Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

Ok, here's what happened. I got a phone call from future MIL the other day. She tells me that I have to take the microwave off of my registry because she bought one for FH for Christmas. She tells me that she found a microwave that is just as good as the one we registered for, but it was much cheaper somewhere else. We're talking over $100 vs. $40. I'm thinking great, what a bargain! But then I ask her if it's the same one and she tells me that it's NOT, but she claims that it has all of the same features, it's just a different brand (a brand that I've never even heard of). Here's my problem; why would she take the time to check out what we registered for and then decide that she knows better and get something else? My FH and I spent many hours over many days picking out exactly what we need/want for our future home. We realize that we will both be working full time and will probably be cooking dinner in the microwave a lot, so we decided that we needed a good quality brand name microwave. She even came along one of the times that we registered, so she knows how much work was put into it. It's one thing if you don't like shopping from registries, but to take the time to check out the registry and then buy a cheaper version of what we want? If we wanted that microwave, we would have registered for it!!! It's not like she didn't know exactly which one we wanted!
Ok maybe I'm being a brat. I know the whole 'a gift is a gift' and 'I should be grateful for whatever she gets me', but she is famous for this. And she is not exactly the type of person to save the receipt either. This was all in addition to FH's aunt's comments about how one of the stores that we registered at is so expensive and totally not worth it and besides we can get all of the same stuff at TJ Maxx. Am I being a total snob?

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

First of all then tell the aunt to get the SAME gifts at those stores and take them off your list if that is possible..

I know that is what I would do.. Why make a big deal..

I have no patience for that.

Tell her NICELY as you can that this is the microwave you both chose and its the one YOU WANT!!
Tell her to return the one she got FH!! Unless bc its so good she would rather keep it for herself!!!

People UGH!!!

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

No, I don't think that you're being a snob at all. My MIL and her sisters are famous for this! Some things I don't mind, like if I just needed any one of that item, and didn't care about the brand. However, some of the things I registered for I chose based on brand name, and research that I did into the specific item. I wish there was an option on the registry to say, needed 1 colander, any type, so people like that could actually pick whichever one they wanted. This way they know which things I really want because I need it, or which ones I want because I want that specific item. Did that just make sense?

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

I don't think you're being a snob! I would be mad too. What she did makes no sense. If a couple is registered, I would never buy a different item than the one they picked. If I saw it cheaper somewhere else, I'd buy it, but I wouldn't just go out and buy something totally different. What's the point of registries then?
How is your relationship with her? Can you explain to her that you want the one that you registered for? or maybe your FH can tell her nicely.

Good Luck!

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

OMG! That's terrible!! That's like wanting a gucci bag and getting a fucci lol

is her bday coming up?? revenge is a BIT CH!

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

Thank you Theresa! I have no problem with her buying the same EXACT thing somewhere else for cheaper. Hey that's great! I'm all about saving money! But if it's not the same, well, then pick something else out.

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

DO NOT BY ANY MEANS TAKE IT OFF YOUR REGISTRY!! Let FMIL buy the crappy one and use it until someone else comes along and gets you the one you have one your registry. That is not her decision! She has every right to buy you whatever kind of microwave she wants to, but she has some nerve asking you to take it off YOUR registry. So keep it on, graciously accept the x-mas gift and look forward to your shower!

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

And if it is on your registry why would she buy her son a microwave for Christmas!!?? It's already on your registry.. that should not be a Christmas present.

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

Marcellabella - Can you tell me where to get a fucci bag? I nearly fell on the floor laughing so hard because that is totally something she would do!

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

She should never have bought it. She should have called when she found it in the store and asked you if that was what you wanted and how would this be instead? Be careful.... Does she not want you to have nice things? Why would she not get her son and you a nice one? Is she jealous? My ex-FI's mother used to make sure my gifts and possessions were not as nice as her. All I have to say is.... A $40 microwave?!!! Are you sure?

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

Yeah, my FMIL has done this also. I registered for all of the Hoffritz utensils at Fortunoff because I LOVE them and I'm dying for them...so she went and ordered me some new fangeled KitchenAid ones that I hate for Christmas...and even worse...ordered them in RED.

I think it's a requirement that MIL's take a class in this crap.

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

i agree with ddune. Don't take it off your registry and let someone else buy it for you. Let her give the microwave she bought and then return it claiming that something is wrong with it or it doesn't work.' good luck!

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

Marcela - She brought this up a few weeks ago that she saw a microwave somewhere for like forty dollars. I told her that we already registered for one, thinking that she'd get the hint. Well, I guess she didn't. I told FH about this, but I left out what the actual gift is and he already said that whatever it is, he probably doesn't want it.

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

Don't take it off the registry...let someone else buy it and return hers. If you register for it that means YOU WANT IT!!!!!!!!!

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

Wow! I was not expecting this kind of response. I almost removed my post thinking that I was being a spoiled brat! Thanks everyone!
2000baby - We told our family when they asked that what we really needed for Christmas was items off of our registry. Not a very exciting holiday, but that's what we need more than anything else.
Sept20yay! - Yup! $40!!! I think it's from BJ's. She's a real bargain shopper!
Mistyeyed - Red!!! FMIL has green plastic ones!

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

Ugh! What a pain! What a sticky situation!

I second ddunne23. If FMIL asks why it's still on your registry (and you don't want to get into it) just blame the store for not taking it off. Good luck!

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

I guess the days of you having a choice just went out the window...Don't feel forced to take something that you do not want. I know it might sound ungreatful but she knew and she should not have gone behind you and gotten something that is not even close to what you guys registered for. Tell her or let FI tell her. Nicely that is.

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

Absolutely leave your registery alone. Hopefully you will get the one you want in addition to your FI's.

You may find that down the line a second microwave might come in handy. You could always use your DH's microwave 'from his single days' in a finished basement or rec room.

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

i agree with ddunne...dont take it off the registry...send her a subtle message for the future!

Re: Mini vent. . . Am I crazy?

Helene... Oh Ok That makes sense. I wish people did that for us then I would of got EVERYTHING and not a hundred towels to return!! Definetly leave your registry alone. You should get what you two picked out.Especially like you said ... you know you will be using it alot and you want one you know you can rely on.
There always has to be someone to drive us a little nuts( I think it's a rule)