When I was younger before I met FH I had a really bad experience with a guy so I started dating and never really planned on settleing down. I dated some well off guys and for my Birthday one year this one guy gave me this Necklace. It costed more then my truck. I kept it because it was the nicest thing I have ever gotten before I got my E-Ring. My Sister wore it for her Wedding and I am going to wear it for mine. FH knows all about it and doesn't mind. This has no sentimental connection to the person who gave it to me but I love this necklace.
FH before I met him had two really serious relationships and almost went back to the girl he use to date a week before he met me. He dated her for four-five years and she gave him a Movado Watch. He now wants to wear it on our Wedding Day. I don't do doublestandards so I said if he would like too then go ahead. However, is it really a doublestandard if I don't want him too like this was a present he got from someone who at one point played a big role in his life.
What's your take? Would you be uncomfortable?
He also invited his best girlfriend to the Wedding against my wishes. I don't like her because she is his ex's bestie and after meeting her and being as nice as can be she asked FH if he would like to go to dinner with her and his ex! ALONE! LIKE REALLY? I don't want this girl to tell his ex he had the Movado on
*****FOR THE RECORD AND SO EVERYONE STOPS THINKING THE EX IS INVITED IT'S HIS EX'S BEST FRIEND WHO IS HIS FRIEND WHO IS INVITED
Am I being rediculous?
ColliMac23
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by Chanwich
Honestly, neither of those things would bother me. You both kept the gifts because they are nice things that you wouldn't normally have the chance to buy, not because either of you have an attachment to the person who bought them for you. I would say you should both wear them, or both not wear them, but I definitely think it would be a double standard for you to wear it but not allow FH to. JMO though
Even though she then two days later asked FH to go get dinner with them?
I wouldn't wear if I told him not to wear his I am not like that
Jennielee15
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by ColliMac23
Posted by MrsDtoB
if it has no sentimental value to either of you as you said, I really don't see a problem with wearing it.
My FH has a cross his ex-girlfriend gave to him like 10 years ago, he wears it every day because he likes it, not because he thinks of her, kwim? It never even crosses my mind to think of it that way either. He will probably wear it on our wedding day too.
This is how I feel about the necklace but everytime he brings up the damn watch it's like you know the one *she* gave me. Thats why I feel like the watch has some meaning to it
Wait a second, he refers to the watch as the one 'She' gave him? Oh no! He definitely needs a new watch! And about the friend. You can't really depict which friends he invites to his own wedding. I had a girl friend of FH that I hated and I was dreading her being at our wedding. But I was willing to look past it and invite her for his sake. Luckily she dug her own pathetic grave and they aren't friends anymore- thank the lord!
ColliMac23
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by Jennielee15
Posted by ColliMac23
Posted by MrsDtoB
if it has no sentimental value to either of you as you said, I really don't see a problem with wearing it. My FH has a cross his ex-girlfriend gave to him like 10 years ago, he wears it every day because he likes it, not because he thinks of her, kwim? It never even crosses my mind to think of it that way either. He will probably wear it on our wedding day too.
This is how I feel about the necklace but everytime he brings up the damn watch it's like you know the one *she* gave me. Thats why I feel like the watch has some meaning to it
Wait a second, he refers to the watch as the one 'She' gave him? Oh no! He definitely needs a new watch! And about the friend. You can't really depict which friends he invites to his own wedding. I had a girl friend of FH that I hated and I was dreading her being at our wedding. But I was willing to look past it and invite her for his sake. Luckily she dug her own pathetic grave and they aren't friends anymore- thank the lord!
Yea he will remind me that she bought it but I think it's because he doesn't want to wear something she gave him if it will piss me off?
I hope she would do the same! I was so nice to her and she invited him out to dinner without me the next weekend with her herself and his ex I was like *** is wrong with this girl
Chanwich
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by ColliMac23
Posted by Chanwich
Honestly, neither of those things would bother me. You both kept the gifts because they are nice things that you wouldn't normally have the chance to buy, not because either of you have an attachment to the person who bought them for you. I would say you should both wear them, or both not wear them, but I definitely think it would be a double standard for you to wear it but not allow FH to. JMO though
Even though she then two days later asked FH to go get dinner with them?
I wouldn't wear if I told him not to wear his I am not like that
Sorry, I was really confused by the original post, so the ex that gave him the watch asked him out for dinner? then of course I would not want him to wear it! I thought it was the ex's friend that invited him out. my bad! In that case, I think you could still wear the necklace, but it would be weird for him to wear the watch.
