Mommies with Toddlers - Please come in!

When did you start doing time outs? anyone have any tips or advice on how to make it actually work?

TIA!

I started when my son was 3 - I used a time out chair - just a regular chair set away from toys and anything that might entertain him.
I started with one minute time outs - which to them is a long time. Then I would ask 'are you ready to behave now?' and depending on his response I would either let him down, or leave him another minute. At first I would actually have to hold him there - keep putting him back on the chair - but after a while he got the idea. Now he's 7 and every now and then I still have to send him to his room for a time out.

I started them around 2 when he would start doing things JUST because I said not to. I would put him in his crib for 2 min.

Now at the age of 3 he knows when I say do you want a time out he knows (most of the time) not to do what he's about to. His time out is now 5 minutes.

Thanks ladies!! The crib thing wont work for me b/c hes is already in a big boy bed and if you sit him down in a chair he wont stay or throws himself on the floor instead. My DH gets mad sometimes and yells and I know he understands that b/c he will come run and hug me and put his head down... either that or throw himself on the floor and cry even harder.
When he does this at my IL'S house they baby him and make him think its ok. but we just ignore him or it will go on forever.
I dont know what else to do

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Posted by brideinapril

I started when my son was 3 - I used a time out chair - just a regular chair set away from toys and anything that might entertain him.
I started with one minute time outs - which to them is a long time. Then I would ask 'are you ready to behave now?' and depending on his response I would either let him down, or leave him another minute. At first I would actually have to hold him there - keep putting him back on the chair - but after a while he got the idea. Now he's 7 and every now and then I still have to send him to his room for a time out.

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You sound like SuperNanny! That's exactly what she does on her shows!

I think we started the time outs around 2 years old, maybe a month before. (he's 2 1/2 now) Luke has a booster chair with straps and we put him in that and face it towards the corner. I have heard many times that a time out should be 1 minute per year - so he gets 2 minutes. We always follow it up by asking if he knows why he got a time out and he always does know. Then we ask for an apology - if its menacing the baby, she gets the apology. Then he gets a hug or kiss, something that he knows its over with. As he's getting bigger, of course we will have to change the method b/c I could see a kid giving a very rote apology and then palying up the hug and kiss to try to get out of trouble. We try not to do it for every thing otherwise it can be totally ineffective. Now hes starting to stay in the chair without the straps b/c he knows that's why he's there - but I have had a few times where I swore he was going to break the chair throwing a fit b/c he was put in a time out but thank gof those arent that often. But he does protest the time out so I know it's still effective.

I think it's important to make sure they know Why they got the time out so def follow up with that Q at the end.