Search in your own words. Describe what you need or ask a wedding planning question.
So my little sister and I used to have a great relationship. Since she has been dating this guy, she has done a complete 180. She has been doing drugs, disrespecting my parents... and she has said some truely hurtful things to me and about me to people that I work with. It has hurt me so bad that I have pretty much been acting like she doesn't exist. I am so fed up with her drama and the fact that she makes up lies about me and my other familiy members to get attention from her boyfriend and his 'wonderful' parents (who are TOTAL enablers of their drug habits). I am scared something will happen to her one day but at the same time I don't like or respect the person she has become. She has not apologized to me and does not show any interest in my life or my wedding. The point of all this is, I don't want her to be a bridesmaid... I don't even want her at my wedding. Do you think I'm crossing the line by not inviting her? If a friend said those things to me... I would just write them off completely. I'm really sad about everything and really need advice...
do you think that by telling her that she isn't welcome until she changes her habits would serve as a wake up call?
I am so sorry you are going through this. MY brother also has a history of a drug problem, and while he is doing ok right now (after 2 bouts of rehab), he is living in CA and we are not that close. I think you should invite her to your wedding, but not have her as a bridesmaid. You may to radically accept the possibility that she won't show up, or that she will make a scene, and be prepared to handle that- maybe assign a family member or friend to deal with it. I think you have to think about how you will feel in 5 or 10 years from now. You have every right to only have people in your BP who are important to you right now, and who can contribute to helping you on our special day, no ADDING stress. Nobody can tell you what to do though- you have to do what feels right to you.