Jennielee15
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by ColliMac23
Posted by Jennielee15
Posted by ColliMac23
Posted by MrsDtoB
if it has no sentimental value to either of you as you said, I really don't see a problem with wearing it.
My FH has a cross his ex-girlfriend gave to him like 10 years ago, he wears it every day because he likes it, not because he thinks of her, kwim? It never even crosses my mind to think of it that way either. He will probably wear it on our wedding day too.
This is how I feel about the necklace but everytime he brings up the damn watch it's like you know the one *she* gave me. Thats why I feel like the watch has some meaning to it
Wait a second, he refers to the watch as the one 'She' gave him? Oh no! He definitely needs a new watch! And about the friend. You can't really depict which friends he invites to his own wedding. I had a girl friend of FH that I hated and I was dreading her being at our wedding. But I was willing to look past it and invite her for his sake. Luckily she dug her own pathetic grave and they aren't friends anymore- thank the lord!
Yea he will remind me that she bought it but I think it's because he doesn't want to wear something she gave him if it will piss me off?
I hope she would do the same! I was so nice to her and she invited him out to dinner without me the next weekend with her herself and his ex I was like *** is wrong with this girl
Yeah, a real piece of work. You could try killing her with kindness. Unfortunately this doesn't usually work with stupid! They don't seem to get the sarcasm! Haha
ColliMac23
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by Chanwich
Posted by ColliMac23
Posted by Chanwich
Honestly, neither of those things would bother me. You both kept the gifts because they are nice things that you wouldn't normally have the chance to buy, not because either of you have an attachment to the person who bought them for you. I would say you should both wear them, or both not wear them, but I definitely think it would be a double standard for you to wear it but not allow FH to. JMO though
Even though she then two days later asked FH to go get dinner with them?
I wouldn't wear if I told him not to wear his I am not like that
Sorry, I was really confused by the original post, so the ex that gave him the watch asked him out for dinner? then of course I would not want him to wear it! I thought it was the ex's friend that invited him out. my bad! In that case, I think you could still wear the necklace, but it would be weird for him to wear the watch.
No you were right The best friend asked him to go to dinner with the ex and her with out me
ColliMac23
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by Jennielee15
Posted by ColliMac23
Posted by Jennielee15
Posted by ColliMac23
Posted by MrsDtoB
if it has no sentimental value to either of you as you said, I really don't see a problem with wearing it. My FH has a cross his ex-girlfriend gave to him like 10 years ago, he wears it every day because he likes it, not because he thinks of her, kwim? It never even crosses my mind to think of it that way either. He will probably wear it on our wedding day too.
This is how I feel about the necklace but everytime he brings up the damn watch it's like you know the one *she* gave me. Thats why I feel like the watch has some meaning to it
Wait a second, he refers to the watch as the one 'She' gave him? Oh no! He definitely needs a new watch! And about the friend. You can't really depict which friends he invites to his own wedding. I had a girl friend of FH that I hated and I was dreading her being at our wedding. But I was willing to look past it and invite her for his sake. Luckily she dug her own pathetic grave and they aren't friends anymore- thank the lord!
Yea he will remind me that she bought it but I think it's because he doesn't want to wear something she gave him if it will piss me off?
I hope she would do the same! I was so nice to her and she invited him out to dinner without me the next weekend with her herself and his ex I was like *** is wrong with this girl
Yeah, a real piece of work. You could try killing her with kindness. Unfortunately this doesn't usually work with stupid! They don't seem to get the sarcasm! Haha
suzie411
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
it pains me to say that I probably wouldn't wear the necklace and I most definitely would not want him to wear the watch. Im sure the necklace is gorgeousssss, and may even look slamminnn with your dress. But i don't think I could do it.
JMO - I don't think it would be right to ask your FH not to wear the watch, if you are wearing the necklace. And if that ex bestie, girl, friend of ex person that will be there, if she does now about the watch, and notices it. . .she will probably be reporting it back to her friend.
jettahot
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Posted by WeezyGirl2354
I wouldnt wear the necklace and i wouldnt be okay with him wearing the watch.
Like another bride said - get him a new watch and maybe mention to FH that you would like a new necklace.
You are starting a new life with FH - whether or not the necklace has meaning it's still from someone from your past.
Just my take on it.
ITA
merbride
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
sentimental value or not...neither one of you should wear those items, esp not on your wedding day. get something new that had a new memory behind it!
pixietina
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need an HONEST Opinion (Kind of Long)
Maybe the necklace really does bother him and he just doesn't want to say anything. I think you both shouldn't wear jewelry your exes gave you. Weddings are about starting a new life together. Leave all the past stuff behind you.
