Okay they are really starting to p*ss me off!! First of all a few months ago my FMIL said 'oh you should really get the touch of vienesse it would be so nice' I said to her 'are you going to give us the extra $550 for it because if not then we are not getting it' she shut up then she said it about 3 more times on different occasions. We are having a very nice cocktail hour, then salad, pasta, entree, wedding cake and dessert...if you need more food after that then you need to go to Overeaters Annomis (sp?) and I am not ordering food that will just be wasted so we can be showie ( I am not like that but FH family is)!! So that is not the end of ot then I find out tonight that she had my FSIL call FH and said to him that FMIL really thinks we should have the touch of vienesse!! What nerve she has!!! Let me tell you she is not even helping us out with the wedding. Even with the RD (after us saying millions of times how it was so much because we have to have all the nieces and nephews go) she is only supposivly giving us $300.
It doesn't end there...then last week at my bridal shower my FSIL asked me if we can sing 'happy birthday' and have a cake for her daughter at our reception!! Umm hello it is MY WEDDING!!! Okay it will be her first birthday and her birthday is the day before...but first of all do you think a 1yr old will even realize it and also we had our date set 2 1/2 yrs in advance..then she gets pregnant and plans her c section on the 11th and I even said to her do you realize her first birthday will be the day before our wedding?? I don't even mind so much the singing part ...it's more the bringing out a cake part. Don't you think that is rude?? Am I the only one you thinks this is wrong?
So Ladies am I wrong to be p*ssed??? I can't even sleep now because I am so angry and FH is a wimp ( I love him but he is not a fighter) and will let them walk all over him!!! I don't know what to do?!
Sunny
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Re: I've had it with the in-laws!!
Sorry you have to deal with that crap- it is unfair. I agree inlaws stink!
ChristineC68
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Re: I've had it with the in-laws!!
I would be more then pi$$ed if I were you!!!
It seems like your Future IL's should put & shut up.
If you want viennese hour - pay for it. You are right it is not neceissary.
I wouldn't even sing happy birthday to the one year old. It's YOUR wedding day!
I don't even know what to say about the IRS refinancing situation - I just hope somewhere along the line it works out for you.
butterfly20
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Re: I've had it with the in-laws!!
sorry, it seems like alot of people have problems with their inlaws... for the birthday girl.. i personally would have planned a cake or something myself, its a little nervy of her to ask especially since the daugter wont even remember...
sept20yay!
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Re: I've had it with the in-laws!!
give the cake at the morning after brunch! If you are having one. That is what we are doing for FH's grandfather who turns 79 a few days after the wedding. It will be a surprize for him on that day and won't in any way detract from our own. That, to me, is a fair compromise.
since I'm not really confrontational...i would listen...say that I would consider it...and then just not do it...
If FH feels it is necessary...he can ask his mother for the money...
also FH should talk to his sister...ITs YOUR (collective YOUR) not the baby's birthday party...
but let FH do the talking...you don't want to start off on the wrong foot
jd414
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Re: I've had it with the in-laws!!
Sorry you are having the problems I am starting to have! I haven't even really begun planning yet and my FMIL is asking me to do this and that because someone she knows has a daughter that did this and that...UGGGGGGGG. They should just stay out of it. I already said no to b'day cakes for the 'twins'!! Her grandchildren's b-day is not even until 2 days later!!!!!!!! ILs, just leave us alone!!!
I think most of the time they are really trying to help...by giving their opinion...unfortunately it doesn't always coincide with ours
Julybaby
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Re: I've had it with the in-laws!!
I just want to make a comment about the birthday cake idea at your wedding. How many people from your family knows this one-year-old? Since not even half of your guests know this 1-year old, I think singing Happy Birthday and having a cake is very inappropriate. It may make some guests feel uncomfortable and make some comments. Are you having a RD? If so, could you sing Happy Birthday then? Or, as someone suggested, at the brunch the day after? I believe that celebrating this girl's birthday during your reception is totally inappropriate.
The Original 2nd-time-around
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Re: I've had it with the in-laws!!
As far as the birthday, what I would probably do is have the DJ/band say something like 'this song goes out to XXXX for her 1st birthday' and then you can dance with her (along with everone else. Wouldn't have them clear the dance floor for this!) Maybe like the Beauty and the Beast song or something that your neice might recognize, but it's not a 'kiddie' song
JMO
Imagin916
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Re: I've had it with the in-laws!!
My friend is going through the same thing with her mother, and her mother doesnt want to pay either. Her parents are not paying for ANYTHING and she wants the viennese (which is $14 extra a person)!!!!!
Word of Advice: Your wedding is on a Sunday night. I dont know your guests, but in general half of your guests will be gone before the viennese food is out.
maybride
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Re: I've had it with the in-laws!!
VERY rude! Unfortunately, there are many people like that. Sometimes you can't be shy around these people. Thankfully, there are many wonderful in-laws but those few give them all a bad name.
pumpkin79
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Re: I've had it with the in-laws!!
That is absolutely obsurd! singing to the 1 yr old on YOUR wedding day, is she out of her mind? There is no reason to feel guilty or upset if you dont do this and you shouldnt do it. It is you that has to be happy that day and the center of attention, speak up and let your fil's know how you feel.
palebride
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Re: I've had it with the in-laws!!
this is your wedding day - and you and your FH are the ones who make the decisions. and if they want to celebrate a birthday - have them do it on their own time - not during the most important day of your life! That is ridiculous and i cannot believe they would even think to ask that! Don't back down!!!
