if she wont listen to you then yes definitely talk to FMIL. i don't think its bridezilla because she will be in all of your pictures!
alli3131
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Re: is this brideszilla?
Personally I wouldn't tell her she cant color her hair. Then again I have been dying my hair since her age (and no my hair hasn't fallen out yet) a good hair stylist can style it the day of to make it look somewhat normal. I was in a wedding (as an adult) with balck hair with blond thick streaks....the girl who did my hair made it look amazing and not freaky at all.....so why not pay for her hair the day of.
ammie1016
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Re: is this brideszilla?
Personally I wouldn't want my neice,nephew cousin or whoever in my pictures with RED GREEN OR PURPLE HAIR. I would tell her that she couldn't be in it. Or better yet let your FMIL tell her that she needs to go to a normal color other wise she can't be in your wedding. I know for my wedding my cousin who is 17 is a punk rocker. His hair was longer than mine for god's sake. I asked him please you need to do something with your hair for the wedding you can't just go and have to take pics like that. Well the day of my wedding when I saw him I was so happy. He is a good looking kid when his hair is all out of his face. He actually cut about 4 inches off of it and he was out of his face and looked really good. I told him that after all the major pics are taken he could put on his Converse and let his hair out. LMAO HE WAS SO HAPPY!
Hawks Nest
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Re: is this brideszilla?
I would def spewak to her and ask if she could at least hoild off until after the wedding. Maybe offer to pay to have it fixed now and then tell her as her wedding gift you will pay to put the purple streaks back in. Sometimes you have to bribe kids, lol.
Nitania13
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Re: is this brideszilla?
I don't necessarily think it's your place to tell her what color to dye her hair. It would however be appropriate for your FH to talk to his sister. I do think though that if she is dyeing her hair purple it's obvious she doesn't want to be accepted. There is definitely something going on with this girl that she's deliberately doing things to turn ppl off to her, and you telling her you don't like her hair will only feed into the exact thing she's aiming to accomplish. IMO I would either have my FH talk to her, or just not include her in pictures where she's going to be very noticeable. Her mother obviously can't be bother properly guiding her, but that doesn't mean you have to ruin THOUSANDS of dollars in pictures that are going to last forever. If her brother can't talk some sense into her then I'd let her make her own decision about her hair, and I'd make my decision to exclude her from pics where she's going to be very noticeable. Courtesy is a two way street.
MsPotterhead
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Re: is this brideszilla?
I teach middle school, and it is very popular for the kids to dye their hair all different colors. Most of the kids with the multi-colored hair are the smartest and nicest kids in the school. If you could tell her nicely that you totally understand her need to express herself, but you would greatly appreciate it if just for your wedding she could do something a little more traditional because you are going for a traditional look. If she calls you boring, agree, say 'Yes I am boring. Can you dye it back just for this one weekend?' If she's adamantly opposed to it, I don't think there is much you can or should do.
mosh424
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Re: is this brideszilla?
Posted by KittyGags
LOL!! I would tell her to stop it or to find another wedding to be in...
I mean a brunette going blonde, FINE, but purple?
I agree with you totally!!!
you are not being a bridezilla at all
Brat23
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Re: is this brideszilla?
I would ask her nicely to hold off until after the wedding and then after that go nuts go green!
Ask FH to talk to her or to his Mom and politley say this is a formal affair one day you/she will understand when she gets married!
No your not Zilla! If she tells you to buzz off and she's coming to the wedding orange then go Zilla on her! LOL
Deeglasser
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Re: is this brideszilla?
i think her behavior is totally normal for a 12 year old... she's experimenting with style, and she's probably very confused right now! there's actually probably a lot worse she could be doing at that age! i think if it's important to you, i would have a conversation with her in person- not through anyone else but you... if you go through her mom the mom may make you look like the bad guy... i would tell her that you think she has a really unique sense of style, but if you can come to a compromise for your wedding... remember, it's not what you say, but how you say it! good luck!
MJDoc12
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Re: is this brideszilla?
Honestly..it is 10000000% NOT your place to tell her A THING. I'm sorry but the cardinal rule when it comes to weddings and marriage---you deal with YOUR family and he deals with HIS family. If anyone is going to say anything--it should be your FH.
If you do it--you WILL look like a bridezilla to his family and if you try the whole 'well if you don't change it--you can't be in the wedding' you are asking for a world of hurt and you could risk causing HUGE complications in the family and putting your FH in the middle. Is it seriously worth all that? I can honestly tell you its not. So what if she has some purple streaks? Don't sweat it! She's not the focus of pics--you and your FH will be. If her hair is whacky that day, you just make sure the photographer doesn't take a lot of pics of her.....there ya go...problem solved.
Just remember that as you get closer to the date you really need to pick and choose your battles carefully cause this is the point where things get VERY stressful---the last thing you need is to add to it with this.
GL!
sophisticat13
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Re: is this brideszilla?
I don't think it's bridezilla at all for you to want her to have a normal hair color for your wedding. It's not just the pics, it's also walking down the aisle, making an entrance at the reception, the first dance (if you are having your BP join you and your DH). To a certain extent, I think that the BP accentuates the bride and groom...if it was me I'd be upset also...but I think it's your FH's job to tell her what you and he want and expect. I agree that your telling her might cause problems...it also depends on how important this issue is to you. It it's very important, then you have to ask yourself if you are willing to risk not having her in your BP if she refuses to change it....but... then you will look like a bridezilla to his family!! Be careful with this issue because you don't want to alienate his family right now.
