I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Original post by MrsBrags7706
Hi Girls,
An 06'er here...For those of you who had their weddings-many congrats. For the upcoming weddings, good luck!
I do have a problem....and I need help! My cousin who is 1 year younger than me is engaged and asked me to be in her bridal party for her May 08 wedding. I didn't have her in my BP, but she asked me, so I accepted. She made it sound like we were going to shop for so many dresses, but when it came down to it, she basically in not so many words said this 1 dress was the dress and that was it. It was form-fitting [which I have no problem with] but it clinged all over [I'm not hevay but curvy, and short] so I think it would look better on someone that was 5'9 or 5'11 and a TWIG!, not for someone who is short & curvy. Additionally, it WAS halter but not the thicker halter strap which I feel more comofrtable in and bustier. The wost part is that - starting near the boob area, and going down to the stomach there are HOLES in the dress, bare holes, in which their putting 1 material of sheer in it, which will basically do nothing. I cannot wear a strapless bra [I always feel more comftorable with a bra than without]. So I just told her that I didn;t think she needed to rush into it and buy it 9 1/2 months before her wedding and she should look around more especially in the Fall when new styles for Spring come out. Needless to say, she said 'well I like it' with her MOH agreeing. Then, we walk over to my car, she says hello to my DH who is waiting in the car for me, and she said to him that I was uncomfotorable in the dress & didn't like it. So saying that, she knew about my discomfort and self-consiousness and she just ignored it. Then the following day she called me and said she bought all 4 dresses and that was it. I became a bit annoyed with her over the phone because I firmly believe that she should have brought all the girls down there to try on different styles of dresses and even so - if she would have asked me at least once- 'do u feel comfortable in this?' and also told me even if it was the dress, and thats it, she didn't have to buy it, now she expects the $ asap. How does she know that I wasn't using a credit card where I wouldn't have to worry about paying for it for 7 weeks? I mean, she knew my circumstances because I was out of work for a while, just got back, and money was tight.....I was overall very annoyed with her and I feel very uncomfortable in the dress & I really do not want to wear it! I know when it came down o my wedding, I brought all my girls down their and made sure they felt comfortable in it, and I even had the change the skirts a couple times, but their comfort was most important to me!]
I REALLY need you're girls help! Furthermore, this is the dress. Lastly, I don't think it's AT ALL appropriate for a wedding. It's not even considered a bridesmaids dress.
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Is she serious about that dress??
The only thing that I would say is, unless you want to drop out of the bridal party, wear the dress - do your best to make it through the day (it is only 8 hours of your life) and just realize that SHE is going to be the one looking back at pictures of that dress.
And you'll have a costume to wear for years to come!
mycrayon1
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Posted by Colette
Lets make it easier for you to decide. Ladies, was i kidding? Dress-4 views Profile view!
Thank you for the picture! I couldn't see it by the description (Im at work and blocked from the link)
That is an interesting dress. I would def not be able to wear it and if the bride was that adimant about it I think I would have to drop out of the BP
tink79
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
She can't be serious with that dress!!! My cousin picked a backless dress for her wedding and I was soo uncomforable, but I felt bad backing out because of the dress. When it came to the day of the wedding and dealing with not only the dress but other issues I wish I would have just said 'I'm sorry I can't wear that dress' and backed out in the beginning. You should just tell her that you can't wear that dress and back out. It gives her plenty of time to replace you (hey if the girl she replaces you with fits in your dress sell it to her!)
sweetdreamz1181
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
no offense but why would someone pick a dress like that.... it looks like a 17yr old prom dress to show off their boobs!!!!!
Aug07OFCbride
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
I wasn't sure what to think until you started describing the dress and then i saw the pic and EW! I would NEVER wear that. How trashy! Is this for real??? Who would actually use this as a BM dress. Let her know you care about her but you have standards about what youll do and that dress is way too revealing for you! YIKES!!!
Id have to drop out.
Sorry about all this!
Colette
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
I was curious for a BOYS opinion. Here's what FH had to say:
'Its ok, the BMs will all get their money back on the day of the wedding. In singles.'
jgl
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Posted by Colette
I was curious for a BOYS opinion. Here's what FH had to say:
'Its ok, the BMs will all get their money back on the day of the wedding. In singles.'
your FH ROCKS!!!
