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LOOONG vent-FH makes me MAD!!!

Original post by mhermanns

Biggest fight....I am soo mad!! Please tell me if I am wrong.
The other day I ordered the invitations. I put our WHOLE names (first, middle and last) and when I told FH he said he didn't want his middle name because people think its spanish when its italian. So I prayed that I was going to be able to change it in the morning. So thank god, I called in the AM and was able to change it. I took off BOTH our middle names. So I am thinking about it all day and its bothering me that I took off my middle name. (mind you, FH and I didn't talk all night until 12pm the next day because I was mad he was making me change it-but because it really meant alot to him to not have his name on there, then I would do it) So then this morning, the lady who originally helped me, called me and asked me if I made those changes (because I didn't talk to her) and the place that is making the invitations was just calling to make sure that everything was ok on the proof. So she called me and I asked if she could make one last change and keep my middle name on there and she did. So tonight FH and I are at dinner having beer and appetizers and having a nice time and I don't know why (maybe I had a buzz already) but I bring up how the lady called me and asked if I had any changes and it mustve been luck because I didn't think I would be able to make anymore changes, and now I am happy because I got to have my middle name on it. WELL, FH throws a fit at dinner telling me that there are 2 people in this relationship and that I shouldve asked him if he wanted his middle name and that he was teased as a kid and that's why he didn't want his middle name on it. So now, its MY fault that his middle name isn't on there and now it looks stupid cause mine is on there. I didn't call him to ask if it was ok if I had my middle name on there because its MY name. And I didn't ask him if he wanted his name on it because he already made a big stink about it the night before with a fight about how he didn't want his middle name on it and I didn't want to have another fight. So then he proceeds to ask for his keys so he can go home and then proceeds to take his beer and pour the whole thing in my BRAND NEW bag....all over my phone, wallet, mail....EVERYTHING. If you are like me, your life is in your bag.....I AM SOOOO MAD! How childish. Then he left me in the restaurant to pay the bill with WET money and he went home. So, AM I WRONG?? I don't know why he got mad and then completely contradicted himself and when I told him that, he still doesn't get it. UGH!!! Sorry for the long vent but I am soooooooooooo mad!! And I came home and my parents are like 'what are you doing home?' and I don't want to tell them what happened because then it just escalates and I don't need to hear them as well. So I am venting here. Thanks girls!
happygirl07 Posted:

Re: LOOONG vent-FH makes me MAD!!!


Posted by AlliCatB


literally, my mouth just fell open when I read that.

You are NOT wrong. He's being a big NOT to mention someone needs a little anger management attention and that SOMEONE is not you.

I don't care if you accidentally threw away his favorite outfit, scratched his car or set his @ss on fire - what you did here was an accident. His response was purposeful and full of spite. It is never okay and he will never be justified to damage your stuff and then humiliate you by leaving you alone in a restaurant??

oh HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHELL no.



I'm sorry you're going through this honey, but you need to set some serious boundaries here. It sounds like he doesn't know how to properly express himself. Maybe you guys should sit down and talk abuot how his actions can effect your relationship in a negative way.

And I agree with the comment that the FHs barely help but love to complain. Mine is the poster child.



FM if you need some support.



I couldn't agree with you more. TOTALLY unacceptable.
Marchbride07 Posted:

Re: LOOONG vent-FH makes me MAD!!!

That was sooo wrong and really, if I am coming off wrong I apologize in advance, but I think you need to speak to a counselor with him because that was a total over the top way to respond to something so inconseqential in the long run....you totally have the right to be mad!!!

Soon2BMrsJoeF Posted:

Re: LOOONG vent-FH makes me MAD!!!

If he poured a beer in my bag I would have poured one on his head....What a JERK.


He def owes you a new bag and a Louie at that!

PS - I would just watch that temper of his.
neener1211 Posted:

Re: LOOONG vent-FH makes me MAD!!!

There is no way in HE LL that i'd allow that kind of behavior. I don't even know what to say bc there is no way that my FH would EVER do that to me. omg

2Be1 Posted:

Re: LOOONG vent-FH makes me MAD!!!

IMHO the whole wedding planning experience is a prequel to what married life will be like. You will definitely have arguments some of them over silly little stuff like invitations, some of them over more serious things like finances. The key is learning when to stand your ground and when to back down and compromise even if you don’t want to. You have to learn a healthy form of communication, sometimes agree to disagree and realize that neither one of you will be able to have it your way all the time. Now I’m not going to judge your decision about the whole middle name incident, but I will say this your FH’s reaction was completely inappropriate and disrespectful.

ETA: Learning to spell
TnOiOnL Posted:

Re: LOOONG vent-FH makes me MAD!!!

whhhhoa! at first i thought- ehhh no biggie, every couple has little fights like this! and then i read how he poured his drink in ur bag! OMG! and in PUBLIC!!! He's got balls of steal girl!!!! Honestly, he shouldNOT have reacted that way, very childish! But once this whole thing is over, the both of you will be in hysterics over it. Thats something that FH would do to me if i cheated on him.. not over an invitation!!!!!!!

I think you both are just overwhelmed, these times are hard on everyone, very stressful.. hang in there and ask him to TALK to you about it!!!!!!!!
faithandkevin Posted:

Re: LOOONG vent-FH makes me MAD!!!

I cannot believe he ruined your belongings in public!! Over something so trivial. It sounds like he is mad about something bigger than just trhe invites.

But it is true that FH's care about the wierdest things. And don't care at all about other things!!
MF9282 Posted:

Re: LOOONG vent-FH makes me MAD!!!

#1 What's the difference if your middle name is on it and his isn't. You want yours, and he does not want his??? You did as he wished, are you suppose to do whatever he wants? Its both your weddings and compromises need to be made sometimes.

#2 Is he out of his marbles ??? If FH ever did this to me, left me and poured beer in my bag!!! I'd kill him, absolutely murder him!! That is beyond disrepsctful it is quite disgusting.

He owes you a HUGE apology!!!
(And a new bag)

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