Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
iam having 100-125
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Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
Original post by Iluvpoodles
So I've only been angaged a week but I really feel bad for my poor fiancee because I haven't exactly been pleasant lol. We has originally wanted a small intimate destination wedding. It was between disney world and Antigua. Unfortunately, I have a sick family member who is in a wheel chair and after discussing it with my family they decided it would be too much for her to travel. I still don't understand since the most she would be there is overnight. So now we are stuck with having a normal wedding here. People are saying have the church wedding but go out to a small restaurant or something after but I feel stupid doing that. I'm gonna sit there in my wedding dress? We started looking at halls and figure we will have between 60-90 people. I do not look forward to planning this at all and everyones noticed how unhappy I've been. I keep looking and hearing about old friends of mine, hs people having these huge weddings and is this the norm these days. Sorry but I think spending 70 grand and having a bridal party with 8 people in it is just stupid. The wedding I'm going to next week is costing 80 grand with 300 people. My financee is thinking I don't want to marry him bc of how unhappy I've been. I have to add I work full time and am in grad school also working on my thesis so I'm under alot of stress right now. So can I have a normal church ceremony and not a normal reception at a big hall? Am I gonna look wierd having at a hall with not 300 people. I don't even want a bridal party and really eveytime someome mentions something about this wedding I feel like screaming shut up. We could always just go to disney, get married and have something after when we get back but then is there gonna be drama bc no people not being there![]()
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
Posted by Iluvpoodles
No I defentially need to have her in attendance. It is my grandmother who is like a second mother to me, raised me for half my childhood, lived with her, etc so of all the people who need to be there, she would. I guess and and my fiancee will have to have one here and make the best of it.
If its your grandmother then yeah i would do it here for her. Also you said you wanted Disney, is it in the castle or whatever lol where they do receptions? if so just know that they are pretty pricey. I saw it on food network one time and showed a bunch of weddings there and they said the prices and was expensive. So you could end up paying the same amount someone here pays for 200 guests. Unless you meant somewhere else in Disney but from what I know this is where they do the weddings in Disney
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
Posted by marrymybestfriend
Posted by Iluvpoodles
. Sorry but I think spending 70 grand and having a bridal party with 8 people in it is just stupid.
this is pretty much 85 % of the people on here.
i know we are having 25 people in our wedding party
Yup! I'm one of the stupid ones I suppose.
Anyway... its your wedding... you do whatever you want. You can have a small wedding in a hall if you would like. They have rooms that are smaller just for smaller parties. You could also do it in a really nice restaurant and book them for a party... they do all the same stuff a regular reception would do. Literally... you can do anything your heart desires. And if anyone thinks your plans are stupid... well screw them.
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
09's crashing.
I am having a small wedding. I didn't want to have more than 70 people at my reception because I want to be surrounded by the people that I love. I am not having a church wedding, we are getting married at the RH but that's mainly because I am catholic and FH is jewish, so to be neutral we went with the RH.
I think smaller weddings can be more intimate and you shouldn't be sad about a small wedding. There are plenty of halls that will accomadate a smaller party. My min is 70.
And like you, I have no wedding party. So I know about planning a small wedding. If you have any questions feel free to FM me. But remember that the wedding day is about being with the love of your life not how many people are there or where you are having a reception.![]()
I am having a small wedding. I didn't want to have more than 70 people at my reception because I want to be surrounded by the people that I love. I am not having a church wedding, we are getting married at the RH but that's mainly because I am catholic and FH is jewish, so to be neutral we went with the RH.
I think smaller weddings can be more intimate and you shouldn't be sad about a small wedding. There are plenty of halls that will accomadate a smaller party. My min is 70.
And like you, I have no wedding party. So I know about planning a small wedding. If you have any questions feel free to FM me. But remember that the wedding day is about being with the love of your life not how many people are there or where you are having a reception.
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
ughh, it kinda su*ks to have your heart set on something then have it taken away... for example, you were dreaming of a destination wedding. I honestly dont think you will be completely happy & satisfied unless you get that...
my friend is getting married in Jamacia...just her & her fiance are going along with another couple to witness the marriage...they are spending a week down there...then, in June, she is have a super small reception back home with a short ceremony for her close family that would like to see her get married...maybe you could do something like that?
my friend is getting married in Jamacia...just her & her fiance are going along with another couple to witness the marriage...they are spending a week down there...then, in June, she is have a super small reception back home with a short ceremony for her close family that would like to see her get married...maybe you could do something like that?