Kara and Todd
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
That dress is awful. When I first read your post, I was on the fence, thinking - it's her wedding, just suck it up and wear what she wants. Then I saw that. Not only would I personally not wear that, I would also think it disrespectful to my extremely-soon-to-be husband to dress that way. No one needs to see that part of me.
If that's the dress she insisted on, I'd actually find a way to politely excuse myself from the wedding.
It would be one thing if it were strapless and you didn't like that or something like that -- but this is basically asking you to expose yourself!
Kara and Todd
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Posted by jgl
Posted by Colette
I was curious for a BOYS opinion. Here's what FH had to say:
'Its ok, the BMs will all get their money back on the day of the wedding. In singles.'
your FH ROCKS!!!
Kara and Todd
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Posted by ant n tilde
ok when i first read your post i thought that you should just deal with it and wear the dress. I didn't take my BMs with me to pick out the dress that I wanted but I made sure that they would all be comfortable. and to think, i felt bad making them wear a strapless dress!
BUT THAT WAS BEFORE I SAW THE DRESS! #1 NO ONE should have to wear that EVER #2 If the wedding was at my church I can almost guarantee that the BMs would not be allowed in #3 I know everyone is joking about saying that your DH won't let you wear it, BUT, my FH would DEFINITELY not let me wear it so that is not a crazy idea
good luck, let us know what she says!!
ITA.
And as for #3 - I'd never even think of wearing that dress in public. It'd be pretty disrespectful to the man I'm marrying!
sweetdreamz1181
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Posted by jgl
Posted by Colette
I was curious for a BOYS opinion. Here's what FH had to say:
'Its ok, the BMs will all get their money back on the day of the wedding. In singles.'
Maybride519
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
BACK OUT!!!! I agree with the other girls....tell her exactly why...
MrsBrags7706
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Posted by Pencils
I just told my husband about this, and he said that you should say, 'But Mom, I'd look like a WHORE! Do you want your little girl to look like a WHORE?!?' It was pretty funny when he said it.
QUOTE]Posted by MrsBrags7706 I dunno, my mom is kinda like you just need to deal w. it and its not right to drop out...the whole 9 yards...................... she says its the right thing to do, its a horrible dress but to suck it up for one night. but i dont want to wear it! i'll PAY for the dress just so i dont have to wear it!
LMFAO!
MrsBrags7706
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Posted by jgl
Posted by MrsBrags7706
I really don't know how to come out & tell her tho besides say that I'm uncomtorable and she KNEW that before she bought it! And then she wonders why people are calling her 'bridezilla' .
Dear slutty cousin,
I am writing to inform you that I can not and WILL not wear that dress and look like a hooker at your wedding. Therefore, I have enclosed the money for the dress and will not be in your BP.
Love, your cousin with much better taste that that of a hyiena
OMG!!!!
MrsBrags7706
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Posted by Colette
I was curious for a BOYS opinion. Here's what FH had to say:
'Its ok, the BMs will all get their money back on the day of the wedding. In singles.'
hahahahahah LMFAO!! thats the funniest thing i've heard all day!
MrsBrags7706
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Thanks girls.... I guess I'll wing it & let you know her response! Maybe I can say my husband doesnt feel comfortable with me wearing it either. I'm gunna show my mojm these posts too, so she doesnt think I'm crazy.
My cousin IS saying she would add 1 PIECE of sheer material, for the holes, but to me, i still have issues with it!
jgl
Posted:
Member since
Re: I need some help from you 07'ers - Tough Bridal Party situation
Posted by MrsBrags7706
Thanks girls.... I guess I'll wing it & let you know her response! Maybe I can say my husband doesnt feel comfortable with me wearing it either. I'm gunna show my mojm these posts too, so she doesnt think I'm crazy.
My cousin IS saying she would add 1 PIECE of sheer material, for the holes, but to me, i still have issues with it!
huh? you didnt like my letter idea? hahaha
GL and let us know how it goes!!!! and i agree sheer material is NOT enough!!! a new dress - that would be enough!