lipglossjunky73

I saw a reply to a post before....You are in the same situation I'm in. My FI has 2 kids also and pays child support. People, including my family, 2nd guess the whole thing I'm sure. But when you know you're meant to be together, you just know. Definitely alot of struggles, but in my mind.....always worth it!

How old are your FI's kids?

We should start our own thread....InstaFamily....LOL!!

Hi!!!

Their birthdays are in January - both girls - one will be 15 on the 1st, the other will be 9 on the 22nhd...

The xmas has been tough - its the poorest we've ever been because FH was laid off for a month and then took a job with a serious pay cut...

We should start an Instafamily thread!

it has its ups and downs, but mostly ups!!!

Poor...tell me about it. It seems the older they get, the more expensive the gifts get. UGH! FI has a boy 12, and a girl 7.

It's nice to know there's someone on here going through the same situation I am.

Are the girls involved in the wedding? If so, how if you don't mind me asking.

I don't mean to butt in....

I have an INSTANT family too!!!!

We obtained custody of his two sons back in April and it's been great. I have a son of my own also. Hopefully after the wedding we'll get custody of his daughter (LONG STORY)!!!

I agree, it's very hard but it's so worth it in the end!!!

You are not butting in at all - I was actually in LIF looking for more women like me.....

I think it's tough because I don't have kids of my own yet... Sometimes I wish we could just have everything together for the first time - but thats me in a selfish moment - I love the girls!!!

That's perfectly natural to feel that way. I wish I could have given him his first child too. We're not planning on having any children of our own, so we've decided to just enjoy the four we have. It was a tough decision in the beginning but it was a great one in the end. We really want to enjoy eachother more than anything!!

Plus I'm too old for diapers and 2 am feedings!!!

Mine wants to wait FOREVER!!!!

It's natural to want to wait. Enjoy eachother as husband and wife!!! How many are you guys wanting to have? Your clock will keep ticking!!! If a 60 year old can have a baby anyone can!!

Aida, So not butting in....PLEASE! That's awesome that you guys have custody. I ouwld imagine it's difficult though with not having custody of both, right?

lipglossjunky...I feel the same way sometimes. There are times when you just wish that you were starting from the beginning with EVERYTHING, ya know. I guess the upside to that, atleast when I look at it, is that I KNOW Fi is already a great father. I guess the hardest part for me though, is that we can't have children the traditional way, if you know what I mean.

We're actually going to start with the baby process right away, b/c it may take a while. FI is 8 years older than myself, and I think we want 2 more. It'll so be worth it in the end. We're not getting any younger, that's for sure!

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Posted by drtrish03

Aida, So not butting in....PLEASE! That's awesome that you guys have custody. I ouwld imagine it's difficult though with not having custody of both, right?

lipglossjunky...I feel the same way sometimes. There are times when you just wish that you were starting from the beginning with EVERYTHING, ya know. I guess the upside to that, atleast when I look at it, is that I KNOW Fi is already a great father. I guess the hardest part for me though, is that we can't have children the traditional way, if you know what I mean.

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Yes - its great to see him as a dad...

Sometimes he'll talk about when his ex had their babies, or about things they did together as a family - and they had more money to do things.... I hope we will be able to do those things with our children as well....

As for kids - I have a good chance of twins in my family - so we'll see....

Another person butting in but I don't want to apologize since it's great to know that there are others in the same situation.

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Posted by lipglossjunky73

You are not butting in at all - I was actually in LIF looking for more women like me.....

I think it's tough because I don't have kids of my own yet... Sometimes I wish we could just have everything together for the first time - but thats me in a selfish moment - I love the girls!!!

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This is exactly how I feel. Sometimes I get so down thinking that he's experienced all this before.

FH has custody of his two daughters, ages 14 and 12.

Where have you ladies been????

I posted a while back - but didnt get many responses - I also went onto LIF looking for women in my position!!!

I am so glad I have ladies to talk to about this...

we really should have a gtg at some point!!!

I agree about the GTG.

Hey Steflily. Welcome to the Instafamily thread..hehe!

Sorry we weren't here for you before sweetie when you posted a while ago. But, we're here for you now and that's all that matters.

Atleast now I know there are girls that I can vent to who know what the heck we go through.....the good, the bad and the ugly!

Yeah, it's great that we have custody of the boys but he really wants custody of his daughter too. It's all around a bad situation between him and his ex and now her husband!!! ANOTHER LONG STORY!!!

But hey, we're half way there. I know all the frustrations, we've been together for 3 1/2 years.

Do you ladies get along with their ex??

Aida,
Unfortunately not. I tried in the beginning. She blamed me for their breakup, but I didn't even know my FI when she threw him out. I guess she just needs an excuse.

She did come up to me once while we were dropping off the kids (she was drinking), but she did say thank you for all that I do for the kids and that the kids really do love me. That really meant alot to me. Unfortunately, she says so many bad things about FI, calling him a bad father, etc,etc, etc, so it's very hard for me to like her.

The only thing is, and I know this believe me, I need to be the bigger person for the kids sake. It's just so freakin hard! I don't want them growing up thinking that we can't be in the same room together or around eachother. When I think about that, it bothers the living poop out of me!

What about you?

I'm joining this thread too!! My FH has a daughter from his previous marriage. I say, just add water and we've got InstaFamily!! Her mom has custody of her but we have her on the weekends, everything's great btw us and I'm so glad that it's not one of those difficult situations.

She's 8 and altho I absolutely adore her, sometimes I wish I could've given him his 1st child. It's a bit selfish but he understands, he always tries to see things from my point of view when I have difficult times. Tho as things progress I'm finding it's getting easier. I just can't wait for the 3 of us to all have the same last name so I really feel like part of the family!!