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
I am having a small wedding also...75-95 people. There are a few reasons we decided to have a small affair. First and most important we are paying for the wedding ourselves. Neither set of parents can really help us. I didnt want to be stressed out trying to pay for the wedding and not enjoy the experience. Another reason we kept it small is becaue i want to be able to enjoy everyones company and remember who was there. I just wanted to be surrounded by our closes friends and family. My thinking was if i didnt speak to you within the last month you dont need to be invited...was that to mean?
Like everyone said, most catering halls have rooms to accomodate parties of different sizes. I have the Hill room at Westbury manor which holds 100 people. I am still unsure about a wedding party. My daughter is 11 so i definetly want her to stand with me. My delima is do i choose my cousin who i grew up with to also stand with me or my best friend who i've known since high school and is the godmother to both of my children. I dont want to hurt anyones feelings but I dont want a 'wedding party'.....ADVICE PLEASE
Like everyone said, most catering halls have rooms to accomodate parties of different sizes. I have the Hill room at Westbury manor which holds 100 people. I am still unsure about a wedding party. My daughter is 11 so i definetly want her to stand with me. My delima is do i choose my cousin who i grew up with to also stand with me or my best friend who i've known since high school and is the godmother to both of my children. I dont want to hurt anyones feelings but I dont want a 'wedding party'.....ADVICE PLEASE
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
You're not alone... you just have a lot going on and prob shouldn't spread yourself so thin. Do what is right for you and your FH. Remember that this is suppose to be fun or at the very least enjoyable, but it is suppose to be about the two of you. No one else. If you want something smaller and less extravagant, so be it. You can still have something very sophisticated and fun.
Everyone has a different idea or vision of their wedding day. Why don't you try a place that does Wedding Packages...they have all the vendors in one place, so you don't have to keep returning to meet diff vendors at diff times on diff days. Just take 2 hrs to finalize items at one place with all or most of your vendors. It is so much less stressful and can be equally fun and beautiful in the end. You can still customize the package to your liking and switch out vendors you may not want. I am pretty busy and so is my FH, so this is something we are considering. Not to mention we live in Brooklyn and traffic to LI is hellish most of the time. Its not for everyone, but it does make this process enjoyable rather than stressful.
HTH
Everyone has a different idea or vision of their wedding day. Why don't you try a place that does Wedding Packages...they have all the vendors in one place, so you don't have to keep returning to meet diff vendors at diff times on diff days. Just take 2 hrs to finalize items at one place with all or most of your vendors. It is so much less stressful and can be equally fun and beautiful in the end. You can still customize the package to your liking and switch out vendors you may not want. I am pretty busy and so is my FH, so this is something we are considering. Not to mention we live in Brooklyn and traffic to LI is hellish most of the time. Its not for everyone, but it does make this process enjoyable rather than stressful.
HTH
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
I am having a small BP and a small reception. I am inviting about 80 and expecting 60.
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
Posted by charondita
I am having a small wedding also...75-95 people. There are a few reasons we decided to have a small affair. First and most important we are paying for the wedding ourselves. Neither set of parents can really help us. I didnt want to be stressed out trying to pay for the wedding and not enjoy the experience. Another reason we kept it small is becaue i want to be able to enjoy everyones company and remember who was there. I just wanted to be surrounded by our closes friends and family. My thinking was if i didnt speak to you within the last month you dont need to be invited...was that to mean?
Like everyone said, most catering halls have rooms to accomodate parties of different sizes. I have the Hill room at Westbury manor which holds 100 people. I am still unsure about a wedding party. My daughter is 11 so i definetly want her to stand with me. My delima is do i choose my cousin who i grew up with to also stand with me or my best friend who i've known since high school and is the godmother to both of my children. I dont want to hurt anyones feelings but I dont want a 'wedding party'.....ADVICE PLEASE
I have two childhood friends that I love more like sisters...and I am godmother to one of their daughters. One only had her cousin stand up for her and the other didn't have a BP...married at city hall. I was not offended by either.. just happy for them. On the other side, I have 3 sisters and a bro...my bro is in my wedding, but i will only ask one sister. I am literally flipping a coin (in front of them). Neither can afford to be in a BP so I am trying to be fair to them as well. My advice would be ask the person closest to you... not out of obligation. Or the one who will HELP you more, b/c you will need assistance. JMO
HTH
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
Posted by Nina1010
Posted by charondita
I am having a small wedding also...75-95 people. There are a few reasons we decided to have a small affair. First and most important we are paying for the wedding ourselves. Neither set of parents can really help us. I didnt want to be stressed out trying to pay for the wedding and not enjoy the experience. Another reason we kept it small is becaue i want to be able to enjoy everyones company and remember who was there. I just wanted to be surrounded by our closes friends and family. My thinking was if i didnt speak to you within the last month you dont need to be invited...was that to mean?
