Here's my dilemma that I would love your suggestions on & I thought a poll would be fun. I have cousins of all ages and my dad tends to have a very traditional attitude about most things. So he thinks all kids should be invited, how can I not invite my cute little 3yr old cousin?? But I totally disagree, I think an 'adult' wedding is nicer and really who wouldn't want to get a sitter and enjoy themselves? Or use the sitter we plan on providing. Apparently not my uncle, my dad thinks he wants his kids there, he is flying from out of state, ect. I also would love advice on, if I decide that little kids are not invited then where should the cut off be? 13, 15, 18? And then you have the 18yr old with the 15 & 13 yr old sisters ahhhhh
Summer07Bride
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
I did have kids at my wedding, but there were only about 8 of them and most were 12 and over.
I feel as though you have three options 1. invite children 18 and over 2. invite all children 3. invite no children
If you are close to your relatives (cousins) over 18, then I suggest you do the first. If not, just do not invite any children. Most people will understand weddings are expensive and most do agree that it really is an adult affair. As a compromise, perhaps offer babysitting at the hotel for children under 18?
little34
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
We didn't want to invite any kids under 18 but FMIL was so mad that we even suggested it that we had to allow it....FH has a lot of cousins under 18....but the RH doesn't allow kids under 5...so we lucked out with that...
Colleen214
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
we didn't really have a hard and fast rule about it, but we invited all our first cousins. Since we are the oldest in both our families, our first cousins range in age from 2 years old to 21, and they're all invited. We also happen to be very close with them, so that makes a huge difference. Other than that, no other kids.
gettinghizitched
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
I vote no kids. The only kids at my wedding will be the RB and the FG. Sounds messed up but most parents would like the day or night off anyways. So don't feel bad about not inviting children to your wedding.
CourtandJon
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
We are having the cut off around 13 years old. Little kids just don't know better- but by 13 they do (or they should!) so hopefully they will be able to just sit quietly throughout the ceremony.
So I voted No
Drv0716
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
For me, it's not a simple yes or no. I have absolutely no problem with children being at weddings. The only young child in our families is our 2 year old daughter & obviously, she will be invited. We invited children (all happen to be ages 8+) who are important to us like my 3 first cousins that I've grown up with, & close family friends. We left off the children of co-workers & distant relatives because we don't even know their children.
If we were to have a 16-18+ wedding it would leave out a lot of people who are important to us. I think the decision of inviting children should vary depending on the situation & the couple's wishes.
soon2BMrsDee
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
I would go with 13 and over - since the 13 yr olds can police themselves and parents can still have a good time... I have a 13 yr old brother and he's the youngest - with my FHs bro (18) being the next youngest... It would be Romper Room rather than a wedding - what's the fun in that?
Also ask your Uncle what HE thinks - no offense - but you have to get it from the horses mouth, not from what someone else thinks that person would want...
jeanne08
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
We were having the same debate. I think people might get offended if you say only kids over 12 or something like that. And then they also have the burden of finding a sitter for their kid. So here's what we decided. First cousins only (for me they range in age from their 30's down to 7yrs)Some of my cousins have kids of their own but we are not including them(we don't have enough tables!) And we are inviting FH niece and nephews (all under 14 yrs old, there are 6 of them). We are not inviting any of our friends children.
HTH
FuTuRe MrS MaZz
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
Posted by MPAS
I voted YES, kids are the life of the party and they are human too, they deserve to go to weddings and functions and experience things like that
I totally agree!! I dont get this whole 'adult reception' idea... Since when have so many people hated children? I guess those that voted no dont plan on having any children of their own huh??
AS
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
Posted by FuTuRe MrS MaZz
Posted by MPAS
I voted YES, kids are the life of the party and they are human too, they deserve to go to weddings and functions and experience things like that
I totally agree!! I dont get this whole 'adult reception' idea... Since when have so many people hated children? I guess those that voted no dont plan on having any children of their own huh??
I know right!!! I really dont get the big deal on not having kids at the wedding. If my little cousins and nephew werent allowed to my wedding then its somewhat pointless, I wouldnt live with myself. What are the poor kids going to do at home with the babysitter, when they can experience something totally different from the everyday. Im sorry but that is how I was raised, my parents took me and my 2 sisters to EVERY event when we were younger, thank goodness!!!
danibrwneyes
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
OK here is what I did. Our nieces and nephews are being invited. My cousins are all older then me and have kids...so the second cousins under 18 are not being invited. So that leaves 2 over 18 for me to be invited...There was one 2nd cousin who is 15 who I wanted there so I asked her to be a bridesmaid. BUT my invites have not gone out yet and I know I am going to either get phone calls or have to make the phone calls when I get responses back. If I had all the kids it would have added over 30 more to my list and I could not do that.
Newport Bride
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
There will be very few kids at my wedding, just the ones in the wedding party pretty much. Other than that, I vote NO.
Dani731
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
I am having no kids under 14.
onl the three in the BP.
SugaBeans
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
there will be no kids at my wedding besides my immediate cousins. Other than them, everyone else will be 21 and older. i feel that with an open bar, it makes it an adult party.
AntNick1101
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
No to the whole kid thing. The only kid's that will be at the wedding are those in the wedding party and immediate family member kid's.
klanghan
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
Unless they are one of my flower girls, no one under 18. It's an easy cut off line.
klanghan
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
djones44
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
Thank you so much for all your replies and suggestions, After reading all of these I feel a lot better about my feelings on NO kids, for a little bit I didnt know if i was being cold. Since you have all been so helpful, i have one other question, if i invite a cousin who is 18 yrs old can you invite him without inviting his younger brother and sister who are i think will be about 15 and 13? (I'm not close with them, they live in VA and I havent seen them in a few years) TIA!!
LnF0405
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
Posted by soon2BMrsDee
I would go with 13 and over - since the 13 yr olds can police themselves and parents can still have a good time... I have a 13 yr old brother and he's the youngest - with my FHs bro (18) being the next youngest... It would be Romper Room rather than a wedding - what's the fun in that?
Also ask your Uncle what HE thinks - no offense - but you have to get it from the horses mouth, not from what someone else thinks that person would want...
How did you tell the parents that we are only letting kids over 13???? Do we put in the invites do we call or the we insert a note???? I am having the same dilema.
JulyBride14
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Re: kids vs. no kids at the wedding, with poll!
We had no children at our wedding. Between the both of us, we have a million little cousins and we couldn't invite all of them. Also, it was a late wedding. I'm glad we decided against it though. Everyone (all parents included) had a carefree & fun time.
