Do you plan on getting each other wedding gifts?? Id say get him a watch a better one than the Movado and be sure to give it to him the night before the wedding and he'll wear it the day of And you'll be happy and get your way haha!! ((This is def something I would do))
ITA! Great idea!!
ColliMac23
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by HSsweethearts
I know I'm bad, but I kind of want to see this necklace
It's like this one except no colors to it all platinum
Im sorry but this is my HONEST OPINION Totally Disrespectful OF You and HIM to wear things that your xs gave you ON ur wedding daY!!!!! OMG I will NEVER think of doing that... and I know my Fh never will do it too...
I think u need to Sell ur necklace and he needs to sell his watch....
Das it... Simple....
Why keeping something from ur X's?!!!
ETA:
Ohh and regarding the X... I AM SOO AGAINS HAVING X'S ON THE WEDDING, I THINK THAT IS A BIG NO NO!!! So NO, Why would U want an X in ur wedding??!!!
ditto!
Jennielee15
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by RaeloveMeg
Crashing.... Do you plan on getting each other wedding gifts?? Id say get him a watch a better one than the Movado and be sure to give it to him the night before the wedding and he'll wear it the day of And you'll be happy and get your way haha!! ((This is def something I would do))
This! And rethink the necklace... JMHO
GlitterBox24
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
I keep everything I've ever gotten. They were part of my life and who I was and one day when I'm 90 I want to remember my WHOLE life and have all my stuff. After being with FH for 5 hours I just got around to removiing old pics from my laptop and saviing them on cd, becuz. Still had pics of exes and my fh lives with me and uses the laptop but to us the past is the past and made us who we are. My fh has a cartier watch an ex gave him, seriously I have no extra cash to buy him another one and thje watch is HOT!!!!!! So he wears it all the time I don't care, but in your case it bothers you so you should explain it to him and ask him if he would perfer that you not wear the necklace since you feel umconfortable wth him wearng the watch.
Chanwich
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Honestly, neither of those things would bother me. You both kept the gifts because they are nice things that you wouldn't normally have the chance to buy, not because either of you have an attachment to the person who bought them for you. I would say you should both wear them, or both not wear them, but I definitely think it would be a double standard for you to wear it but not allow FH to. JMO though
ColliMac23
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by GlitterBox24
I keep everything I've ever gotten. They were part of my life and who I was and one day when I'm 90 I want to remember my WHOLE life and have all my stuff. After being with FH for 5 hours I just got around to removiing old pics from my laptop and saviing them on cd, becuz. Still had pics of exes and my fh lives with me and uses the laptop but to us the past is the past and made us who we are. My fh has a cartier watch an ex gave him, seriously I have no extra cash to buy him another one and thje watch is HOT!!!!!! So he wears it all the time I don't care, but in your case it bothers you so you should explain it to him and ask him if he would perfer that you not wear the necklace since you feel umconfortable wth him wearng the watch.
THANK YOU! You jus put a lot in perspective
wishingwell1230
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by RaeloveMeg
Crashing.... Do you plan on getting each other wedding gifts?? Id say get him a watch a better one than the Movado and be sure to give it to him the night before the wedding and he'll wear it the day of And you'll be happy and get your way haha!! ((This is def something I would do))