Like everyone said, most catering halls have rooms to accomodate parties of different sizes. I have the Hill room at Westbury manor which holds 100 people. I am still unsure about a wedding party. My daughter is 11 so i definetly want her to stand with me. My delima is do i choose my cousin who i grew up with to also stand with me or my best friend who i've known since high school and is the godmother to both of my children. I dont want to hurt anyones feelings but I dont want a 'wedding party'.....ADVICE PLEASE
I have two childhood friends that I love more like sisters...and I am godmother to one of their daughters. One only had her cousin stand up for her and the other didn't have a BP...married at city hall. I was not offended by either.. just happy for them. On the other side, I have 3 sisters and a bro...my bro is in my wedding, but i will only ask one sister. I am literally flipping a coin (in front of them). Neither can afford to be in a BP so I am trying to be fair to them as well. My advice would be ask the person closest to you... not out of obligation. Or the one who will HELP you more, b/c you will need assistance. JMO
HTH
My cousin lives in Maryland so she can only due but so much from there but i think she will be there for me more than my best friend. Oh did i mention my best friend is getting married Oct of 2010. she doesnt have as much planning becasue she is having a destination wedding
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
I'm looking to have a reception of around 100 people with no bridal party.
What's so wrong about having something in a restaurant like you suggested? Just do what makes you comfortable..Don't worry about what your family members have done.
What's so wrong about having something in a restaurant like you suggested? Just do what makes you comfortable..Don't worry about what your family members have done.
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
I hear ya on the whole destination thing. I would have looooved to do that. and being a travel agent it would have been greeat except my fiance has a HUGE family and there was no way we could have done it without it gettin crazy..cause I have done travel for a destination wedding for a VIP client of mine and the amount of people and everything involved was insane.. everytime I see a wedding on the water I sigh, ![]()
but, I had to do what was best for everyone attending and wanted our close family and friends to be able to spend that special day with us...
I have been to an intimate disney wedding before and it truley is beautiful... I feel like if you have ur heart set on it .. u should go just the 2 of you and get married there.. then when u come home have a small reception party for everyone else... :) it would be the best of both worlds.. Sometimes I feel like I just want to alope and have it be just the 2 of us!!! lol.. :)
I have been to an intimate disney wedding before and it truley is beautiful... I feel like if you have ur heart set on it .. u should go just the 2 of you and get married there.. then when u come home have a small reception party for everyone else... :) it would be the best of both worlds.. Sometimes I feel like I just want to alope and have it be just the 2 of us!!! lol.. :)
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
Check out the Sans Souci in Sea Cliff if your looking for the anti wedding mill. Very quaint and they only do one wedding at a time .
Good Luck
Good Luck
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
Theres nothing wrong with having a smaller wedding. You don't have to have a big bridal party either - just a maid of honor and a best man. I am getting married at the west sayville country club. It's quaint and cozy and they only require a minimum of 75 people - so it definitely can be done...
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
Would it be possible for you to have a mini-destination wedding? Or would that be too much traveling as well?
I ask because Conneticut has some beautiful places.. I'm going to check out Amarante, Saint Clements Castle (looks GORGEOUS!), Woodwinds, and Grassy Hill Lodge in a couple of weeks. If you need contact info or anything for any of them, please let me know.
I ask because Conneticut has some beautiful places.. I'm going to check out Amarante, Saint Clements Castle (looks GORGEOUS!), Woodwinds, and Grassy Hill Lodge in a couple of weeks. If you need contact info or anything for any of them, please let me know.
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
We are doing a small wedding in my uncle's back yard. Granted he lives in Muttontown & his back yard is huge. We are only having maybe 60 people.It will be like a backyard pool party/ BBQ without the BBQ. We are all big time drinkers and partiers, it will still be small and intimate. I'm not even stressing over shoes.....I'm going to wear any. We caught some $h!t from our family and our response was' you will be invited........you can always choose not to come!'You be you! Do what is best for the two of you. After all it's about the two of you right?
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
You need to do what will make you happy.
FH and I always said we wanted a destination wedding. We love our family and could not stomach the thought of getting married without them by our side.
Fh's dad was sick alot and we knew he couldn't travel, so we are having what I consider a small wedding here. We really couldn't get away with doing something for only 20 ppl locally.
