I was talking to a friend re: church cost,

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Posted by Nina

Yeah....$700 for the church. Not including the rehearsal, pre cana...any of that

Ahh...but I think its worth it..I adore my church!

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It is worth it Nina...just think of how beautiful you will look walking down that long aisle and seeing Peter's face at the end!!!

My church cost is $300 to get married there, $115 for an organist, $115 for a singer and $50 for pre-cana.

That's crazy what your church is charging.

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Posted by Shorty McBride

Everyone is entitled to an opinion, and I commend you for posting yours. I'm sure others out there feel the same way, but didn't have the guts to post.

I'm just surprised at the difference amongst parishes, that's all. And I don't think its right that there's a donation of $X-amount for this, $X-amount for that, and THEN you're expected to tip. I attend church and they get my 'donation' weekly - I am a little irritated that parishoners and non-parishoners are charged the same 'mandatory donation' for a wedding ceremony....and the priest is driving a new Lexus.

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i can understand your curiosity about the cost difference. i allueded to that in my previous posts... larger parishes usually charge more because of the amount of people that are in the parish = higher operating costs. most parishes depend on the generosity of parishoners to meet operating costs. some itemize the donation so if you don't need the musicians for example, or the altar servers, you can deduct that from your total donation. others ask for a flat fee. many parishes charge more for non-parishoners as they are not regular parishoners, some charge the same... i am sure it all depends on the parish's financial situation. my parish is in deep debt and i am more than happy to help via my donation. also, i don't think the car that the priest drives is reflective of where your money is going. they have family and friends... they are people too! they make next to nothing and dedicate their lives to serving the community... i would want a nice car!

also, FYI: you are not required to tip in addition to the donation. i've never heard of that... it might be nice to give a small gift if you personalyl know the priest and extend an invite to the reception (althouh they probably won't come due to a busy schedule). good luck with your planning!!

As the aunt of an altar server, I know that these kids often miss little league games or other activities in order to serve at a wedding. Since they are too young to drive, a parent also has to drop them off and pick them up, and/or sit in the church through a wedding. Their families have to rearrange their own plans so that the child can fulfill his or her commitment to serve.

My nephew only became old enough to serve at weddings this summer. At the wedding he did, he received the $10 in an envelope which was part of the required church fee, plus the family gave him a $10 tip. He was thrilled to be recognized for his time and service. A friend of his who served at another wedding did not receive a tip, even though I know the parish suggests a tip on the sheet given to brides and grooms when they book the church. To add insult to injury, not only did this child arrive early to make sure that everything was in place, but ended up getting stuck in the church for at least a half hour after the wedding was over because the receiving line was blocking the room where he needed to leave his robe. He didn't want to be rude and push his way through the bride and groom, so he and his mother waited until everyone was outside. All total, he was at the church for 2 hours. (This was just for a ceremony, not a full Mass.)

Altar servers do not receive a paycheck from the church for the daily/weekly Masses they serve at, yet they go out of their way to make sure they fulfill their commitments. I would hope that brides and grooms who think nothing of buying lots of 'extras' for their receptions would remember and recognize these children for their services.