Is or has anyone not had a big reception?

So I've only been angaged a week but I really feel bad for my poor fiancee because I haven't exactly been pleasant lol. We has originally wanted a small intimate destination wedding. It was between disney world and Antigua. Unfortunately, I have a sick family member who is in a wheel chair and after discussing it with my family they decided it would be too much for her to travel. I still don't understand since the most she would be there is overnight. So now we are stuck with having a normal wedding here. People are saying have the church wedding but go out to a small restaurant or something after but I feel stupid doing that. I'm gonna sit there in my wedding dress? We started looking at halls and figure we will have between 60-90 people. I do not look forward to planning this at all and everyones noticed how unhappy I've been. I keep looking and hearing about old friends of mine, hs people having these huge weddings and is this the norm these days. Sorry but I think spending 70 grand and having a bridal party with 8 people in it is just stupid. The wedding I'm going to next week is costing 80 grand with 300 people. My financee is thinking I don't want to marry him bc of how unhappy I've been. I have to add I work full time and am in grad school also working on my thesis so I'm under alot of stress right now. So can I have a normal church ceremony and not a normal reception at a big hall? Am I gonna look wierd having at a hall with not 300 people. I don't even want a bridal party and really eveytime someome mentions something about this wedding I feel like screaming shut up. We could always just go to disney, get married and have something after when we get back but then is there gonna be drama bc no people not being there