FH's dad passed 2 week ago and FH and I are again debating if we want to go through with the whole reception again. It was never really what we wanted, but we did what we felt was right at the time.
So, no one can tell you what to do. There is no reason you have to invite 300 people. you can do whatever will make you happy.
perhaps a simply ceremony with a justice of the peace so your family can attend is what is right for you. There is no need for a fancy dress or reception then. And after that you and hubby can have a romantic ceremony on the beach for just the 2 of you.
FH and I always said we wanted a destination wedding. We love our family and could not stomach the thought of getting married without them by our side.
Fh's dad was sick alot and we knew he couldn't travel, so we are having what I consider a small wedding here. We really couldn't get away with doing something for only 20 ppl locally.
FH's dad passed 2 week ago and FH and I are again debating if we want to go through with the whole reception again. It was never really what we wanted, but we did what we felt was right at the time.
So, no one can tell you what to do. There is no reason you have to invite 300 people. you can do whatever will make you happy.
perhaps a simply ceremony with a justice of the peace so your family can attend is what is right for you. There is no need for a fancy dress or reception then. And after that you and hubby can have a romantic ceremony on the beach for just the 2 of you.
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
Posted by Rosalind_75
dont feel bad about wanting a small wedding.
we are looking to have a small one too
125max
we are paying for it and want it to be a fun time with our family and friends
we are doing our best to keep the cost low
ITA. Plus, the room I have at Westbury Manor the max it hold is 130 so that's my motivation to keep it between 120-125.
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
ok try to calm down and cheer up!!
I think if you want to have a small wedding with 90 people, you should! The way I see it, I want to be able to look back on my wedding day and remember it as the happiest day of my life and that I wouldnt change a thing about it. If you want to keep in on LI, and make your family happy, i'm SURE you will be able to find a place to accomadate you and make your wedding day beautiful!!
I could never have a wedding with 300 guests. I come from a really big family with lots of cousins and aunts and uncles and nieces...etc etc...but between the 2 families I still dont think we could even come up with 300 ppl!!! At least not 300 who would even know both of our names! lol The biggest thing with us is that WE'RE paying for this wedding. So we're hoping to have approx. 160 guests (that includes my 15 nieces....that might sound big to some ppl but again, I have a really big family and these are all ppl, family and friends, that we have to have there). We're not going over that number bc we want to put our hard earned $$ into other things...like a place to live after the big party!!!
I think if you want to have a small wedding with 90 people, you should! The way I see it, I want to be able to look back on my wedding day and remember it as the happiest day of my life and that I wouldnt change a thing about it. If you want to keep in on LI, and make your family happy, i'm SURE you will be able to find a place to accomadate you and make your wedding day beautiful!!
I could never have a wedding with 300 guests. I come from a really big family with lots of cousins and aunts and uncles and nieces...etc etc...but between the 2 families I still dont think we could even come up with 300 ppl!!! At least not 300 who would even know both of our names! lol The biggest thing with us is that WE'RE paying for this wedding. So we're hoping to have approx. 160 guests (that includes my 15 nieces....that might sound big to some ppl but again, I have a really big family and these are all ppl, family and friends, that we have to have there). We're not going over that number bc we want to put our hard earned $$ into other things...like a place to live after the big party!!!
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Re: Is or has anyone not had a big reception?
Posted by Lu2700
ok try to calm down and cheer up!!
I think if you want to have a small wedding with 90 people, you should! The way I see it, I want to be able to look back on my wedding day and remember it as the happiest day of my life and that I wouldnt change a thing about it. If you want to keep in on LI, and make your family happy, i'm SURE you will be able to find a place to accomadate you and make your wedding day beautiful!!
I could never have a wedding with 300 guests. I come from a really big family with lots of cousins and aunts and uncles and nieces...etc etc...but between the 2 families I still dont think we could even come up with 300 ppl!!! At least not 300 who would even know both of our names! lol The biggest thing with us is that WE'RE paying for this wedding. So we're hoping to have approx. 160 guests (that includes my 15 nieces....that might sound big to some ppl but again, I have a really big family and these are all ppl, family and friends, that we have to have there). We're not going over that number bc we want to put our hard earned $$ into other things...like a place to live after the big party!!!
I'm calmed down now lol. We booked the hall yesteday and plan on 100-125 even though it will prob be less like 80-90. We are paying for it also and this place is not cheap with their prices..but we both love it and have started saving towards it. Me and him don't even know 300 people to invite lol.
