Is it fair to ask BMs to chip in....?

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by Regal Beagle

I in no way equate their care for me by how much they spend. They have been complaining about everything. I cannot even get my BMs all together to get measured for their dress.

Their lack of care and effort has offended me. Call it selfish , but I do not think it is right for the people in BP or my family to complain about everything. From buying a dress, shoes to having to take the day off of work etc. My brother is complaining about renting a tux. He is walking me down the aisle. I thought he would be honored! The complaining has made me sad and feel like they don't care.

One said 'you are bothering me too much about this dress'. Then I am called a Bridezilla!
The dress takes 6-8 months to come in. I don't think I am being unfair.

The least they can do is not make ME feel bad about it. Can't they not talk about it in front of me?

Yes, that hotel is over priced, but I only went there based on their suggestions for a good location for everyone (they are complaining about that too). I wouldn't have expected them to pay for the whole thing. Just whatever they thought they could chip in since they suggested that place..

I am going to look at other places that I can afford on my own even if they get mad about the location.


Thanks for the advice,

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There is no need to get upset...I mean you ask a question like that and we are just giving you honest answers...Don't ask for opinions if you only want to hear what you want to hear. You only told us about the hotel, we don't know all the background information, we don't know how they've been acting, things that have been said and so on, we are only going on what you said.

Sorry that your bp is giving you trouble. But honestly this happens to ALOT of people. That is why they say to wait a little while after you are engaged to ask people in your bp, just to see how they react to your engagement and their attitude towards you. Peoples closest friends whom they never thought would act a certain way do so during the wedding planning. You can never predict these things.

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Posted by Regal Beagle

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Posted by Espo22

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Posted by Regal Beagle

I in no way equate their care for me by how much they spend. They have been complaining about everything. I cannot even get my BMs all together to get measured for their dress.

Their lack of care and effort has offended me. Call it selfish , but I do not think it is right for the people in BP or my family to complain about everything. From buying a dress, shoes to having to take the day off of work etc. My brother is complaining about renting a tux. He is walking me down the aisle. I thought he would be honored! The complaining has made me sad and feel like they don't care.

One said 'you are bothering me too much about this dress'. Then I am called a Bridezilla!
The dress takes 6-8 months to come in. I don't think I am being unfair.

The least they can do is not make ME feel bad about it. Can't they not talk about it in front of me?

Yes, that hotel is over priced, but I only went there based on their suggestions for a good location for everyone (they are complaining about that too). I wouldn't have expected them to pay for the whole thing. Just whatever they thought they could chip in since they suggested that place..

I am going to look at other places that I can afford on my own even if they get mad about the location.


Thanks for the advice,

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There is no need to get upset...I mean you ask a question like that and we are just giving you honest answers...Don't ask for opinions if you only want to hear what you want to hear. You only told us about the hotel, we don't know all the background information, we don't know how they've been acting, things that have been said and so on, we are only going on what you said.

Sorry that your bp is giving you trouble. But honestly this happens to ALOT of people. That is why they say to wait a little while after you are engaged to ask people in your bp, just to see how they react to your engagement and their attitude towards you. Peoples closest friends whom they never thought would act a certain way do so during the wedding planning. You can never predict these things.

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Your right. I just got upset when someone called me selfish when they know nothing about my character. I asked this question for a reason. I had doubts.
I appreciate everyone's advice as long as it isn't mean
I believe you can say soemthing without being mean.
I guess you can say I am fed up with the whole thing.....par for the course I guess........


My bridal party has been my friends since grade school and I never expected this. I found their dresses for $125.00. I am working the best I can with them.

Thanks

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Posted by bonniejd

what about the wingate inn in garden city, i think they have suites for around $300 and in the same general area

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Posted by Regal Beagle

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Posted by jenafee

I'm in the same boat as you, but I'm paying for all my BM's and myself to stay in a bridal suite the night before my wedding.
If you don't have the cash to swing the expense, then why don't you find something cheaper? If you want to stay at the Garden City hotel, you can't expect them to pay for a room that will cost them a lot of money on top of the extra expenses to be in the party. How about getting a few rooms that will be in your budget? Taking pics in a suite won't do as much justice as taking pics in the hotel lobby such as the Garden City hotel.
HTH and good luck!

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Thanks.....that's what I am probably going to do. I am going to look at a place closer to the church. My girls live in Queens and LI and someone suggested The Garden City Hotel and The Inn at Great Neck.

I have also looked at the Holiday Inn and some other place in Queens, but they looked run down and over priced too.

Maybe I can get two connecting rooms.

Where do you plan on staying if I may ask?

Thanks again

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